


Companion

by Harlow92



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alive Mary Winchester, Alpha Dean, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Castiel, Bottom Dean, Caring John Winchester, Gabriel Being Gabriel, Human Castiel, Hurt Dean Winchester, M/M, Mary Ships It, Omega Castiel, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Castiel, Protective Dean Winchester, Protective Gabriel, Protective Sam Winchester, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Top Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2019-06-19 22:03:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 47,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15519573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harlow92/pseuds/Harlow92
Summary: Dean is a companion, or a legal prostitute as he likes to call himself. Cas is an omega with a partner who won’t mate him.When the two meet, their lives are changed and it’s not necessarily in a good way.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t own any of these characters but I do, however, own any mistakes made grammatically or otherwise.
> 
> This is my first attempt at an ABO universe sooo.. fingers crossed it goes well.
> 
> I’m a few chapters ahead and will try to stay that way but I can’t make any guarantees. Also I might be adding more tags as I go along.
> 
> Thank you for reading!

Chapter One

Dean sat on the beach and watched as the waves rolled in. The late October night made his skin rise with goosebumps as the damp sand leaked through his shorts. 

He had always found the ocean peaceful, it was part of the reason why he moved to the town in North Carolina after everything changed. He could seek out the solace he so restlessly fought for in the soundtrack of the waves rolling in. During the summer he spent most of his time in the water, he’d even taken up surfing much to Sam’s amusement. In the fall he would sit on the sand and watch as the waves brought in crabs that would rush back towards the water. In the winter he sat on his back porch wrapped in a blanket and looked out upon the water, wondering when it would be warm enough for him to get back in.

It had been two years since he’d hurriedly packed his bags and made the move from Lawrence. Leaving his life and family behind him. When he arrived in Beaufort he knew that he wanted it to be his home. Sure it was touristy, but Dean didn’t mind. He liked the cliche shops and sounds of families enjoying their summer vacations on the beach. 

He wasn’t sure how he’d gotten lucky enough to get his beach front house at so little cost, but he wasn’t complaining about it. Figured it was the lucky break he’d deserved after what had happened. 

Dean worked a few odd jobs before the word got spread around that he was pretty handy. He was now the one most people called when they needed something fixed around their house or business. About seven months ago Sam helped him file for an EIN and make his business legitimate. The thing with tourist towns was there always something that needed to be fixed.

Over all it was quiet and easy, something that Dean didn’t used to have much of. He still found himself wondering what would have happened if everything had gone the way he wanted? Would he be happier than he was now? He knew the answer to that question was yes, but he tried not to think about it too much. 

He couldn’t mourn the loss of something he never had.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The parts in regular script represent present day while the italics represent the past. 
> 
> As always thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy.

Chapter Two

“Hey Dean, you got time to stop by the studio tomorrow and take a look at the pipes?” Lisa asked when she noticed Dean walking towards his pick up.

“Yeah, should have some. When will you be there?” Dean smiled as she jogged in pace, checking her heart rate with her fingers pressed against her pulse point. While she looked amazing in her yogas showing off every curve and muscle of her legs, it was her scent that most affected Dean.

It was dull, which didn’t surprise him. Not only was she a beta, but since he’d had the chance to smell his true mate no other scent would ever compare. Dean wished more than anything that he could play along with her flirtations, that one day he’d be able to tell her she didn’t have to ask him to take a look at pipes that obviously weren’t broken in order to spend time with him. He also knew that that would never happen.

*

Cas stood on the beach and watched the sun rise with a cup of coffee cradled in his hands. He wore loose linen pants and a light weight sweatshirt that let the cold bite his skin. He had gotten to Beaufort the night before with his brother and sister dragging him along. They said it would be a fun sibling get away.

Cas didn’t buy it.

Everyone who knew him knew that he had been... off for the better part of two years. They drug him here as a last ditch effort to get their little brother back. The sad thing was, he knew they wouldn’t.

*~*

_Cas stood at the kitchen counter, his back rigid with anger. Balthazar traipsed around the apartment with his bag in hand as he went about giving instructions to whoever he was on the phone with._

_“.... Yes there is a spare room with a lock, it will be the second door on the right, as well as a private bathroom.... There won’t be any one but the omega, I will be on a business trip, otherwise we wouldn’t resort to this measure.... If you could send that to my email it would be much appreciated.” Balthazar finished before hanging up the phone and looking towards his partner._

_“Oh Cassie, don’t worry. They’re the best around.” He said lightly as he planted his hands on either side of Cas’s face._

_“I don’t need a Companion, Zar.” He said petulantly as he looked away from the man before him._

_“You’re in heat, Cassie. I know how you get during those and I can’t stand the thought of you going it alone.” Balthazar scolded and walked towards the sink. Cas watched as he filled up the water bottle he had set out earlier._

_“I’m a grown man, I can take care of my own needs.” Cas spat and glared._

_“Oh please, your such a knot slut your brain doesn’t know it should be my knot you’re coming on when you’re in heat.” Balthazar laughs to himself before noticing the dejected look on Cas’s face._

_“You’re my Alpha, Zar, you shouldn’t be jumping at the idea of another one touching me.” Cas said, even though they weren’t technically mates they had been together for over a year. Sure they didn’t have marks, but they shared everything else including the apartment Balthazar was too excited to get out of._

_“Call me progressive Cas. I’m going to be gone and I want to make sure you’re taken care of, is that so bad?” Balthazar asked with a sigh of annoyance._

_“I won’t let the alpha knot me.” Cas said defiantly._

_“Sure, we’ll see how long you stick to your guns.” Balthazar laughed before walking up to Cas and kissing him gently._

_“You’ll call when you get there?” Cas asked against his wishes._

_“Of course. Stay fed and hydrated.” Balthazar said before walking out the door._

_*_

_Dean winked at the Beta nurse and she rolled her eyes in response. In hindsight, picking up on the person who was giving you an std test probably wasn’t the best idea, but could you blame a man for trying?_

_“Your results will be ready in ten minutes.” She said as she gathered her clip board and took the plastic gloves off._

_“You know who to send them to?” Dean asked while stuffing his phone and keys into his pocket._

_“Yes Dean, same place every time.” She said with annoyance thick in her tone._

_As he walked out of the doctor’s office he could feel the vibration of his phone in his pocket. Dean fished it out as he unlocked the door to the Impala._

_“This is Dean.” He says gruffly while situating himself behind the wheel._

_“Well hello dearie, did you get your test done?” The lilt of his boss’s accent comes through the phone._

_“Yeah, they should be sending you the results here pretty quickly.” He answered while adjusting the ac to full blast._

_“Excellent. I have a pay check for you and another job if you’re up for it.” Dean knew that there wasn’t an option, but he appreciated that Rowena had the decency to act like he had a choice in the matter._

_“Yeah, I’m up for it. Be there in about twenty?” Dean asks._

_“That’s perfect.” Rowena responds before ending the call abruptly._

_Dean sighs as he pulls out into traffic. It had been two days since his last client and that was more of a break than he normally received. He was still exhausted thinking about it._

_Dean had been a Companion for years it seemed. It was a fancy word for prostitute. Luckily this kind of pimping was legal. He provided services for omegas in heat. Which was another fancy way of saying he gave them his knot._

_He started out working for a less than desirable agency when he first moved out of his parents’ house. It was dirty and he wasn’t proud, but eventually Rowena caught wind of his large client base and recruited him. At least with her agency the companions and their clients were required to get tested regularly._

_There were also little things that made their lives easier. Like the fact that every client was to provide their companion with a separate bedroom, for the alpha companions it was courteous to have a lock on the inside of the room but it was a requirement for the omega companions. Food and travel was compensated for by the client as well as the regular pay for using the services of a companion, which Rowena graciously only took 30 percent of. She said it kept her companions loyal and nothing brought business in like having the best damn product around. Sure they were more pricey than the other agencies, but it was worth it._

_A Companion was not only supposed to be there for the sexual needs of their clients, they needed to care for their well being as well. They were to make sure the alpha in rut or omega in heat had adequate food and water, clean clothes and bedding, and they were to help them bathe. Dean lost count of how many omegas he had to force feed in the past two years._

_The surprising consensus of society was that it was an honorable thing to do. Companions used their secondary gender to provide comfort and care for those around them. Though if you asked Dean, it was all about the money, because some of the shit he’d seen wouldn’t be worth it without that nice paycheck._

_When he pulled up to the inconspicuous building on Main, he put his baby into park and locked the doors gently. At the front desk Dorothy smiled at him openly._

_“Dean.” She nodded her head. When he had first started working here he met Dorothy and thought it would be funny to set her and Charlie up. He figured it would be a disaster with Dorothy’s no nonsense attitude and Charlie’s love of nonsense. Well apparently the joke was on him because they’d been mated for nine months now._

_“Hey Dorothy, where’s the Wicked Witch at?” He winked as she rolled her eyes._

_“You know I can hear you?” Rowena chimed as she walked out of her office smiling at Dean like she was going to murder him. She definitely could._

_“Come on now, boss lady, all out of love.” Dean smiled and followed the red head into her office._

_“You know, one day you’re going to realize I quit buying your line of bull shit a long time ago.” She said in a sing song voice. Dean just laughed easily and sat in the chair across from her desk._

_“This line of bull shit doesn’t quit.” Dean smirked as Rowena rolled her eyes and opened her desk drawer._

_“First things first, your check,” She handed an envelope to Dean, who took it unceremoniously and opened just enough to peak at the numbers. He let out a low whistle.  
“Yes it was busy month for you, dearie.” She said smiling._

_“You sure this thing isn’t going to bounce when I go deposit it?” Dean jokes._

_“Please, my checks do not bounce.” Rowena scoffed before grabbing a file out of her desk and putting it in front of Dean._

_“This the omega?” He said curiously while flipping through the papers. The background check, STD scan, and payment all looked in order. Dean was sorta shocked to see the address in a swanky neighborhood. Sure they had rich clientele, but Rowena usually used the more refined companions on them, not that Dean was complaining. He made good money and didn’t have to worry about rich snobbish omegas barking orders at him._

_“Yes, he’s a new client. It’s a bit of an odd situation. Seems he has an alpha boyfriend that isn’t willing to cancel his business trip but wants to make sure his little omega has a knot to keep satisfied.” Rowena shrugged at the shocked look on Dean’s face. He’d never heard of an another alpha willingly asking a companion to take care of their partner._

_“Must not be mated then.” Dean says as he continues scanning the documents._

_“I get the feeling not. Nevertheless, though, I think it best you wear scent blockers so as not to mix up the scent of their home.” Rowena says as Dean looks more shocked than he had before. It was another rule that companions never wear scent blockers, their natural musk was supposed to help their clients in their time of need._

_“Whatever you say boss.” Dean shrugs and stands, grabbing the file as he goes._

_“It’ll be a week, you know the drill. Make sure you pack enough to get you by and if you don’t check in I’ll send old Benny knocking.” Dean shivered at the thought of a small omega having to face the gruff beta he was lucky to call a friend._

_“Sure thing.” He says as he walks towards the door. Dean stops by Dorothy’s desk to let her know that he won’t be able to make it to game night, to which she nods and says she’ll let Charlie know._

_Dean drives the Impala to the bank first, depositing a couple hundred into Sam’s account, enough for a nice dinner into his parents’, and the rest into his own account. He sent a quick text to his brother to let him know that Santa came early this year. He tries to give them money as much as he can while still saving up for something good that may come his way. With his paychecks getting larger each time he goes to pick them up it’s easier to do._

_Sam was off in California going to college. Dean knew that he didn’t have to give the kid money, but the full ride only covered school and cost of living. He wanted Sam to be able to enjoy his college years without having to worry about working or missing out on the fun stuff. So what if some of the money Dean gave him fueled drunken underage parties, wasn’t that what college was all about?_

_His parents, well that was another story entirely. After watching John and Mary struggle to feed and clothe two growing boys for so many years, Dean felt like it was only right that he help them through their own financial struggles when he could. The first time Dean had deposited money into their account Mary cried as John said there was no way they could accept it. Dean had told him to quit being a damn fool and get caught up on their mortgage payments. They never talked about it again. Now he just got simple texts of thanks from Mary while they, unknowingly to Dean, put every penny he gave them into a savings account for him._

_The next thing Dean did was drive to his two bedroom apartment and close things up for the week. He made sure everything was unplugged, all the lights were off, and that the heater was turned down so it would be just warm enough to keep the pipes from freezing. After showering he packed up his clothes in a duffel bag before looking at his bed with sadness. He had bought the damn thing a couple months back but could count on his hands how many times he’d actually slept in it._

_The apartment was sparse, just a place for passing through. Dean hadn’t taken much time to decorate or make it feel like a home because, as far as he was concerned, it wasn’t. The white walls were stark and the gray carpet dull as he walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water for the road. He rarely kept food in the fridge because he never knew when he was going to be able to cook it, which was a shame. The kitchen was nice compared to the rest of the place and he often felt he was doing it a disservice by not using it._

_The living room had a dilapidated green couch that was comfortable enough and a big screen Tv sitting on an entertainment center Dean had picked up from a thrift store. There were two large book shelves filled with books in all genres that also displayed a few family pictures. A card table with two folding chairs sat next to the window, Dean never used it. It was pretty pitiful if you asked him, but he knew one day he would have a real home filled with real memories, comfortable furniture, and the smells of food cooking in the kitchen. One day he’d have that, until then he just saved as much he could until it came time to fill that home._

_Dean doubled back to his room when he realized he’d forgotten his blockers and a box of condoms, he never knew if his clientele took preventative measures until he actually met them. It was always best to go prepared._

_When he got back into the Impala after locking up the apartment he sighed before turning Zeppelin all the way up, letting the chords of lead guitar drown out the self loathing he always felt heading to a job._


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!

Chapter Three

Dean wiped his hands on his pants and pulled out a notebook from his back pocket and the pencil from its resting place behind his ear. He wrote down the measurements for the parts he would need to fix the kitchen sink of Guthrie’s Bed and Breakfast.

The place was old and Dean could swear he was out here once a week to fix something, but he wasn’t complaining. The couple that owned it were young and just starting out, from what Dean understood they had bought it a couple months before he moved into town. Lucky for them it was already an established business or they wouldn’t be making enough to keep the place afloat.

Dean explained what he’d have to do to fix the sink to Adam and left ensuring that he would have it up and running before they had to serve dinner. The hardware store was close enough for him to walk and he got the chance to enjoy the leaves changing into fall colors. A few people waved and said their pleasantries to him as he made his way along the sidewalk.

When Dean got to the store he headed straight to the section he needed before walking towards the counter. That’s when he smelled it. The faint lingering of a scent he used to become intoxicated by years before.

There was no stopping his feet as Dean frantically looked around the aisles trying to place where it was coming from. He needed to know the source even though he knew it wouldn’t be from whom he was hoping it was.

There was a small red head wandering the lumber aisle. She wasn’t anyone that Dean had seen around town so he presumed she was a tourist, but he knew without a doubt that the scent was coming from her.

He tried to approach inconspicuously while scenting the air. It had been so long since he’d smelled anything close to it. Dean couldn’t help but return the small smile she gave him as she continued looking at small pieces of wood.

She was beautiful in an uncommon way, her large eyes were brown and they had a sparkle to them that told Dean she wasn’t as cookie cutter as she might appear. Though he could tell she was trying hard to look as if she belonged in this aisle, the deep frown gave away her need for help.

“You finding what you need ma’am?” He asked gently, the manners his mom had engrained never quite forgotten.

“Oh I,” She said before pausing and laughing. “Am I that obvious?” She asked a little helplessly as she stared at Dean with those wide eyes.

“No, I just figured on the off chance that you needed help I’d hate to be the one who just ignored you.” Dean smiled as she looked at him with her head cocked to the side. He refused to think about who it reminded him of.

“Well aren’t you the gentleman? I’m just looking for something to make a bird house out of.” She shrugged as she turned her attention back to the wood.

“Well, if you don’t mind my help, I think this stuff right here is your best bet.” Dean said pointing to a board off to the right.

“Don’t mind at all, truth be told I’m kind of lost in this aisle. This is more of my brother’s forte.” She smiled as Dean set his basket down and lifted the board onto the cart she had in front of her.

“Oh yeah? He teaching you how to make a bird house?” He asked curiously.

“No, I’m trying to get him the things he would need to build one. He used to love woodworking, but uh, he’s kind of left it behind recently. I’m hoping this will help spark his imagination.” She said sadly. Dean couldn’t miss the love inflecting her tone as she smiled at him.

“Well, maybe he’ll get it back.” He shrugged and smiled awkwardly before grabbing his basket and taking one last breath of the scent that wasn’t quite there to be enough.

“Yeah, maybe,” she returned Dean’s smile before walking closer to him. “Hey, would you mind helping me find the rest of the stuff he’ll need?”

Dean can think of a million reasons why he should just get going. One of the main ones being that he was already becoming dependent on the faint scent he was pulling off of her, but in that moment he knew he couldn’t deny her.

“Yeah, I’ve just got a job to finish but this shouldn’t take too long.” He murmured before returning the happy smile she gave him.

*~*

_Cas lay on the bed sweating and shaking. His heat was just starting out and he could already tell it was going to be a painful one. The last time he went to a doctor for how bad his heats had gotten they told him it was his body’s way of warning that the biological time clock was ticking. His body was literally begging for a pup._

_He supposed he should just get it taken care of, take out the parts that made him so miserable during a heat, but there was still a small voice in the back of his mind saying that maybe one day Zar would want a pup. Maybe one day he would change his mind and they could start a family. That would probably happen around the time his partner actually committed to mating him._

_Cas laughed angrily as he thought of Balthazar flying first class to wherever the hell he was going while he laid in bed miserable. Of course the other man had made it sound so reasonable that he wouldn’t take time off to help Cas through this even though his work offered time off for this specific reason. Zar couldn’t take time off when he was so close to making Senior Partner of the advertising firm he had been slaving away for._

_It had made sense to Cas when he wasn’t in heat, but now that he was laying in bed gushing slick he wondered why Zar had been so fucking selfish. He thought that he was ok with it, but the bitterness in his heart told him otherwise._

_Balthazar had promised him that the nights spent apart and the hours spent schmoozing the executives would make sense when he was able to provide a good life for both of them. Cas’s idea of a good life was being able to spend time with the man he loved._

_Cas stared bitterly at the ceiling as he heard the sound of the front door unlocking. He knew it would be the companion coming in, undoubtedly having gotten the spare key from Zar when he signed up for the services months before. The idea infuriated him as much as it left him feeling helpless._

_Here he lay in bed, dizzy with heat as some alpha was going to be roaming his apartment. Cas hadn’t told Balthazar that this idea quite honestly terrified him, that would just result in crude jokes and teasings that Cas didn’t want to put up with._

_He had spent all morning airing the apartment out, hoping that he could somehow chase the scents away, and applying blockers at an hourly interval. Cas didn’t want this alpha to go mad with the scent of his heat because he didn’t plan on partaking in any of the aid that the man was going to offer. He could take care of himself, thank you very much._

_He could hear the sound of footsteps on the hardwood floor leading back to the hall of bedrooms. There was a silent knock on his door that he ignored steadfastly before the loud sigh that followed._

_“Hello?” The deep voice got a reaction out of Cas that he cursed his body for. The feeling of slick gushing out disgusting him further._

_“Uh, well you let me know when you need me.” The voice said again before the footsteps began walking away. Cas knew that the man had gone into the room that was to be provided for a companion. He wondered momentarily what the alpha looked like before shaking himself._

_No matter what his body begged for, he didn’t need this man’s knot._

_*_

_Dean was bored. He’d spent all of three minutes in the apartment before deciding it was hell. The place was filled with knick knacks, books, and a nice tv that anyone would be jealous of, but it felt empty._

_Maybe it was the lack of scents, which Dean knew was due to the open window and the room spray designed specifically for covering the natural scent of an alpha or omega, or maybe it was the fact that everything looked so superficial. Whatever it was made the alpha feel uncomfortable. He knew without a doubt that this would be one of the longer weeks of his life._

_Dean also knew that the omega was behind the door in the hall way, he could hear the man shivering when he knocked on the door. He also knew that there was no way he was going to barge in on the man without invitation. If the omega wanted him to stay away he would do that. He was still going to get paid either way._

_Dean sighed as he walked to the room he presumed would be his, without affirmation from the owner there was no way for him to be sure. It wasn’t big by any means but it would do for the next week. He set his duffel bag on the middle of the bed and began unpacking his clothes. There was a dresser with a tv sitting on it, the remote was next to the bed on the nightstand._

_He noticed a note by the remote and walked over to pick it up and read. The handwriting was lazy and the message was for Dean, though he didn’t see why it was necessary. It just told him that the room had access to cable and that his bathroom was across the hall._

_When Dean was done putting away his clothes he pulled out his cell phone and dialed Sam out of boredom. He figured he could cook something for the omega when he was done._

_“Dean?” Sam answered, a smile on his voice._

_“Heya Sammy.” Dean said as he laid down on the bed._

_“Thanks for the money, you know you don’t have to do that.” Sam said. It was a conversation they’d gotten used to, everything that was said had been said countless times before._

_“I know, just wanna make sure you’ve got enough to get a haircut.” Dean smiled at Sam’s laugh._

_“Are you working this week?” Dean cringes at the question. It was a sore subject when it came to discussing his job. It had taken a long time for him to admit where all his money was coming from and his family hadn’t been particularly happy about it. Not that he expected them to be._

_“Yeah, got a job in a real fancy part of town. How’s that girl doing?” Dean asked changing the subject abruptly. Luckily Sam took the bait and went on for a good fifteen minutes about some chick name Jessica he’d met in his bio class. According to his brother, this girl hung the moon. Dean just hoped she deserved Sam’s affection._

_“Hey listen up kid, I’ve got to go, I’ll text you later?” Dean said when there was a lull in the conversation._

_“Yeah, sounds good Dean. Thanks again for the money.” Sam said awkwardly._

_“Anytime bitch.”_

_“Jerk.” With that Dean ended the call on a smile. He looked around the room briefly, the white walls were decorated with a couple colorful paintings and a clock. The wood floor had a big rug laying in the middle of it. It was a nice place to stay and at least the bed was comfortable._

_When he ventured out into the living area of the apartment he could hear the omega whimpering from behind the closed the door. Dean tried to approach the room as quietly as possible before knocking gently._

_“Hey man, I’m uh... I’m going to make you some dinner. Do you have any requests?” He asked nervously. Dean wasn’t used to being ignored by clients for this long and hoped that at the very least the omega would be good company._

_“No.” He heard the growl from behind the door. Well scratch the good company dream._

_Dean shook his head and he made his way to the kitchen and took stock of what the pair had in the fridge. He’d been doing this long enough to know that an omega would need something heavy and starchy to get through the first few days. Due to the mindless heats, often times they would forget or flat out refuse to eat, so it was important to make something that would last them a while._

_Dean smiled when he noticed the two steaks thawing in the fridge. He brought them out and picked a few seasonings before using the tenderizer he found in one of the drawers to beat at them a couple times. There was a small grill out on the balcony he’d noticed when he first came in, so he made way out there and turned it on._

_While the grill was warming Dean began cutting up potatoes and boiling them to make homemade mashed potatoes. There was stuff for a salad that he figured he’d throw together once everything was close to being done._

_The kitchen was nice, the high end appliances seemed to be well used. Dean was delirious with excitement at the stock of food the owners had and had already began planning the next few meals he’d be making. Mary had always prided herself on making sure her sons knew how to cook and it definitely paid off. Which was a big reason why Dean hated the lack of use for his own kitchen._

_He made sure the steaks were cooked to perfection, hoping that the omega didn’t like his well done. Though if he did Dean could always just throw it back on the grill. When he was done mashing the potatoes he put a huge chunk of butter in them and stirred the russets around so the yellow goodness would mix evenly. The salad was an afterthought that he didn’t plan on touching so he didn’t make too much of it for fear of wasting the leafy greens._

_Dean smiled at the two plates he made before grabbing a glass and filling it with ice water. First stop was the omega’s room._

_It had taken a little over an hour to get everything together, but Dean had planned it perfectly with the six o’clock dinner time that seemed to be a safe bet for every client he had so far._

_The plate and glass of water were balanced precariously when he knocked on the door again. This time there was no noise on the other side._

_“I’ve got your dinner so I’m going to come in.” Dean warned before opening the door carefully._

_In the middle of the bed lay a form curled in on itself underneath the covers. He could see it convulsing and the wet spot surrounding it didn’t make Dean feel any better._

_“Fuck.” He muttered before setting the dinner on the closest available surface and walking over to the bed carefully._

_“Hey man, I’m going to take care of you.” Dean murmured as he pulled the blanket back. Next thing he knew the comforter was flying and a wild eyed omega was sitting up straight as a board in the bed._

_“Don’t fucking touch me alpha.” The man spat the last word out like it was a death sentence. Dean jumped back in shock and held his hands up._

_“Whoa, easy there man, I’m not aiming to cop a feel. Just need to get you set up for dinner.” Dean said in a placating voice which did nothing to sooth the panic on the omega’s face._

_“I know what alphas like you do. You think I want your knot, well I don’t! I don’t need anything from you!” Ok, so the omega was a dick._

_“I’m not going trying knot you man, I made you some damn dinner and I need you to eat it, but first, in case you haven’t noticed, your surrounded by your slick. I just want to get you out of it.” Dean said, trying to stay calm._

_“I don’t need you to take care of me.” He said stubbornly as he glared at Dean, and damn if that look didn’t do things to him._

_Dean noticed for the first time the omega’s deep blue eyes and messy hair. The man had a chin that looked like it was chiseled out of fucking stone. The look on his face was challenging, one eyebrow raised prominently as he stared the alpha down. There was something else in those eyes, though._

_The fear was evident._

_“Alright, I’m just going to leave dinner up there,” Dean pointed towards where he left the meal. “Just... Eat it, please?” He said as he slowly backed out of the room and shut the door._

_There was no way Dean was going to force his presence on the man when he was obviously scared shitless. Not that Dean blamed him. The omega’s partner had left him behind with an unknown alpha. No matter how reputable his company was, there was always going to be someone with more than a little fear._

_Dean ate his food slowly standing at the kitchen counter as he wondered how the hell he was going to care for this man for an entire week. He started cleaning up his mess but was dismayed when it didn’t take him too long to wash the dishes from making the meal._

_When Dean was done he looked around before he found a stash of linens and the washer and dryer. He pulled out sheets and a comforter before setting them down on his bed and listening for noises behind the other door carefully._

_It felt like hours before Dean heard the start of a shower, but it was probably only minutes. When he heard the noise he snuck into the room carefully and ripped the bedding off quickly before making it up with the clean items. He took the dirty sheets and comforter to the washer and started them before putting a couple bottles of water by the bed and pulling out some clean clothes from the dresser in the room. He hoped they were the omega’s._

_Before leaving the room and shutting the door Dean grabbed the empty plate and glass from beside the bed intent on scrubbing them clean._

_When he was finally done, Dean lay in his room and stared at the ceiling. It was going to be one long week._


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks for reading.

Chapter Four

“So, you make any profit here?” Cas groaned as he listened to the conversation Gabriel was having with the owner of the small candy shop his brother had insisted they go to.

“We make enough, sure wish we had more customers like you though,” the owner stared pointedly at the three bags Gabriel had that were full of an assortment of candy. “I swear parents these days don’t let their kids have anything that’s good for them. All that non sugar propaganda has been getting to their heads.”

“Well that’s a damn shame sir. You’re a scholar and a gentleman.” Gabriel bowed to the man before walking out of the store with a wave and a big smile on his face.

“I can not believe my grown brother just dragged me into a candy store.” Cas mumbled as they walked side by side through the town.

“Believe baby bro cause we’re going to be hitting that place up on the daily.” Gabriel said with an impish grin. Cas would laugh if he thought it was a joke.

“Where’s Anna?” Cas asked, wondering where his sibling that didn’t act like a child was.

“I don’t know, said she had to get some stuff.” Gabe shrugged and dug a lollipop out of one of the bags before shoving it in his mouth.

“Hmm,” Cas hummed suspiciously to which Gabe responded with a confused look. “What? You don’t think it’s odd she disappeared on the first day here?” Gabe just shrugged.

“Figure she’s a grown woman, she can do what she wants.” Gabe answered as they turned down the street that would lead them to the home they had rented for two weeks.

“I guess.” Cas dropped the subject and walked quietly until they got to the house. The rental car was parked out front signaling Anna’s return. Cas was relieved by the sight.

When they walked into the house Cas smiled warmly at his sister. She was always the voice of reason between the three of them. Anna stood in the middle of the open plan living area with the sun shining brightly through the windows catching wisps of her red hair.

She was an omega like Cas. He often found himself jealous that she actually fit the bill. Her slight frame and loving personality made for the perfect mixture of omega. He felt like he was an odd ball when it came to his secondary gender. He was never quite able to accept what he was, though he wasn’t very tall compared to alphas, he was definitely taller than most omegas. His slim hips made it so having a pup would hard for him. As if he’d ever get the chance.

“You’re so handsome Cas.” Anna smiled and hugged him, like she could read what was going through his mind. Cas didn’t hug back like he normally would though. The overwhelming scent of something long ago forgotten invaded his sense as his sister enveloped him in the loving gesture.

Cas thought he’d forgotten the smell, but now that he could catch faint whiffs of it he saw that it was just as welcoming as it was a couple years ago.

“Cas?” Anna said curiously before he shook his head and stood away from her.

“Why do you smell like that?” Cas asked abruptly. Anna looked shocked at the question before a look of realization dawned on her face.

“I went to the store to pick up a few things, there was an alpha who helped me navigate the place,” Anna shrugged before smiling. “Which reminds me, he’s invited us to a fire on the beach, which we will be going to.” At that, she looked pointedly at Cas.

“That hardly seems safe.” Cas mumbled grumpily as he fidgeted with a non existent thread on his shirt.

“Chill out Cas, it’s a fire on the beach!” Gabe said excitedly as he set his three bags down on the couch. Anna raised her eyebrow and smirked.

“Really Gabe?” She said with a smile in her voice.

“Yes really sis. It’s not like there’s a candy shop readily available wherever I go.” He answered like the reason for the copious amount of candy was obvious. Anna just laughed and grabbed Cas’s hand.

“I got you something at the store.” She said nervously as she lead him to the table.

On it lay a wood board and bags full of supplies from a hardware store. Cas swallowed audibly as he ran his fingers along the plain plank before turning quickly towards Anna.

“What’s this for?” He asked, even though he knew the answer.

Cas used to build things before... everything. He did custom made orders of furniture and knick knacks. He made random pieces with no inspiration but a dream in his head, people seemed to like those more than the ones they thought up on their own. It had been a long time since he’d last started a project and, to be honest, he wasn’t sure if he’d ever make another piece again. The look of hope on Anna’s face told him she had other plans.

“I figured maybe you could draw inspiration from around you. It’s just stuff for a birdhouse, you know those like the back of your hand.” Anna smiled nervously as Cas went through the contents in the bags.

Sure enough, he had everything he would have needed if he actually decided to work on it. Which was probably not going to happen.

“Anna-“ Cas began before she hurriedly cut him off.

“I know Cas, you don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. I just thought maybe you’d like to have it here in case.” Something akin to anger flared up in Cas as he glared at his sister.

“Are you sure you thought I’d like to have it around? Or was this more for you and your impossible attempts to fix me?” He snapped before storming out of the room and leaving his two siblings staring after him.

_*~*_

_The morning light shone across Dean’s face from a crack in the curtains. He opened his eyes begrudgingly and cursed himself for not checking that before he went to sleep. Oh well, now was as good a time as any to wake up._

_He pulled on sweats before making his way to the kitchen and starting a pot of coffee. Dean had made sure to find the things he would need to make the elixir of life the night before. The coffee maker itself wasn’t anything to write home about, but the grounds were some fancy brand that could probably only be found at a Whole Foods store._

_Dean scoffed at the pretentiousness of them until he took a long sip from the cup and groaned. Maybe he would start investing in some good coffee for his apartment. He went back to his room and texted Benny to let him know he made through the first night. Only six more to go._

_Benny was a good guy. Had himself a nice mate named Andrea who seemed a little stand offish at times, but Dean figured it was because she was shy. The two of them were betas, which Dean found himself infinitely jealous of._

_He couldn’t explain what it was, but the thought of not being looked at like he was going to go crazy and knot any omega he happened to smell sounded oddly appealing to Dean. Of course, John had been proud when both of his boys had presented alpha, though he said he didn’t care either way. It was every father’s dream to have an alpha son. They were tall and strong, thought to be all around men, but Dean didn’t feel strong half the time. He hated the way people looked at him, hated what society presumed he should be. There were things he just couldn’t do because of his secondary gender, and he knew the same went for omegas. Betas, though, they had the best of the both worlds. Or at least that’s how he saw it._

_Dean sighed as he dialed his mom’s number, knowing that he had to get this out of the way. Mary always wanted an update from her sons, she had to know that they were alright at all times. It was a fierce type of love she felt for her pups. He knew that if she thought they were in trouble she would rip as many throats as it took to get them safely home. Omega or not, Mary Winchester was a force to be reckoned with._

_“Good morning Son.” She answered warmly. Despite himself, Dean found himself giving the faintest of smiles._

_“Hey Mom, how’s it going?” He asked as he peered around the living room._

_“Same old. Your father’s back is killing him and he refuses to go to the doctor because he doesn’t want to take time off during the busy season.” She grumbled with annoyance._

_“Doesn’t he say that about every season?”_

_“That was my argument exactly, he’s worried about leaving Bobby. I keep trying to tell him that Bobby would pissed if he found out how bad he was hurting.” Dean cringed when he thought of exactly why John had a hard time. Ever since Bobby’s accident he relied heavily on John to keep the shop up and running, but Mary wasn’t lying when she said he’d be pissed._

_“Yeah well, maybe I can get some time off and help around the shop when Dad decides it’s time to take care of himself.” Dean mumbles thinking absentmindedly about taking a vacation from work to work. He wouldn’t mind it, though, he’d always loved working with cars._

_“I’ll mention it to your dad, he might actually do it if it gets you out of doing what you do for a bit.” The thick disdain was obvious in Mary’s voice. Dean groaned and rubbed his eyes._

_“Mom, please.” Dean begged and listened as Mary sighed._

_“I’m sorry, I just wish you could find something different.” She murmured._

_“One day it will pay off.” Dean said unconvincingly to even himself._

_“Have you heard from Sam?” Mary asked, changing the subject._

_“Yeah, he’s doing good. Got eyes on a girl.” Dean said smiling._

_“Oh yes, I’ve heard.” Mary laughed._

_“It’ll do the giant good to have someone there to keep him in check.” Dean smiled and looked towards the kitchen. He startled when he noticed the scruffy figure standing with his back towards Dean filling a cup of coffee._

_“Hey Mom, I gotta go. Love you.” He said as he ended the call before he could hear what Mary had to say._

_Dean stood and watched as the omega sniffed the cup before relaxing minutely. He noticed he still couldn’t scent the heat on the man, indicating he had some high powered blockers._

_When the omega turned towards Dean he stopped in his tracks and stood as still as humanly possible._

_*_

_Cas stood stock still in the kitchen as he appraised the alpha in his living. He had to admit, if just a little bit, that the man was attractive. His features were strong and the smattering of freckles across his face were endearing._

_If it weren’t for the situation, Cas would think he was the most attractive man he’d laid eyes on. As it were, though, he was just frightened of what the man’s next move was._

_He cursed himself for not being able to resist the smell of coffee. He cursed himself for thinking he could sneak out of his room while the man was talking. He cursed himself for not noticing that the man had ended the conversation._

_The alpha began slowly moving towards Cas, his hands held up in a placating manner. He inched along to the counter, keeping the barrier between himself and Cas. It was a calculated move, one meant to show him that the alpha meant no harm._

_Unfortunately, it did little to stave off the fear bubbling under Cas’s surface. He knew what alphas did to omegas in heat. He’d heard many horror stories of omegas being mated against their will because some alpha couldn’t keep their knot to themselves. Cas didn’t want to be one of those stories._

_He wondered idly if he could beat the man to his room, though he figured that running wouldn’t be a good solution. Instead, Cas continued to stand still while holding the cup coffee that he actively hated right now._

_“How’d you sleep?” The timbre of the alpha’s voice filled the quiet living space. Cas closed his eyes momentarily as he felt the rush of slick come out of him. Why must his body respond this way?_

_The alpha waited several moments for an answer he wasn’t going to get before sighing and rubbing his face in frustration._

_“Seriously? You gonna be a dick all week?” Cas stifled a growl at the insult before fixing the man with a glare._

_“You could just go home and you won’t have to deal with it.” Cas offered angrily. The alpha just laughed before giving Cas a helpless look._

_“You and I both know that’s a breach of contract.” It was Cas’s turn to roll his eyes._

_“Oh please, like you wouldn’t enjoy a paid week off, knot head.” And that was the final straw._

_Cas watched as the man went rigid, his chest puffed out (how the hell did Cas miss that he wasn’t wearing a shirt?) and his face took on an angry look._

_“First of all, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this but I haven’t tried shit with you. Believe me the last thing I want to do is knot some omega dick. Second, please do us both a favor and quit being so fucking miserable. I’m here for a week whether you like it or not, so get over it.” The alpha said glaring at Cas._

_“I don’t want you in my home.” Cas said petulantly. He tried to show anger, but he knew the alpha had seen the fear shine through Cas’s carefully built facade the night before. He could only imagine what kind of power trip that gave the guy._

_Though there were things that Cas found surprising. Like the fact that the alpha had left the room almost immediately when Cas asked him to last night. The clean bedding was another shock to his system when he made his way out of the shower. As well as the clean clothes, though they had been Balthazar’s, the thought was not lost on Cas. The alpha was also using scent blockers pretty heavily, which was nice._

_Deep down, though, Cas knew this man was trouble. He couldn’t say why, but he just had a feeling that something bad was going to happen._

_“I got that, but here I am anyways. I’m just here to take care of you, man, in whatever way you see fit. So if you don’t want a knot I’m not going to force mine on you,” the alpha sighed as he looked pleadingly at Cas. “But I saw that slick last night, I know you’ve got it bad. So just let me make sure you’re cared for in every other way. Just let me make sure you have food and company. Please.” The alpha was pleading at this point, something that shocked Cas. What he was saying rang true, Cas wouldn’t be able to care for himself. Soon he’d go into delirium and he would be lucky if he was sane enough to take one sip of water._

_Cas sighed and looked dejectedly at the floor. He found himself annoyed, not for the first time, that he had to present as a damn omega._

_“Ok. But if you so much as try to touch me in any untoward way I’ll hurt you.” At that the man loosens and smiles. His deep laugh echoing in Cas’s bones._

_“Well I don’t doubt that for one second. I’m Dean, by the way.” Dean said smiling sheepishly at Cas from under his long eyelashes._

_“My name is Cas.”_


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! I love all the comments and kudos, you guys are amazing!

Chapter Five

Dean walked around the house buzzing with excitement. Charlie and Dorothy would be pulling their rental car into his driveway any minute now.

It hadn’t been too long since he’d seen them, but the months in between felt like years sometimes. With him visiting home when he could and his house being in prime vacation destination, Dean got to see his family and friends more often than most. This would be the fourth time in two years that Charlie and Dorothy came to visit him. This time was a little different than the others, though.

Dorothy told him her plans to propose to Charlie on the beach under the setting sun months before and Dean had been all for it. Sure, the pair were mated, but that didn’t make the desire for marriage any less. He knew that he would be a blubbering fool when Charlie’s face undoubtedly lit up with glee when she sees the ring her better half got her.

It was the kind of grand romantic gesture that simultaneously warmed Dean’s heart while making him feel like it was being ripped out of his chest at the same time.

Dean tried not to think about what, or rather who, he was missing in his life. After running into the woman at the store yesterday, though, he’d been thinking of Cas non stop.

He’d learned that the woman’s name was Anna and she was here on vacation with her two brothers. From the sounds of it one was a ball of energy who acted like a child and the other was clinically depressed. When Dean invited her to the fire he was having tonight he told himself it was because he’d made a new friend. He didn’t know who he thought he was fooling.

Truth was, the faint smell of Cas on her had been intoxicating. Dean wanted to be around the lingering scent more. He’d spent the last two years painfully forgetting the whole reason he ran from Lawrence in the first place and all it took was a half hour of shopping with Anna to bring it all crashing down.

He pictured the blue eyes he could get lost in and the deep voice that sent shivers down his spine, and the hard planes of a body he’d spent hours memorizing. He craved the warm touch of big strong hands. Dean saw the joyous smile that morphed a somber face into one of a carefree man. It was all he could think about.

The only good thing about the whole situation was that Charlie would be there in a few minutes to help him remember why it wasn’t healthy to obsess over the memories. The moments of fake love with an omega who wasn’t in their right mind. Cas had made that very clear the last time they saw each other.

  
“Honey I’m home!” As if in on cue, Charlie sung the words as she barged through the front door with her arms wide open and a smile on her face.

“Charles.” Dean said stoically before he let the stupid grin take over his face and wrapped her in a bear hug.

“Oh my god, you will not believe the shit show of a flight we were just on.” Charlie rolled her eyes as she grabbed Dean’s hand and led him out to the back porch over looking the ocean.

“Umm, don’t you have bags?” Dean asked with eyes raised as she plopped down in one of his wicker chairs.

“Dean, that’s what I have a big strong alpha for.” She smiled as Dean rolled his eyes and laughed.

“Never thought I’d hear you say those words.” Dean said as he heard the front door shut.

“Oh yes, haven’t you heard Dean? Charlie has become a regular old house omega.” Dorothy said as she glared at Charlie with humor.

“Hey Dorothy.” Dean greeted as he hugged the other woman and motioned for her to sit down.

“For reals though, I was sitting in the middle of Dottie here and some big ole beta. Dude would not quit farting!” Charlie exclaimed with disgust as she thought of their flight.

“It’s a natural reaction for the body, Charlie.” Dorothy scolded.

“I’m getting real sick and tired of you going Nurse Jackie on me.” Charlie glared back. All Dean could do was laugh as he listened to the couple bicker back and forth.

*~*

_Cas sat at the counter and watched as Dean made pancakes, eggs and bacon. He was at awe with the ease the alpha moved around the kitchen with. He wondered idly where Dean had learned how to cook._

_For the most part Cas did the cooking around the apartment. Balthazar had complained about having to work such long hours and then come home to cook when Cas got to set his own workdays. That one had been a particularly fun fight._

_Cas had accused Zar of insinuating that he didn’t work enough, which the other man vehemently denied. Truth was Cas worked his ass off. The shop that he owned down the street always had some form of a project going on. He was “in demand” as Meg liked to say._

_His custom made furniture was a huge hit in Lawrence and the surrounding areas. Cas had even received a request from buyers on the East Coast for a grand table with matching chairs that would seat twelve people. He had been particularly proud of that one._

_His hands were always dry and his body ached, but he loved it and more often than not put in ten to thirteen hour days. Which was why it made Cas so angry that Balthazar would whine about making a damn meal every once in a while._

_In the end, though, Cas had conceded, much to Meg’s disapproval. She had told him that Zar was trying to turn him into the perfect omega mate without actually mating him. He denied the accusation even though he definitely felt that way at times._

_“Cas?” He startled out of his thoughts and looked up at Dean. The alpha had an expectant look on his face as if he was waiting for an answer. Cas blushed deeply before looking at the counter._

_“I’m sorry, what was that?” Cas mumbled as he kept his eyes trained on the specks in the granite surface._

_“Just wondering how you like your bacon?” Dean asked again with a comforting tone. Cas dared to peek up and saw that the man was smiling at him with nothing but kindness._

_“Just a little crispy, please.” Cas answered and Dean’s face lit up._

_“I knew there was a reason I liked you.” Dean teased before going back to the task at hand._

_“Sorry.” Cas said before he could stop himself. Dean looked up again with a questioning look._

_“Hmm?” He made the noise as he went about flipping one of the pancakes._

_“For not hearing you. Balthazar says I, uh, I get lost my own little world too often.” Oh god. Why the hell was he still talking?_

_“Well,” Dean shrugged his shoulders as he plated another pancake. “You’ve got to make sure it’s still in order right?”_

_*_

_Dean couldn’t place it, but there was something so fucking melancholy about Cas. The dude had spent two hours outside of his room and the whole time Dean never saw him smile once. He wondered why he was so sad?_

_As far as Dean could tell, it seemed like Cas had the perfect life. Well almost perfect. Dean didn’t miss the many framed photos of the omega with another man hanging around the apartment walls. He also didn’t miss the definite lack of a bite mark on Cas. Not that the man was running around shirtless, but he was continually fighting with the v neck of the shirt Dean had laid out the night before. There was definitely not a mate’s bite where it would normally be._

_Dean knew that most of the perfect was just on the surface, but he wondered if what was underneath was truly hard enough to make Cas so sad. He also supposed he’d never get the chance to know._

_Even though Cas seemed to be warming up to him a little, there was still a very definitive wall there blocking Dean from actually getting to know the guy. They’d talked briefly about hobbies but other than that there had been no conversation._

_Once he’d eaten breakfast, Cas had shut himself back in his room. Dean knew that the omega was undoubtedly laying in his bed shaking with heat, but he couldn’t do anything about it. Cas had made it very clear that he didn’t want Dean to touch him and why that disappointed the alpha so much was something he could dissect later. Much later._

_Dean spent the rest of the morning reading a book he brought along. He was barely comprehending the words on the page when he first heard Cas wailing._

_He tried to ignore it and was doing so successfully until the whimpers and groans grew much louder. Dean laid the book down for a second and contemplated what he should do._

_Before he could stop himself, Dean found his way to the door leading into Cas’s bedroom. He knocked tentatively before opening it and peering in._

_Cas was laying on top of all the bedding stark naked. He was writhing in pain as slick leaked out of his ass. The fact that he still couldn’t smell the omega’s heat drove Dean mad but he wasn’t going to think about that either. Now all he was going to think about was helping Cas._

_“Where’s your toys?” Dean asked gruffly as he made sure to keep space between him and the bed, not wanting to scare Cas._

_“Wha-“ Cas barely got out before he doubled over in pain, his body twisting in on itself._

_“Your toys, Cas, you’ve got to have something. A dildo or knot?” Dean said hurriedly and was relieved when Cas pointed towards a door in the room._

_Dean walked over to it quickly and yanked it open revealing a large walk in closet. Towards the back sitting on the floor was a shoebox. Dean went straight to it, hoping that it contained what he was looking for._

_When Dean opened the lid it revealed a small collection of sex toys that he was only mildly jealous of. Instead of contemplating what Cas used them for he went straight for the first fake knot he saw, which also happened to be the biggest._

_“Use this.” Dean said as he tossed the knot by Cas before turning quickly and leaving the room._

_The closed door did nothing to keep the needy gasps and moans hidden._

_It was hours before Dean could calm himself down enough to go check on the omega. He’d had to take a cold shower like a fucking teenager after he’d heard Cas cry out in the throes of orgasm._

_Dean didn’t know what was going on. He’d never gotten this worked up over a job before and found himself wondering if it was because he’d always been able to find release of his own. Sure, he primarily offered comfort to the omega clients he’d had before, but he was always getting action of his own. Always able to sink his knot into the wet tight holes of those omegas he cared for._

_That was the only explanation for Dean having to jack off in the shower, because the freezing water did nothing to quell his arousal._

_“Hey Cas?” Dean asked tentatively before opening the door. Cas was still laying on the bed and while the comforter was covered in slick and there was a thin sheen of sweat on the omega’s body, he looked a lot better than he had when Dean came in earlier._

_Cas groaned and threw his arm over his face. His body flushed red with embarrassment. Dean smiled at the act and approached the bed carefully before grabbing the empty water bottles and trying not to look at the slick covered knot on the bedside table._

_“I was thinking of eating, what do you want for dinner?” Dean asked as threw the bottles away in the trash by the bed._

_“A serving of dignity?” Cas huffed out as he wrapped himself in the comforter._

_“Ain’t nobody judging here. But you do need to eat.” Dean said earnestly._

_“I don’t want you to have to cook for me again.” Cas said as he looked up at Dean from the middle of his bed._

_“Well, in that case, I have an idea.” Dean left the room and returned ten minutes later with two large bowls of cereal._

_Dean ignored the way his heart beat out of control when Cas smiled up at him with true glee. He also ignored the swell of happiness he felt when the omega patted a dry spot on the bed indicating Dean should eat with him._

_“We look like children.” Cas laughed as Dean took a big spoon full of fruity pebbles and shoved it in his mouth._

_“I don’t know about you, but my mom would never let me eat cereal in bed.” Dean joked and watched as Cas gave him another smile that transformed his face._

_“Yeah, I guess you’re right on that one,” they sat quietly as they continued eating, the only noise was the clank of the spoons as they hit the bowls. “Does your family know?” Cas asked quietly._

_Dean looked over at him, contemplating what he meant before realization dawned on him. He’d never had a client ask him about his personal life and he wasn’t sure how to answer the question. The only thing Dean knew is that he never wanted to see anything but that beautiful smile on Cas’s face again._

_“Yeah, never were too happy with it, but they know.” Dean said before he could come up with a lie._

_“Why do you do it?” The omega asked the question with a genuine look of curiosity._

_“Don’t know really. It pays the bills and keeps me living comfortably I guess.” Dean shrugged and spooned another mouthful._

_“Hmm, I’ve always wondered what could drive a person to be a companion.” Cas said thoughtfully._

_“Well it’s got nothing to do with the sex, for me at least, and everything to do with the money,” Dean sighed and looked at the comforter. “I guess I like taking care of people, too. Just isn’t the way I’d imagined I would be doing that when I was growing up.”_

_“What would you rather be doing?” Cas asked staring at Dean with imploring eyes. There was something disconcerting about the gaze, like Cas was staring straight into Dean’s soul. The alpha shifted nervously before clearing his throat._

_“I don’t know. I, uh, well I always liked working with my hands,” Dean smiled and chuckled quietly at the absurdity of the statement. “I’m good at fixing things. Only thing is I grew up watching my dad fixing things, well cars. They.. struggled. A lot. To keep food on the table. I just never wanted to struggle like that.” Cas looked at him thoughtfully before swallowing a mouthful of cereal._

_“You don’t suppose that, even though they were struggling, they were happy?” Cas asked._

_Dean found himself at a loss for words. He was already giving more of a story to this man than he normally would, and he felt raw. It was like being put on an examining table._

_“I don’t know man, I know they loved us. Gave us everything they could, but they were always struggling to make ends meet at the end of the day. Had to be stressful.”_

_“I’m sure it was, but I also think there’s something to be said about the ‘struggle’,” Cas air quoted and Dean had a hard time controlling the goofy grin he felt right under the surface. “It’s beautiful, really, when you think about it. Maybe they had hard a time making ends meet, but they did it all for love.”_

_Dean didn’t know how to respond, it was a perspective he’d never thought to look at. He just remembered the years of Mary and John frantically trying to pay past due bills while keeping enough food on the table for two growing boys. Sure he knew they were doing it out of love, but he’d always thought it was more out of responsibility than anything._

_“I guess.” Dean said quietly to acknowledge that he’d at least heard what the other man said._

_They ate the rest of their cereal in comfortable silence before Dean changed out Cas’s bedding again and retired to his room for the night._


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning: this chapter is smutty. Dean and Cas finally run into each other in the present day as well.
> 
> Next week will be a busy one, I’m going on vacation and college will be back in session. The joys of online classes is that I can do homework while enjoying a view of the ocean. I don’t know if I’ll be posting regularly next week, though I will definitely try. I’m thinking the ocean will add to my inspiration for this work.
> 
> As always thank you so much for reading. The comments and kudos are amazing and I appreciate each one you!

Chapter Six

Cas trudged along behind Anna and Gabe as they talked excitedly about going to a bon fire on the beach. He didn’t understand what the big fuss was about, it was just a damn fire, they could have built one themselves. Unfortunately for Cas, though, his siblings were much more social than he was. He supposed the idea of making friends was what most appealed to them.

He’d tried to beg his way out of it. He’d even feigned stomach issues that neither Gabe nor Anna were buying. So instead of staying in and reading, like he’d wanted to do, he found himself going to some stranger’s house with a twelve pack of craft beer in tow.

“We’re going to be here for two weeks, might as well make some friends. Besides, he told me he had some visitors coming and it’s going to be a big welcome party for them. We’re not going to be the only ones who don’t know anyone.” Anna had told him comfortingly before they walked out the door. Cas took no comfort from that at all.

“Cassie, bro, wanna quit dragging your feet like the big party pooper you are?” Gabe asked with grin as he and Anna waited for Cas to catch up to them.

“I still don’t see why I had to go.” He grumbled, Gabe frowned at him before procuring a chocolate from his pocket and popping it into his mouth.

“Because Cas, sometimes we do things in life that make us uncomfortable. It’s called living.” Gabe said sarcastically before grabbing the pack of beer from Cas’s hand and walking off.

“Oh! This is it, he said to just go through the back gate and they would be there.” Anna said excitedly.

There was that damn scent again. It was driving Cas wild even though it was faint. The smell of the ocean and grass subdued it but not enough for Cas’s liking.

He’d dreamt of Dean the night before after smelling even the faintest reminder of the alpha on Anna. Cas could see his face as clear as day, his head thrown back in easy laughter that seemed to move his whole body. He remembered vividly reaching out to touch the man in his dreams before Dean’s face morphed. Hurt and rejection etched into every lovely feature on the alpha’s face. It was the last expression Cas had seen on the beautiful man.

He’d had countless dreams just like it. A constant reminder that he had been the one who put that expression on Dean’s face. Cas had been having them less, but he wasn’t sure if he was happy about it. Even if it was a constant reminder of his biggest mistake, he still got to see the man.

He’d spent two years trying to track him down, but there was nothing. It was like Dean had just disappeared. Cas tried not to think about the fact that the alpha truly didn’t disappear, he’d just left. The alpha didn’t want to see him, and for that Cas could only blame himself.

Even if Cas could somehow find him, he had no clue what he would say to Dean. He’d practiced speeches and how he would apologize numerous times, but the truth was it would never be enough to take back the hurt that he’d caused.

They made their way through the mysterious man’s lawn and walked onto the beach where they could see the fire going. There was a large group of people milling about and though Cas and his siblings were obviously strangers they were still welcomed with big smiles.

Anna and Gabe instantly loved the crowd, they introduced themselves and started chatting with whoever was interested. Cas found himself wishing it was that easy for him to make friends. Instead he stood on the outskirts of the group and watched as people laughed and talked between themselves.

“Hey, why so serious?” Cas looked up and noticed a red head walking towards him with a stern face.

“I, uh, don’t like crowds.” It wasn’t a lie, he’d never been a fan of surrounding himself with people.

“Well, crowds don’t like you.” The lady stuck her tongue out at Cas before smiling at him. She seemed very at ease with the fact that she was teasing an absolute stranger.

“Ok.” Cas drew the word out and shifted uncomfortably before the woman held a beer out to him. He took it with appreciation, he could tell he was going to need to liquid motivation with how this was how the night was starting.

“Who you here with, crowd hater?” She asked easily.

“My brother and sister, they’re around here somewhere.” On cue Anna emerged smiling widely at Cas. She grabbed his hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

“Nuh uh! You’re sister is the other token red head?” Anna smiled and laughed at the other woman as she offered her hand.

“I’m Anna, and I’m presuming he hasn’t introduced himself yet, so this is Cas.” Anna said looking towards her brother with affection.

“Charlie, or Queen if you would rather,” Charlie winked and laughed before continuing. “And you’re right, we skipped the names and went straight for awkward flirting.” Cas turned bright red and looked at his sister with horrified eyes.

“Oh did you now?” Anna asked with a raised eyebrow, clearly knowing that her brother would do no such thing.

“Yeah, I just don’t have the heart to tell him that I swing the other way.” Charlie said as another woman walked towards them.

“Or that you’re mated. Come on Charlie, quit making the poor man uncomfortable.” The woman said as she wrapped her arm around Charlie’s waist.

“Oh yeah, this is my worse half, Dorothy.” Charlie got an annoyed glare from Dorothy for that.

“I’m going to start introducing you as my psychotic stalker.” Dorothy said, which got a laugh from both Charlie and Anna.

“Don’t let her fool you, she loves me.” Charlie winked before Dorothy led her back to the crowd. Cas watched as Charlie popped up and waved at he and Anna before disappearing.

He wondered idly about Dorothy. Cas could swear he’d seen the woman before but couldn’t quite pin point where. He didn’t think on it long before Anna was dragging him towards the crowd too.

“C’mon Cas, I want you to meet the host.” Anna said graciously as she led Cas into the crowd.

The further they went the more Cas could smell the scent. He felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up while his skin became clammy with sweat. Before long it was like he was hitting a brick wall of mahogany, leather, and whiskey. It was intoxicating, just as good as he remembered it, if not better.

It took what felt like years for them to break through the crowd and come upon the back of a man who was talking easily with Gabe.

The bowed legs, strong shoulders, and long neck were more familiar to Cas than anything. He’d spent hours worshipping that body. He would recognize it anywhere.

The man went stiff as Anna said something Cas couldn’t comprehend. He turned slowly and the minute Cas locked eyes on the sea of green it was like the world stopped. Nothing and no one else mattered as Cas saw the face that tortured him and his every move for the past two years.

“Dean?” Cas asked quietly. Anna and Gabe were staring at the exchange curiously. Charlie and Dorothy had appeared from nowhere as they watched as well. Not that Cas would have known, his eyes were only on the man before him.

Cas knew that he should say something. Get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness, promise Dean whatever the alpha wanted as long as he gave him another chance, but he couldn’t. He was rooted to the spot he was in and couldn’t will his body to move or his mouth to talk.

Cas watched as Dean let the glass bottle he was holding hit the sand, it made a subdued thud when it landed. There was now a large group of people peering at them with curiosity written across their faces.

Dean stared at Cas wide eyed for long moments before he turned back around quickly. Cas cursed his body, wishing he could find it in him to move, but it was no use. Dean’s long strides led him up the beach towards his house with a confused Charlie running after him calling his name.

Cas listened as the sound of the door slamming shut drowned out the crackle of the fire and the lapping of the waves. Everyone, including his siblings, were staring at him. All Cas wanted to do was dig a hole and crawl into it.

*~*

_Dean watched the western movie from the vantage point of the kitchen. It was noon and Cas had yet to emerge from his room. He wasn’t worried though, he’d been to check on the omega numerous times and had force fed him an omelette that morning. It seemed like the unbreakable omega was finally breaking._

_Cas had whined and moaned the whole time Dean had been feeding him that morning. He talked senselessly as he tried to hold himself together. Dean wasn’t proud to admit that the sight of the delirious omega presenting himself for the fake knot without warning had made the blood in his veins feel like fire._

_Dean couldn’t figure him out. He could tell that the omega had rough heats from the amount of slick that was pouring out of him, but somehow Cas was still somewhat holding it together. He supposed it was because of the lack of scents. Or maybe the lack of the right scent._

_Dean was throwing together a pasta dish when he heard the shower turn on. Cas must have felt good enough to clean himself, which was another thing most omegas didn’t have the mind to do while in heat. None of it made sense to him, how could the man be so controlled when the chemicals of his body were going haywire?_

_Dean finished cooking and grabbed a bowl for himself. The shower was still going so he figured he’d leave Cas alone about eating for a while and let the man have some peace. God knows Dean needed it after the little show he’d gotten earlier._

_When he was finished eating, Dean cleaned up his mess in the kitchen and walked into his room. He stood in there looking around aimlessly before deciding to shower himself._

_He took his time, letting the hot water and high pressure beat down on his sore back. Dean had always loved a good shower and was already trying to figure out where he could find a shower head like the one in this bathroom for his apartment._

_Soon Dean was lathering his body as he sang out a Zeppelin song. He was just getting to the good part when he heard a crash outside the door followed by a disgruntled moan. Dean hurried and washed the soap off his body before wrapping a towel around his waist, not even bothering to dry off._

_“Cas?” He said worriedly when he yanked open the bathroom door and found the omega sprawled on the floor in the hallway buck ass naked._

_Maybe if he hadn’t been so worried about seeing Cas laying helplessly on the floor he would have noticed the lack of blockers. As it were, though, Dean rushed towards the omega and picked him up bridal style, intent on carrying him back to his room._

_Maybe if he hadn’t been so side tracked over the hard planes of Cas’s body, Dean would have noticed the omega burying his nose into his throat and breathing deeply. As it were, though, Dean was too busy fussing over Cas leaving the room without telling him._

_It wasn’t until Dean heard a deep moan of pleasure from the omega and the smell of fresh slick that the alpha actually realized that suddenly he was smelling something altogether intoxicating._

_The scent of old tomes, freshly cut grass, and the ocean invaded his senses. Dean couldn’t stop the low growl in his throat even if he wanted to._

_“Fuck.” Dean bit out before trying to lay Cas down on his bed and leave. The omega held tightly and pulled Dean against him as Cas buried his nose right in the alpha’s throat._

_*_

_Cas let a deep moan as he held Dean tightly to his body. His scent was so powerful that the omega found himself whimpering with delight as slick came out of ass._

_“Mine.” Cas growled as he licked a stripe from the bottom Dean’s throat up to his ear and bit lightly at the alpha’s lobe._

_Dean groaned deeply as he tried to disentangle himself from Cas. He couldn’t let that happen, wasn’t going to let this man go. Cas tightened his arms around Dean’s neck and began nipping at the skin on his neck, chin, and ears with a sort of frenzied abandon he’d never felt before._

_“Cas, oh god, you have to stop.” Dean pleaded, but Cas could feel him responding to the small bites he was peppering all of the alpha. There was no sense to the movements he was making, everything was hurried and sloppy as Cas bucked his bare hips up against the alpha’s covered groin._

_“No.” Cas bit out, frustrated by the offending towel that kept him from his alpha’s knot._

_Cas wanted to wrap himself in Dean, wanted to know what their scents would smell like mixed together. He wanted the alpha’s knot buried deep inside him as he screamed with pleasure._

_“Mine.” Cas said again as he buried his hand into Dean’s hair and pulled him down for a bruising kiss._

_At first Dean didn’t respond, which frustrated the hell out of Cas. So the omega wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist and pushed down so their groins were together, separated only by that fucking towel. As Cas began rolling his hips up he wrapped his arm around the alpha’s strong shoulders, the fistful of Dean’s hair still held tightly in his other. Cas broke their lips apart to bite at the alpha’s bottom lip._

_“Oh fu- fuck.” Dean bit out as he began kissing Cas back._

_Cas felt his inner omega preening at the rough kiss, their lips melted together as their teeth crashed. Dean placed his forearms on either side of Cas’s head and framed his face as he buckled down and began grinding against the omega._

_“Fuck, you smell so good.” Dean said as he pulled away from Cas’s lips and buried his nose right against the omega’s scent gland. Cas mirrored the movement and inhaled deeply causing Dean to groan again._

_Cas was delirious off the scent of leather, mahogany, and whiskey. There was a small, semi sane, part of him that wondered if he smelled this good to Dean. He’d never scented anything like it before, and he was sure he’d never smell anything like it ever again._

_“Mine.” Was all Cas could say again, the only word he seemed able to form, as he let one hand trail down Dean’s strong back and pull the towel off. He gasped at how thick his alpha was, his knot already forming._

_Cas reached down greedily and began pumping Dean’s thick cock. When the alpha shivered with pleasure above him, Cas pulled their mouths back together and began running his tongue along the seam of Dean’s lips._

_Dean opened his mouth, his tongue hungrily colliding with Cas’s as their cocks moved together with the rhythm of their thrusts._

_Cas had no thoughts except mate, knot, and Dean. He needed the alpha’s knot yesterday and all he could think about now was the feel of being stretched out. Dean leaned on one arm as he grabbed both of their dicks in one hand and began stroking them together. It wasn’t enough._

_“Please Dean, need it. Need your knot.” Cas said hungrily as he tried to bat Dean’s hand away so he could roll over and present. The alpha didn’t budge, just shook his head and bore all his weight down on Cas._

_“W-want to Cas, but no.” Dean said resolutely. Cas cried out in agony. His alpha didn’t want him. He didn’t want to knot him, just like Zar didn’t want to mate him._

_“No.” Cas said with a frustrated cry as Dean kissed his face all over._

_Cas tried hiding his face in the pillow, but Dean wouldn’t let him. He placed his hand on Cas’s jaw and pulled his face so they were looking into each other’s eyes. There was something so tender in those green eyes and it made Cas melt._

_“M’gonna take care of you.” Dean said with a look of want on his face. Cas stared into his eyes for what felt like forever before nodding his head. Dean looked so relieved as he smiled sweetly down at Cas._

_“Ok.” Cas said quietly, trusting Dean completely._

_“I’ll take care of you.” He repeated again as he leaned over and grabbed the toy knot from Cas’s bedside table._

_“Want yours.” Cas whined as Dean shook his head and dipped his fingers just barely into Cas’s hole. It was a feather light touch, just enough to drive the omega mad. He cried out in frustration as Dean used Cas’s slick to coat the toy._

_Once the toy was covered to Dean’s liking, he laid it back down and began kissing Cas with a wild abandon. His tongue thrust into the omega’s mouth as he wrapped his hand around their dicks again and began thrusting into his fist. Dean pulled on Cas’s hair and bit his collarbone lightly._

_Cas moaned at the sharp pain that brought him pleasure, causing a whole new wave of slick. His rejection temporarily forgotten as Dean continued to nip all the way down his body._

_Cas watched as Dean licked the v of his hips that lead to his dick before licking at the omega’s tip teasingly. He swallowed it before popping off, all the while staring at Cas with a hunger in his eyes that the omega had never seen on anyone touching him before._

_He watched with rapt attention as Dean took his whole dick down to the bottom and swallowed around it before hollowing his cheeks and sucking it up and down quickly. Cas couldn’t keep his eyes off of Dean’s bobbing head and soon felt the starting of butterflies in his stomach. The deep desire and need to cum rooted itself in the omega’s core as he began crying out and thrusting into Dean’s mouth._

_The alpha didn’t seem to mind his size, or the fact that Cas was fucking his face. In fact, Dean was moaning around his cock with pleasure. Zar had never liked sucking Cas off, even when he was painfully conscious of not letting his hips move of their own accord. He’d said that Cas was too big for an omega and it made it impossible to give him head._

_All thoughts of Balthazar were erased when Cas felt Dean’s finger slip easily into his own hole. He moaned when Dean immediately stuck a second finger in and began pumping in and out as he continued to suck his cock._

_“Oh fuck, Dean, oh fuck.” Cas said breathlessly as he began thrusting his hips up and down, his body unable to decide which sensation it wanted more._

_“That’s right Cas. Fuck yourself baby.” Dean growled when he popped off of Cas’s dick and placed a third finger into his hole._

_Cas began thrusting down on Dean’s fingers as the alpha stuck an arm behind Cas’s neck and pulled him forward for a searing kiss. He could taste his own pre cum on Dean’s tongue, and there was something so filthy and exciting about it that he began whimpering._

_When Dean pulled his fingers out Cas cried out at the loss. He watched raptly as Dean licked them clean one by one before licking into Cas’s mouth again. When he pulled away they were both out of breath and panting, but unable to look away from each other._

_“Present for Omega.” Dean ordered, rough and low. This was an alpha’s command and Cas felt himself slick again at the authority in the man’s voice._

_He hurriedly got on his hands and knees, making sure his ass was up in the air. Dean bent down, one hand on Cas’s ass and the other holding the fake knot, before licking deep into the omega’s hole._

_“Oh fuck, Alpha.” Cas moaned breathlessly as Dean groaned._

_“Taste so fucking good.” Dean said to himself before biting Cas’s ass cheek and shoving the fake knot in his hole._

_Cas cried out as Dean began thrusting the toy into him with abandon. His hand snaked around Cas’s waist and started pumping his dick up and down._

_“Yes, Alpha.” Cas hissed when Dean plastered himself against Cas’s back and starting placing open mouth kisses all over it._

_It didn’t take Cas long to feel the impending orgasm come to the surface. Dean had him in such a frenzy that he wasn’t even truly expecting it._

_“C’mon, fucking cum.” Dean demanded in his alpha voice again and Cas’s body obeyed._

_He convulsed around the toy as he shot his cum all over the comforter and Dean’s hand. Cas couldn’t hear what the alpha was saying over his own heart beat, just knew that he was praising him in some way or another._

_Everything was still for a moment before Dean carefully rolled Cas onto his back and into a dry spot on the bed. When he slipped the knot out of his hole, Cas cried out at the loss but was more than happy when Dean began lapping at his dick to clean it._

_Once he had it clean to his liking, Dean moved up Cas’s body and kissed him slow and deep. It was like he was worshipping the omega for giving him this moment. Cas shivered at the thought before flipping them around._

_Dean went easily so he was laying on his back while Cas straddled him. The omega crawled down Dean’s body and took his thick dick into his mouth without preamble._

_“Oh god, Cas.” Dean moaned in surprise as Cas tried to take all of him in at once. He couldn’t._

_So instead Cas settled for bobbing up and down on Dean’s dick and wrapping his hand around the knot that was about to pop._

_Dean placed his hand on Cas’s head before taking it away quickly, unsure whether or not he would like that. The omega took his hand off Dean’s knot momentarily so he could balance himself while wrapping his fingers tentatively around the alpha’s hand. He pulled the offending hand until it was resting in his hair before going back to squeezing the knot._

_Dean got the picture._

_He grabbed a handful of Cas’s hair and began guiding him up and down his dick. Dean was trembling underneath the ministration of Cas’s mouth._

_“Yes.. Yes Cas.. Oh fuck.” Dean moaned as Cas ran his tongue along the thick vein on the bottom of his dick before going back to sucking him off._

_“Cas.. Stop, m’gonna cum.” Dean mumbled as he tried to move out from under Cas’s mouth, but the omega just doubled down and began sucking harder until the alpha cried out with a strangled moan, pumping his cum into the other man’s eager mouth._

_Cas pulled off with a pop and licked Dean clean before climbing back up the alpha’s chest and kissing him. There was no hurry or need behind it. Just slow and deep as they came down from their orgasms._

_After what felt like hours Dean began shifting Cas off of him. The omega felt a pang of panic deep in his stomach. His alpha was leaving him._

_“Dean, please, stay with me.” Cas said as Dean looked at him and sighed. The omega could see a war of emotions across the other man’s face before he smiled sadly and nodded his head._

_“Yeah, ok Cas, just gotta get you fed and in clean sheets.” Cas filed the emotion on Dean’s face away carefully before standing up and helping him make the bed with new sheets._

_By the time the bed was made up and they ate, it was dark outside. Cas curled up to Dean and scented him as they fell asleep._

_When Cas woke up alone in his bed he didn’t even think twice about wrapping the comforter around him and walking to the guest room. He wasn’t awake enough to remember that this was supposed to be a companion’s safe place, and even if he was he couldn’t say that he’d care._

_Cas opened the door to find Dean reading a book. When the alpha looked up he smiled at Cas with what could only be described as genuine happiness before throwing the covers back and letting the omega curl into his side._

_Cas could feel Dean breathing his scent in once they’d got settled in with the lights out. He also felt the faintest brushing of lips against his cheek before his world went dark._

_He would file that away for later too._


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for patience! Hope you enjoy this chapter and the next one should be up shortly.

Chapter Seven

“Hey, you gonna tell me exactly what the hell just happened out there?” Charlie exclaimed as Dean paced around his kitchen.

It made no sense to him that the man he’d been running from had just appeared in his back yard. Of course Dean had smelled him, the scent was strong as soon as Anna arrived, but he didn’t think twice about it until the scent was hitting him like a ton of bricks and he was staring into those eyes that his memory did no justice.

Dean peeked out the window and saw Cas standing on the beach in what seemed to be a heated conversation between him and his siblings. Fuck the man was beautiful.

He had to fight to keep himself from wrapping his arms around Cas. Instead of doing what every instinct inside him said to do, Dean had taken off for his home. His safe haven. Because no matter how badly he wanted to just hold the omega, he knew he couldn’t. He knew that his heart couldn’t take it, he knew that if he saw that dick Balthazar he wouldn’t be able to control himself. Not again. And the other alpha had to be lurking around somewhere, he was Cas’s mate after all.

“Dean.” Charlie said sternly, snapping him out of deep thought.

“What?” Dean asked with a lost voice. Charlie sighed and glared at back at him.

“What happened out there?” She asked tenderly as she approached Dean and grabbed his shoulders, making him halt his movements.

“That’s... uh, that’s him. That’s the omega.” Suddenly Charlie’s face became morphed with a protective anger as she turned swiftly and went back towards the door. Thankfully Dorothy had come in and blocked the exit.

“Let me out Dot, I’m going to kick his fucking ass.” Charlie growled low and menacing. Dorothy held her ground and put a hand up to Charlie’s shoulder.

“No, I’m not going to let you do that.” She said with a placating voice.

“If you don’t move-“ Charlie started before Dorothy fixed her with a glare.

“There’s something more important going on.” Dorothy said before looking pointedly at Dean, who had sat down on a couch and hung his head in his hands.

Dean felt the seat next to him dip before a hand tentatively touched his shoulder. He knew that the touch was meant to be comforting so he looked up and smiled at Charlie. Truth be told, though, it did little to make him feel better.

Dean had run so far. He left Lawrence and everyone in it behind so he could give himself and Cas the space that they both needed, and yet it still hadn’t been enough. He wanted to laugh, or cry, at how much God obviously hated him. How could this be happening if he didn’t?

“It’s gonna be ok, Dean.” Charlie said quietly as she looked upon Dean’s face. Only a fool would believe her.

There was a quiet knock at the door. Charlie and Dean stared anxiously as Dorothy opened it just a crack before stepping aside and letting Anna in. She looked just as shocked as everyone else in the room.

“Dean,” She said quietly as she walked towards him, her hands held up. “I... well I came to apologize. I didn’t know that you were Cas’s Dean.” Anna said with raised eyebrows.

“I’m not his, he made that very clear.” Dean said tiredly before sighing.

“I know, I just.. never mind. We’re leaving, but I’m going to leave this here,” Anna laid a business card down on the coffee table. “Just in case.” She said before walking back out the same door.

Dean looked down and saw Anna Novak Photography written across the card in beautiful script. Her phone number was listed on the front. He stared at it a moment before picking it up and tucking it safely into his pocket.

*~*

_Cas was disoriented. It took him a solid ten minutes to figure out where he was and whose body he was wrapped around when he woke up. He wasn’t sure when he’d ended up in Dean’s room or why he’d gone in the first place, but he didn’t mind._

_He laid on Dean’s chest, his nose stuck in the man’s throat, and he was the most comfortable he’d been in a long time. In fact, if he wasn’t lying in a puddle of his own slick, it would be perfect._

_Dean was still fast asleep, his soft breath puffing out and hitting Cas’s cheek. The alpha’s body was warm and strong, and Cas could feel his inner omega loving the safety of the muscular arms wrapped around him. He was so fucked._

_It took a moment for him to disentangle from Dean, but when Cas was finally out of the bed he heard the alpha grunt before rolling over and spreading himself out. Cas took a moment to smile fondly down at the man before slipping out of the room quietly._

_When he got back to his own room Cas looked at his phone and frowned. It was only a bit past midnight and he could feel his heat starting to act up again. He looked at the fake knot with a sort of disdain. He wanted the real thing, and not just any alpha’s. He wanted Dean’s._

_Cas considered himself carefully. He knew he was a little heat crazy, but it wasn’t the worst he’d ever had it. If need be, he could somewhat calmly go through the motions of using the fake knot, hell he could probably go whittle a nice figurine right now. Which was why it shocked him so much that he still wanted Dean so badly._

_His phone started ringing. It wasn’t odd for Balthazar to be calling him this late, especially when Cas was in heat. There were many times that Zar would call late into the night just to check in. Cas never wanted to know what he was doing up so late._

_“Hello.” Cas answered as he wandered around the room gathering the dirty dishes that had appeared after he and Dean ate in bed._

_“Hey baby. How are you feeling?” Balthazar asked warmly._

_“I’m ok, it’s not as bad as usual.” Cas said while making his way towards the kitchen._

_“Good, and the companion they sent?” Cas felt his face go red as he thought of Dean’s perfect lips._

_“He’s good.” The answer was short, lacking any real commitment to just how good Cas found Dean._

_“Wonderful, I told them I wanted the best for you.” Cas could hear the smile in Zar’s voice. He wished he could jump through the phone and smack it off his face._

_“How’s your trip?” Cas asked changing the subject. Zar laughed at the brashness of Cas’s obvious avoidance but went with it anyways._

_“It’s wonderful, you would love Paris.”_

_“You say that every time.” The annoyance was thick in Cas’s voice as he thought of the promised romantic getaways that never happened. It had been months since Zar had even acted like he actually planned to take the omega to any of the locations he ‘would love.’_

_“Cassie, baby, you know this-“_

_“Will all pay off? Yeah, got that Zar.” Cas cut him off as he began scrubbing the dishes with his phone balanced between his ear and shoulder, he needed something to take his anger out on._

_“Well someone is being a pill.” Zar said with a sigh._

_“It’s midnight and I’m in heat, Zar. I’m not in the mood for your promises that you don’t intend to keep.” Cas snapped. He could feel his frustration and hurt boiling over. The emotions of the last few days finally catching up to him._

_“Obviously the alpha isn’t helping enough, someone needs a knot.” Zar said, voice thick with sarcasm._

_“Yeah cause it can’t have anything to do with my boyfriend being a dick can it?” The plate Cas was scrubbing clanged against the sink as he threw it down._

_He was so over this argument. They’d had it so many times that Cas knew how it would end. Zar would apologize and say he would do better and Cas would accept it knowing that the alpha had no intention of changing a damn thing. It was a broken record._

_Cas startled when he felt warm arms wrap around his waist. The smell of Dean suddenly overtaking any other scent the omega had noticed. He leaned his back against the strong chest behind him and melted as he grabbed the phone with one of his hands._

_“- so sick of the same damn fight every time.” Cas heard the tail end of what Zar was saying as Dean leaned down and peppered kisses along the omega’s exposed throat._

_“Maybe if you’d do something to change it, the fight wouldn’t always be the same.” He could feel himself purring as Dean bit lightly at his shoulder, the alpha’s growing knot grinding against his ass._

_“You really want to do this right now don’t you Cassie?” Zar asked angrily while Dean nuzzled at Cas’s scent gland._

_“No, I actually don’t. I’ve got to go.” Cas said and barely heard Balthazar yelling as he hung up the phone quickly and threw it on the counter._

_Cas groaned and reached behind him, pulling Dean’s face around so he could kiss him. Their tongues worked in tandem as Dean began palming at Cas’s bare dick._

_“Fucking finally, thought you’d never get off the phone.” He growled before dropping to his knees quickly and desperately licking at Cas’s slick._

_*_

_Dean groaned as he stretched out in the bed. There was a warm body clinging tightly to him and surprisingly the alpha was clinging right back. He could smell the aroma of heat, slick, and mate, heavy in the room and it was a combination that evidently made him rock hard._

_Dean remembered vividly waking up in the middle of the night to the hushed angry tone of Cas’s voice. It didn’t take him long to figure out that the omega was speaking with his boyfriend, just like it didn’t take him long to smell the anger and desperate need in the air._

_That smell is what inspired a late night, or early morning, orgasm. Dean had wrung one out of Cas with his fingers, while the omega gave Dean another filthy blow job that made him see stars._

_Cas had begged Dean to knot him the whole time, but the alpha wouldn’t do it. He knew how the omega felt when he wasn’t heat crazed, and there was no way Dean was going to go against his wishes now. Even if he woke up painfully hard with what was obviously his true mate._

_Dean had heard stories of it before. Had seen it in his own parents. They say that there is a true mate for every alpha and omega out there, but the likelihood of actually meeting said person was slim to none. Their scent would be irresistible, and Dean could now attest to that theory._

_Legend had it that true mates were supposed to perfect physical and psychological match for one another. They were supposed to be able to produce strong pups that would carry on the bloodlines of their parents for many generations. It was all a bunch of hype, according to Dean, the only thing he truly believed is how perfectly true mates seemed to match emotionally. He’d witnessed it with his parents. John and Mary were always so in sync with each other’s needs and feelings that it was spooky. He’d definitely seen Mary manipulate her surroundings in order to soothe John and vice versa. Whether it was through their scents or their bond, Dean was never able to tell._

_Dean’s inner alpha was screaming at him all night to take what was his, but he was able to remain rational because he knew what Cas would want. Even though the alpha was strangely possessive of the omega, he knew that the other man would want a choice, and that choice couldn’t truly be made until the heat passed._

_Dean was screwed._

_The alpha could feel Cas moving against him, squirming as he obviously fought to stay asleep. The grumpy growl that came out of the omega was almost as endearing as him peeking up at Dean with sleepy eyes and terrible bed head._

_“Good morning.” Dean smiled sweetly and laughed as Cas groaned and buried his face in the alpha’s chest. He could feel Cas taking deep breaths and wondered if his scent was intoxicating to the omega as the omega’s was to him. If Cas’s pleas last night were any indicator, it was._

_“Do you want some coffee?” Dean asked quietly as he traced patterns into Cas’s bare back. He could feel the man shake his head and smiled as he wrapped his arms tighter around the omega’s back and laid a tender kiss on top of his head._

_Dean had slept more peacefully than he ever had before and knew it had something to do with the soothing scent of his omega. When they finally laid down to sleep in the early morning hours Cas’s back was pressed so closely to Dean’s chest that there was no space between them. Now Dean laid on his back with Cas on top of him tucked safely under his chin._

_“Just wanna lay here.” Cas mumbled as he reached up one hand and began playing with Dean’s hair idly. It was in that moment of quiet that the omega’s stomach protested loudly causing him to groan._

_“You’re stomach says otherwise, Cas.” Dean whispered sweetly before disentangling himself to the sound of Cas’s grumbling protests._

_“Don’t wanna get up.” Cas pouted as he sat up in the bed. Dean just smiled and knelt down to kiss him, it was slow and sweet and the alpha felt himself melting a little more each second that passed. When they finally broke apart Cas was panting, his cheeks bright red._

_“Don’t have to, how about breakfast in bed?” Dean asked smiling. Cas smiled back, his whole face morphing before nodding excitedly._

_“Yes, that sounds good.” Cas said as he laid back down and pulled the covers over his shoulder. Dean chuckled as he made his way out of the bedroom._

_“Oh and Dean,” Dean turned back and looked at Cas, who was peeking out from under the covers. “I do actually want coffee.”_

_Dean busied himself with making breakfast. It wasn’t anything big, just eggs, bacon, and toast, but it smelled good. He plated the food quickly once it was done before walking back to the room with Cas’s food and coffee in hand before returning to grab his own._

_Soon they were settled with their food sat in their laps and the scent of coffee filling the room with the promise of energy. They talked easily about music and movies as the food quickly disappeared._

_After he cleaned up the kitchen, Dean found himself snuggled up against the omega again. It was starting to get cold out, so the cocoon of blankets they were surrounded with was cozy._

_“Tell me about your family.” Cas said as he drew circles in Dean’s chest. The alpha paused for a moment, wondering how much he should give away before smiling down at the omega._

_“My Dad is a mechanic, Mom’s a nurse- they met when my dad got back from war. He was a Marine,” Dean shrugged before chuckling. “I have a younger brother who’s going to Stanford. He’s smart as a whip, real driven too. Wants to be a lawyer.” Cas lifted his head and smiled at Dean._

_“You’re proud of your brother.” He stated with no question in his voice._

_“Yeah, well when we were growing up we kinda just had each other. Mom and Dad worked as much as possible to keep up with bills so there were a lot of nights where it was just us two. Kinda build a bond, you know?” Dean said as he stared at the ceiling smiling. He was running his fingers through Cas’s hair, he found that the omega took great comfort in the act._

_“Yeah, I have an older brother and a younger sister.” Cas said and then stopped, when it became obvious that he didn’t plan to expand on it Dean nudged him. When he saw the blue eyes peering at him, the alpha smiled._

_“Tell me about ‘em.” Dean encouraged._

_“Oh well, my brother is goofy, he loves candy. Like more than is normal for an adult,” Dean smiled at Cas’s perplexed face. “My sister is calm, always the voice reason.”_

_“And which one are you in the equation?” Dean asked gently. The question made Cas frown deeply, whatever he was thinking obviously was something he obviously didn’t like._

_“I- uh, I don’t know. I’m quiet and standoffish. I’ve always liked books more than people.” Cas shrugged awkwardly as he lay on Dean’s chest._

_“Books make more sense than people, Cas.” Dean whispered. His breath caught in his throat when he saw the omega smile widely at him._

_“Yeah, they kinda do.” Cas murmured before crawling up Dean’s chest and kissing him sweetly._

_They spent the rest of the day in bed trying to see who would moan the loudest._


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is smutty towards the end. Thank you so much for reading!

Chapter Eight

The steady rhythm of his feet hitting the sand and the sound of the waves crashing into the shore were the soundtrack of Cas’s morning run. He had woken up early from a night of fitful sleeping and hoped that a run would help energize his body enough to make it through the day.

When the three of them got home the night before Cas had went straight to his room and shut the door. He knew that Anna and Gabe wanted to talk to him about what happened back at Dean’s house, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

They already knew, of course, about the details of he and Dean’s story, but to actually put a face to the name was entirely different. Cas had spent the better part of the last two years trying to track Dean down, but it had been impossible. He never even came close.

It was just his luck that the first time he ran into Dean in two years would be on what was supposed to be a relaxing vacation with family. If he wasn’t torn up over it, Cas might actually laugh at the absurdity of the situation. As it were, though, he found himself at a loss for words.

Cas kept running until his lungs were burning and his legs felt like they were on fire. He figured that it was enough punishment for the day and decided to walk back towards the house on the sidewalk. He kept his eyes on the ground as he made his way back.

He wasn’t sure where he was, but figured it was at least a forty five minute walk home. There was a small coffee shop that had its open sign on and he figured the longer he could avoid his siblings the better. Without second thought Cas walked into the small shop and was instantly hit with the beautiful aroma of fresh coffee and pastries. He hoped it was half as good as it smelled.

The barista had instructed him to find a place to sit. Cas picked a corner next to a window that overlooked the ocean. He stared out towards the water dreamily until his americano was placed in front of him with a blueberry muffin.

He sipped the coffee slowly as he continued watching out the window. Cas was only slightly startled when the other chair at the table scraped along the floor. When he looked towards the noise he froze and carefully set his cup down.

“Cas, right?” Dorothy smiled kindly as she sat down, three to go cups were settled in the drink carrier she had along with a bag that seemed to be filled to the brim with pastries.

“Yes.” He said slowly as he eyed her with caution. He wondered, again, what he had done to deserve this sort of punishment.

“Calm down, it’s just me.” She said with a soft tone before removing one of the coffee cups and drinking from it.

“Looks like you have somewhere to be.” Cas mumbled in response before trying to sip of his coffee as nonchalantly as possible.

“Not really, everyone’s still asleep. Figured I could rouse them with the scent of coffee.” Dorothy laughed.

They sat quietly for moments before Cas started fidgeting. He wasn’t sure why the woman had joined him, and though it seemed as if she wasn’t threatening, he was still worried.

“You know, I used to work at the agency Dean met you through,” Dorothy said. Cas was surprised to hear this, he knew she looked familiar but he hadn’t been able to place it the night before. It made sense now. “I was there when you first came looking for Dean. Couldn’t give you anything for confidentiality reasons, but I always hoped that you’d be able to track him down. I’m guessing by your reaction last night you gave up at some point.” She said thoughtfully as she began eating a pastry from the bag.

“I, uh, I never gave up. Just grew tired.” Cas mumbled in response as he began picking at his muffin. Dorothy smiled at him sadly.

“Yeah, I get that. When he decided to disappear he did a good job of it,” she looked at Cas thoughtfully before taking a deep breath. “Look, I get it. I know how hard it is to find love and keep it. My mate is the love of my life, but she’s a bit impossible at times.” Dorothy laughed as she thought of Charlie.

“I don’t understand.” Cas said slowly, unsure of why the woman was treating him with such kindness.

“I’m just saying that it’s hard to make decisions regarding love and sometimes those decisions are wrong. We only see it once they’ve passed, but they can haunt us. I was bonded before I met Charlie,” Cas raised his eyebrows. Breaking a bond was as unheard of as it was nearly impossible. He found himself unconsciously leaning towards the alpha to hear the rest of her story. “It was a beta, we had our whole lives planned out. We were together for seven years before things started to change. I realized that there was something missing from our mating, and it wasn’t that he wasn’t an omega. He constantly talked down to me and was gone all the time. When I first mentioned it to him, he said that I was ‘demeaning his authority,’ whatever that means.” Dorothy sighed and shrugged her shoulders before looking out the window sadly.

“He’d always told me that he had no issue with me being an alpha. That as long we could have kids, and we knew that we could, he would be happy. I found out later on that he had been seeing other people throughout the length of our bonding. They were always specifically omegas, he said that he felt more like a man with them than he ever did with me.

“I wanted to work it out. Told him I could try to be less of what my try nature deemed me to be and more of what he needed, and it worked. For a while at least. Then I met Charlie. Dean set us up actually,” Dorothy smiled at Cas with humor. “He didn’t know that I was bonded with another, I never talked about him. He said that he knew the perfect omega for me, he told us later that he didn’t think it would actually work, he’d just wanted to get Charlie laid.” Dorothy laughed and shook her head as she sipped from her coffee.

“But it did work. Charlie would never back down to anyone, so she never cared that I was an alpha. I was upfront with her about my situation and she was so understanding, giving me the space and time I needed to make whatever decision I thought was best for me. The bond wasn’t hard to break because it never truly formed, not only did he never truly love me, but because he was a beta it never really took. It took me seven years to realize that what I had wasn’t truly love, it was control.” Dorothy fell silent as she smiled down at the table. Cas wasn’t sure if her story was over but he found himself needing more.

“And you have it now? Love?” He said in the end for clarification.

“Crazy, annoying, and stupid love. It’s not a fairytale, but it’s real and that’s all I’ve ever wanted. It took me some time to get there, but I did.” Cas smiled at the happiness in Dorothy’s voice.

“I’m glad you found what you were looking for.” He said sincerely before frowning at his cup. He’d found that two years ago but let it go.

“I often wonder if I’ll ever have a chance at that again.” He said out loud without realizing it. Dorothy placed her hand on top of Cas’s and smiled at him.

“Don’t you get it? You’re being given that opportunity right here, right now. You may have hurt Dean two years ago, but I don’t think you would do it again.” She said with a piercing gaze telling Cas exactly what she would do if he hurt him again.

“Why would he ever want to talk to me again?” Cas asked with annoyance. Why was this woman cheering him on when they both knew nothing was ever going to happen.

“Because, Cas, love is crazy, and it’s stupid, and it’s annoying.”

*~*

_“No fucking way.” Castiel peered at Dean as he stood at the kitchen counter throwing together the ingredients for cookie._

_“What? It’s normal,” Dean said self consciously before fixing Cas with an incredulous look. “Did you just say fuck?”_

_“I’m an adult, Dean, I’ve been known to dabble in cursing. Also, I know it’s normal, I just never took you to be the man who watched soap operas.” Dean shrugged as he focused on mixing the chocolate chips into the batter, his whole face glowing red._

_“Yeah, well, I guess I’m just full of surprises.” Dean tried to feign arrogance._

_The room fell silent as Dean continued working on the task at hand. So what he liked watching soap operas? They were good! He and Charlie had bonded over their love for Doctor Sexy far before games of D and D._

_He remembered the days when he was too sick to go to school. Mary would stay home with him and make him home made soup while he curled up on the couch. She always brought him a bowl full of soup, sprite, and soda crackers and she made sure that he ate it all. After, she would drape a blanket on him and pull him into her lap before turning on her afternoon soaps. Dean still called her every Wednesday night to discuss whatever shocking twist had happened on their soaps throughout the week._

_Dean knew this went without saying, but he was a mama’s boy through and through. He could spend hours with Mary and never grow tired of her loving words or biting wisdom. In fact, he often found himself longing for home and the comfort of his mom even though he lived minutes away from his parents._

_He loved John too, but in a different way. Where Mary was kind and soft John was strict and rough. His dad had taught him how to be a man, treat people with respect, and that it was always important to have a firm hand shake. The only time Dean had ever seen his dad cry was when Sam got so sick that he was laid up in the hospital for three weeks._

_Sam had lost twenty three pounds in those three weeks and he looked to be on his death bed. It was the worst month of Dean’s life. It was there that John told Dean that his boys were the most important thing in his life and that a life without his family would be meaningless._

_Dean was so wrapped up in thought that he didn’t even hear Cas’s stool move as the omega got up and walked around the counter. The only thing bringing him out of his memory were strong arms wrapping around his waist._

_Dean stilled momentarily, not sure what to do with such an intimate touch, before relaxing back into Cas’s warm chest._

_*_

_Cas could tell that Dean was hurt. By the way he refused to look up from the dough he was making, Cas knew that he had misstepped in his wording and he instantly regretted it. The panic and anxiety that settled deep in his stomach as he watched the alpha’s features became carefully schooled and stoic made him feel terrible. So he did the only thing he could of to bring Dean back._

_He stood and walked quietly around the counter until he could wrap his arms around Dean. Cas panicked further when the alpha became stiff at the touch, but was relieved when Dean finally relaxed back into him._

_“Dean, you are so beautiful,” Cas found himself babbling without knowing exactly where he was going, just that he was letting his heart take the wheel for once. “You’re an anomaly, a strong alpha that cares for those he watches, who doesn’t show his anger even when a stranger calls him names he doesn’t deserve, you’re so strong and yet so sensitive in the best way.” Cas kissed the back of Dean’s neck tenderly. The alpha sighed and rested a hand on top of Cas’s arms where they were still wrapped tightly around him._

_“It’s hard, you know? I just want to be me without having to worry about being an alpha at the same time.” Dean said quietly. Cas groaned before resting his forehead on Dean’s shoulder._

_“You don’t have to worry Dean, at least not with me. Please don’t ever worry with me.” Cas whispered before kissing Dean’s jaw and neck._

_“You say that now.” Dean mumbled as he carefully removed himself from Cas’s grip and started forming the cookies on an oven sheet that was covered in parchment paper. Cas stared at his back with a questioning look, an internal war about whether he should pursue the conversation going on in his mind. In the end his curiosity won out._

_“What do you mean?” Cas asked quietly as he walked around the counter and sat back down on his stool._

_Dean was so concentrated on the task at hand that Cas thought he wasn’t going to answer. In fact it took the alpha several moments before he sighed and looked up at Cas._

_“It’s just that I’ve, uh, well I’ve seen this before Cas. You’re an omega in heat, the comfort of an alpha distracts from any other factor. You’ll wake up in a couple days and forget about... everything.” Dean frowned, a forlorn look taking over his eyes as he stared at Cas._

_“Well look whose labeling now.” Cas laughed bitterly before pushing the stool out and walking towards a wall that proudly displayed a picture of he and Zar._

_It was Zar’s one year anniversary present to Cas. They drove out to the middle of nowhere and had a picnic by an old dilapidated barn. When another car showed up Cas had panicked, thinking that they were trespassing. It turned out to be a professional photographer that Zar had scheduled a shoot with. He remembered being so happy that day, Cas had always wanted professional pictures and it meant a lot to him that Zar had listened. Times had been easier then, they had been happier and more in tune to each other’s wants and needs. Now it was like Cas was living with a stranger._

_“When we first started dating, Zar was just a waiter for a ritzy restaurant on Chicago. I was visiting my brother while he was away at college,” Cas smiled at the memory as he laughed to himself. “I remember my brother telling me that he had been saving for months to go eat at this place and he didn’t want to share the experience with anyone but me.” Cas took a deep breath and continued as he stared at the picture of the once loving couple with bright smiles on their faces._

_“We rented tuxes and fancy shoes to go there. Made reservations and showed up five minutes early. They sat us in a secluded dining area with a few other fancy people who didn’t look like they were playing the part, they were the part. Zar was our server. I remember thinking he was so handsome and that his accent was the best thing since bees, and bees are pretty fucking great.” Cas smiled as he remembered the first time he saw Zar._

_“We got the most expensive things on the menus and ordered a bottle wine that is still the best thing I’ve ever drank. At some point my brother and I started arguing over something and it ended with him throwing a bread roll at my face while Zar was passing by us heading for the kitchen. I was horrified, my brother was too. We had gone the extra mile to make sure we fit in and in one second of lapsed judgement we threw it all away.”_

_“All of the other patrons were staring at us with disgusted expressions, it was so quiet you could hear a needle drop. Then out of nowhere Zar begins laughing hysterically. He was doubled over in a fit of giggles and soon we couldn’t help but join in too. When he finally calmed himself down he said loud enough for everyone to hear ‘fucking great, I love it.’ I had his number before the night was over.” Cas smiled as he remembered how Zar had taken such joy in their shenanigans. He aches for those times when they actually enjoyed each other._

_“What happened?” Dean asked, drawing Cas’s attention away from the picture and back towards the alpha. He stood at the counter still, the picture of patience as he waited for the happy ending they both knew wouldn’t ever come._

_“He moved out here to be with me and got a job at a big advertising firm. I always wondered if he resented me, in a way, for coming here. Zar said it was the easy decision since most of my family was still here and he had none, but things changed. We changed,” Cas sighed and frowned as he wrapped his arms around his middle in a protective gesture._

_“He was such an easy spirit, never wanted anything but to be happy. The Zar that I used to know didn’t care about the clothes he wore or the amount money in his bank account. He was just so free. We always said we were going to do it, always planned to mate and bind ourselves for life, but things always got in the way. I wonder now if there’s still a part of the care free alpha in there, the part that doesn’t want to be tied down to anything permanent. The part that doesn’t want to be tied down to me.” Cas stared at the floor, by the time he finished his voice barely above a whisper. The panic was starting to settle in his stomach, he’d never admitted that aloud and wondered what it was about Dean that made him feel safe enough to share his darkest thoughts._

_“Cas, I-“ Dean started before Cas waved him off._

_“I don’t ask for pity or sorrow on my behalf, Dean. I’ve had really good times with Zar, and I suppose that’s why I hold onto the hope that he will come back to me. I remember every joyous moment we’ve ever shared, every time that he has made me happy beyond words.” Cas didn’t notice Dean moving towards him until the alpha’s arms were wrapping around him, holding him in a tight hug._

_Cas nuzzled into Dean’s neck and inhaled the smell of pure mate that his companion hadn’t bothered trying to hide lately. He relaxed into Dean’s arms and stayed in the safe cocoon of comforting scents and warm alpha for long moments as he tried to gather his thoughts._

_“He doesn’t smell as good as you.” Cas murmured, unsure of why he felt the need to tell Dean that. He felt the alpha chuckle lightly._

_“Cas, you smell like my favorite place to be. Never smelled anything like it before.” Dean said as he sniffed at Cas’s hair._

_Cas looked up at Dean before leaning in slowly and stopping inches away from the alpha’s lips. They stared at each other for a few charged moments before Dean leaned the rest of the way in, bringing their lips together in a soft kiss that made Cas question every belief he had ever had._

_“Dean, please, I need you.” Cas whimpered when Dean pulled away. The alpha had several emotions cross his face before a calm came across it._

_Cas had been begging Dean non stop for his knot. He knew that he may be slightly heat crazed, but there was a very sane voice telling him that he had to have Dean. That somehow mating this alpha, and this alpha only, would be life shattering but only in the best way. Though the companion had been resolute in his initial stance against knotting Cas, the omega could see the restraint slipping away. He didn’t plan on telling his story to get Dean to knot him, but if it did Cas didn’t care._

_“Don’t want you to regret it.” Dean said defeatedly before Cas grabbed his face with both his hands and brought him down for another gentle kiss._

_“M’not gonna.” Cas promised while running his thumb along Dean’s cheek bone._

_“What are you gonna say when you’re not in heat anymore?” Dean whispered as he peered into Cas’s eyes._

_“That I could never regret you.” Cas said. Dean sucked a breath in and closed his eyes, like he was trying to think._

_Cas watched him, memorizing every beautiful feature on Dean’s face. He couldn’t think of a time he’d seen someone so mesmerizing. He couldn’t tell if it was his heat, the enticing scent, or his heart that was making him so entranced with the alpha, but he didn’t question it. He just waited for Dean’s answer._

_“I’m too weak.” Dean sighed finally as he placed his hands on Cas’s hips and squeezed gently._

_“No,” Cas whispered before he kissed Dean gently. “You’re too strong, won’t take anything from someone if it might be good for you. Be weak, if even just for a brief moment.” Cas wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck and pulled him in for a searing kiss._

_Dean’s large hands began moving with no specific intent over Cas’s back. The omega pushed up closer so that the two were chest to chest with nothing between them but their shirts._

_When Cas felt Dean’s hands slip under his shirt and caress the bare skin of his hips he moaned. The touch was like fire to him, he could feel the alpha’s hands making a blazing path as they moved higher up towards his back._

_“So warm,” Cas whimpered. He’d never been so turned on from such a simple touch before. “Want to see you.” He said, unable to form full sentences. Dean pulled back so he could look into Cas’s eyes. Whatever the alpha saw must have been good enough because he just nodded quietly before taking his own shirt off._

_Cas’s breath caught as he studied the man before him. Miles of sun kissed skin stretched over hard muscle. He reached out a hand and laid it flat against Dean’s stomach, causing the alpha to suck in a sharp breath as he closed his eyes._

_“You’re so beautiful.” Cas whispered reverently as he moved his hand over Dean’s chest slowly. He leaned in and kissed above Dean’s heart before he started placing sloppy kisses all over the alpha’s front. When he got to the man’s nipples he bit one gently before sucking it to a hard point and moving to the other._

_Dean growled deep his throat as he watched the tuft of black hair moving spastically across his body. He wasn’t able to see Cas’s face as the man wouldn’t look up from whatever mission he was on. Wherever Cas’s lips weren’t, his hands were roaming. Dean stood still as he let the omega explore the plains of his body._

_Suddenly Cas was standing behind Dean staring at his strong back. His hands began mapping out the alpha’s shoulders before moving down. He made sure to worship the backside as much as he had the front._

_Cas smiled as Dean began panting and writhing over his touch. He’d never drawn this strong of a reaction out of anyone and it made him feel powerful. The omega in him was gloating with pride as this alpha, his alpha, turned into putty under his ministrations._

_Only when Cas was sure that he had ran his lips over every inch of naked skin that Dean presented to him did he move back so he was facing his alpha. He placed his hand on the back of Dean’s neck and pulled him into another heated kiss. Their tongues tangled as he began working the button of Dean’s pants. Once he had them undone he pushed his hands down into the fabric and pulled the pants off of Dean’s slim hips._

_Cas knelt down and helped the alpha step out of them before running his hands along the inside of Dean’s legs. He smiled at his bow legs and decided that those would be a new kink of his._

_The omega gave Dean’s legs the same attention he had given the upper half. Cas nipped at the inside of his alpha’s thighs and nuzzled at his dick, loving the heavy feeling of it on his face. He licked the tip of Dean’s dick teasingly before grabbing his hips and turning him._

_Cas was face to face with Dean’s ass and he moaned at the sight of it. He palmed the round globes before slapping them lightly and shoving his tongue up Dean’s hole. There was no preamble or warning, and it caught the alpha off guard. He froze as the foreign feeling took over his body._

_“What’s the matter Alpha?” Cas said with a teasing voice, but Dean could hear the hint of worry bleeding into the statement. He tried to relax and peered behind him to see Cas with rosy red cheeks, his chest heaving as he knelt still fully clothed in front of Dean’s ass._

_“Just not used to it is all, my omega.” Dean murmured. Cas closed his eyes and purred, fucking purred, at his alpha calling him his own._

_“That’s a shame, this ass should be worshipped.” Cas said as he smiled up at Dean with apprehension written all over his face._

_“Then fucking worship it, Omega.” Dean said in his alpha voice. Cas closed his eyes and felt a shiver run down his spine before shoving his face in his alpha’s ass and eating it with vigor._

_“Fuuuck.” Dean moaned as Cas’s tongue worked his hole. One of the alpha’s large hands snaked around his back to grab a tuft of black hair._

_Cas took a moment to look up at the green eyed beauty and felt his breath catch in his throat. There Dean stood, his upper half twisted so his muscles were rippling perfectly, his eyes closed as he tipped his head towards the ceiling with his mouth hanging slightly open._

_He was perfect._

_Cas squeezed his ass cheeks with both hands and pulled them apart. He groaned as he looked at Dean’s pert hole wet with Cas’s spit. The alpha obviously shaved his whole body, there was not one spot that wasn’t smooth to the touch._

_Cas wanted, no, needed for this man to posses his body. Take whatever the omega had to offer and leave him with nothing more. He wanted to see Dean’s primal alpha side take over all his senses and claim what was his. And he knew, without a doubt, that he was Dean’s._

_Cas stood slowly, making sure his tongue never actually left Dean’s body, until he was at full height. He caught Dean’s earlobe between his teeth and bit down sharply._

_“C’mere.” Dean mumbled as he turned around and swallowed Cas’s laugh with his lips. They stood pressed together, Dean naked while Cas was still fully clothed, and licked into each other’s mouths._

_Dean sunk his hands under Cas’s shorts and squeezed his ass. He marveled at how perfectly those globes fit into his big hands. He moved one hand to the front and lowered the omega’s shorts enough that his dick popped out the front. Grabbing it with a firm grip Dean began stroking up and down languidly while he still palmed Cas’s ass with his other hand._

_“Oh Dean.” Cas murmured breathlessly as he rested his forehead on the alpha’s shoulder. Dean nuzzled his nose into the thick black hair and breathed deeply._

_Dean pushed his shorts all the way off and Cas kicked out of them quickly before stripping off his shirt with enthusiasm. He then laced his fingers together around Dean’s neck and walked backwards towards his room while kissing the alpha with nothing short of abandon._

_When they reached the bedroom, Cas wordlessly left Dean and climbed onto the dominating bed. Soon he was supporting himself on his forearms, his chest flat with the bed while his ass stuck high in the air. There was no questioning what the omega wanted._

_With his ass presented, Cas could feel the slick sliding down his thighs. He writhed senselessly on the bed, enjoying the feel of the sheets rubbing against his skin. When he heard a low growl coming from the area he’d left Dean standing in, Cas slowly looked over at him and chuckled lowly._

_Dean stood buck naked and palming himself as he watched Cas in the middle of the bed. His face was dark and his body was rigid. Cas moaned deep and low at the sight of the dominating alpha._

_“What are you waiting for?” Cas asked sweetly as he continued rutting his hips in the thin air._

_“Permission.” Dean answered lowly. Cas stopped for a moment. He wondered what could have possibly made the alpha think that he didn’t have absolute consent, but then he remembered reading a pamphlet about companions when Zar had first enlisted the service. Alphas had to get complete verbal consent from their clients before actually using their knot while omega companions had to give complete consent before their alpha clients could knot them._

_“You gotta give me permission, Omega.” Dean said again, breaking Cas out of his thoughts. He looked the alpha up and down before licking his lips. He didn’t miss that Dean had followed the motion with his eyes._

_“Knot me Alpha, I give you permission to take what’s yours.” Cas said lowly and watched as Dean began moving towards the bed with calculated motions, a low growl escaping the alpha’s throat._

_“What’s mine, Cas?” Dean said lowly, his voice dangerous and soft._

_“Me, Alpha, I’m yours.” Cas groaned, even though there was a small part of him that was protesting his words. He couldn’t stop the uncontrollable lust he felt for the man who was currently stalking him like Cas was prey._

_“Fuckin right your mine,” Dean growled before kneeling on the bed. “Gonna get mine.” He said as he lunged towards Cas and stuck his tongue right in the omega’s ass._

_“Oh fuck, Alpha.” Cas groaned as he ground his ass into Dean’s face. He could feel the fingers joining the alpha’s tongue before he even had time to realize what was going on._

_Cas knew Dean was making sure not to hit his prostate on purpose, he was an omega in heat after all. With how wound up he was, Cas didn’t think he would last five minutes with Dean’s knot, let alone if the alpha was pressing on that bundle that drove the omega wild._

_“So good for me Omega.” Dean mumbled as he puffed a warm breath out on Cas’s ass._

_“Please Alpha.” Cas said incoherently. He heard the rip of a condom wrapper and thought momentarily about telling Dean that he was clean and on birth control, but realized in a rare thought of clarity that they couldn’t go without protection. Not in this situation, at least._

_Dean used the slick out of Cas’s ass to lube his thick knot up before lining it up with the omega’s hole. He pushed in slowly, knowing that even though Cas’s body was meant to take a knot it wasn’t fair to just shove it in._

_Cas whimpered and moaned as Dean worked inch by agonizing inch into his ass. He was consumed with fire and lust, all he could think about was the welcome feeling of the knot._

_“Alpha... please... fuck me.” Cas slurred as he felt Dean’s thighs lay flush with his own, fully seated in his ass._

_“How do you want it?” Dean asked darkly as he bent over and licked at the sweat forming on Cas’s back._

_“Hard.” It was the only thing Cas could say and Dean didn’t ask for more._

_The alpha drew back slowly before slamming into Cas with such force that the head board knocked against the wall. He continued the pace for what felt like hours before he grabbed Cas’s waist with both hands and began pulling the omega back on his dick._

_“Oh fuck! Fuckin mate me!” Cas yelled as he fisted his hands into the covers._

_“So good for your alpha, so fuckin good.” Dean answered as he continued pounding into Cas. He grabbed a tuft of the omega’s hair and pulled until Cas was just on his knees, his back flush with Dean’s front._

_The strong arm that wrapped around Cas’s chest was undoubtedly there to hold him up, because they both knew there was no way he could do that on his own. Dean’s other hand snaked down and began jerking Cas’s dick sporadically as he lavished the omega’s neck with sloppy kisses._

_“Feel so good. So tight for me.” Dean muttered as his knot began to swell, catching on Cas’s rim._

_Soon the only sounds filling the room were Dean’s grunts and Cas’s debauched moans as they chased their orgasms._

_“Fucking... Oh shit... Dean.” Cas cried as he felt the spurts of cum stringing out his body. He felt Dean’s knot pop as he filled the condom with his own cum and shouted something that Cas couldn’t concentrate on enough to hear._

_Cas didn’t know when it happened, but at some point Dean had lowered them to their sides. They lay comfortably on top of the comforter as they waited for the alpha’s knot to go down._

_Cas was in a euphoric state. He’d never been filled so well, not just his ass, but all of his senses were firing as they lay together coming down from their high. Their scents mixed together gave him a sense of home, and Cas thought again that he was absolutely fucked in every way possible._


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember there’s two sides to every story. As always, thank you for reading. I’ve loved reading all the comments and I appreciate all the kudos. You guys are just amazing!

Chapter Nine

The shrill ringing of his phone was what finally drug Dean out of his sleep. He sat up and groaned, stretching his arm out to grab the offending object from its spot on his night stand. He felt the small smile form on his face when he saw his mom’s face lighting up his screen.

“Hey Mom.” Dean said with a yawn once he had his phone placed up next to his ear.

“Oh shoot, did I wake you?” Mary asked with a concerned tone. Dean smiled and shook his head as he adjusted his spot on the bed.

“Would it really matter if you did?” He asked.

“No, you’re right, it wouldn’t,” Mary chuckled as a clanking noise sounded in the background. “Stop that John! I’m trying to talk to Dean!” He heard Mary scold before a brief shuffle of the phone.

“Hey Son, how are you?” John’s deep baritone came through the speaker.

“Doing good, Dad. How’s retirement treating you?”

“Never knew how neglected this damn house was. Your mother has a new project for me every day.” John huffed, his voice filled with annoyed adoration.

“Yeah, well we all know how crazy you’d go without something to do.” Dean said.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sound like your mother kid. Listen, I’m going to give the phone back to Mary. Just wanted to say hi.” Before Dean could respond he could hear the faint shuffle of the phone again.

“Well isn’t he just full of piss and vinegar this morning? Ask the man to do one thing and suddenly I’m demanding.” Mary said with a tone of disapproval that had Dean laughing.

“How you doing Mom?”

“Oh good, just trying to get the house ready before Sam and Jess get here.” Mary answered. Sam and his mate had decided to spend their two weeks off between semesters in Lawrence. Mary had been ecstatic about the news and hadn’t stopped talking about it for weeks. Sam was a real kiss ass.

“Only thing you gotta have is food for the moose. Last time he was here for over a week I had to go grocery shopping five times.” Dean said as he rolled his eyes at the memory.

“Speaking of, we were thinking with both of us retiring that we’d come down for a little visit next month. I know we were just there a couple weeks ago, but we thought if you were up for the company it’d be nice to spend some more time with you.” Mary said absentmindedly.

“Absolutely, you know my door is always open. Just let me know when and I’ll be ready.” Dean smiled at the thought of his parents visiting again.

“Well, I know you say that, but I still want to make sure.”

“Yeah, next month is perfect.” Dean said with a sigh. Mary grew quiet on the other end, which was never a good sign.

“What’s wrong Dean?” She asked sharply, never one to beat around the bush.

“Nothing Mom, just tired is all.” Dean’s words were met with an ugly snort from the other end of the line.

“Seriously Dean? I thought we’d established a long time ago that a boy can’t lie to his mom. Tell me what’s going on.”

“I don’t even know where to start, Mom.” Dean said quietly. He’d never told his family that the reason he up and ran two years ago was due to some client he’d fallen for. He was pretty sure that they wouldn’t take too kindly to him leaving them for a reason like that. So when Mary asked Dean to talk, he quite literally had no clue what to tell her.

“Well I got time, why don’t you start at the beginning?” Mary said gently. The soft tone of a mother’s concern soothing Dean in a way he hadn’t known he needed.

So he told her everything. From beginning to end, the whole ugly truth was laid out on the table to her. Dean felt the tears slipping down his face as he called himself weak and scared while Mary gently, but sternly, disagreed with him. He wasn’t sure how long it took, but by the time he was done his eyes were sore and he could hear Charlie talking to Dorothy. None of it mattered, though, the only thing that mattered was what Mary was going to tell him. His mom always had the answers.

“Oh sweetie,” Mary said in a soothing voice, the nick name she used was only uttered when she was trying to comfort. “I wish you had told me sooner, though I don’t know what I could have done.”

“I don’t even know what to do Mom, he’s here and I should want to run away from him, but I don’t want to. I just want to go to him and I- fuck I just don’t know!” Dean said frustratedly.

“First, watch that mouth Dean Winchester. Second, I didn’t raise a coward.”

“I ran! I left everyone behind!” Dean scoffed, annoyed that Mary didn’t just agree with him.

“Dean you gave him what he asked for, maybe you went a little over the top with the whole moving to a different state, but you did what was asked of you. Yes, at the time it was probably the best thing for both of you, but I would bet that that’s not the case anymore.”

“Really? What do you think, it’s fate or something stupid like that?” Dean huffed.

“And if I said yes would you have a valid argument against it?” Dean stopped fiddling for a moment and thought about how it might seem that way. “Look Dean, I’m not saying life is a fairytale, but from what you’re telling me that’s your true mate. You ran two years ago and gave him no indication of where you were, and somehow the ass shows up in your backyard!” Mary exclaimed, clearly exhausted with her son.

“So what? I should just forget all the shit he said?” Dean asked angrily.

“No, you should talk to him, Dean! You both owe each other an explanation and you’ll never get that if you don’t use your damn words.”

Once the call ended, Dean stayed in his room thinking about what his mom had said. Maybe she was right, he wanted an explanation from Cas. Wanted to know why the omega had chosen to walk away from him two years ago.

There was a part of him that thought Cas would want to talk to him as well. Judging from his face the night before, the blue eyed angel was just as lost as Dean.

Dean picked up the business card that was sitting on his night stand. He’d been thinking about the offending paper all night. It was his link to Cas.

Before he could change his mind, Dean dialed the number and clicked call. Some pop song played as the ring back tone while he waited for Anna to answer the phone. He began worrying that he’d have to leave a voicemail when he heard the woman’s voice on the other end. She sounded a bit winded as she greeted with a breathless hello.

“Hey Anna, it’s Dean.” He said dumbly. Dean thought he should probably say something more, but found himself unable.

“Oh, hi Dean. How are you?” She sounded a bit surprised but no less happy to hear from him.

“I’m doing alright, considering. Listen, I was kinda wondering if I might be able to get in touch with Cas somehow?” Dean felt his heart hammering in his chest as silence followed his question. Anna must have noticed that she kept quiet for a beat too long because she rushed into her next statement.

“Yes, yes of course. I’ll give you his number, can you take it down?” She asked. Dean scrambled around the room looking for something to write with and on, but before long he had Cas’s phone number scrawled on a piece of scratch paper.

Dean didn’t waste any time with texting Cas. He figured if he waited too long he would undoubtedly chicken out, and he knew he wasn’t brave enough to call him just yet.

 **9:47 AM Dean: Hey Cas, this is Dean.  
9:47 AM Dean: Anna gave me your number,   
hopefully that’s ok.  
9:48 AM Dean: We need to talk**.

Jesus Dean, why did he have to send that in three desperate sounding texts?! He silently cursed himself for not playing it cool as he waited for a response. The reply came surprisingly quickly.

**9:52 AM Cas: Hello Dean, of course it’s ok that  
you have my number. I agree   
that we need to talk, just tell me   
when and where. I’ll be there.  
9:53 AM Dean: There’s a diner on Fifth and   
Main called Martha’s. Meet   
me there at 12:30 today?  
9:53 AM Cas: Of course Dean.  
9:53 AM Dean: I would like this to be a private   
discussion.  
9:57 AM Cas: I would like that as well?  
9:58 AM Dean: Ok.**

Dean sat the phone face down and tried to fight the burning need to vomit. Texting the man had been the easy part, now he had to actually talk to him face to face.

After two years Dean had absolutely no clue what he was going to say. When the wound was still fresh he’d wanted to give Cas a piece of his mind. Tell the omega just how worthless Balthazar was and how stupid he was for giving up a chance at a happy life with Dean for that asshole.

Once his emotions had calmed, though, Dean just felt bad. Bad for putting Cas in a position that the omega never wanted to be in. Bad for putting his own feelings into what was clearly a business transaction. No matter how strongly Dean fell for Cas in that one week, he was still a companion. Still working for a client and it wasn’t the omega’s fault for saying things in his heat that Dean knew better than to believe.

So yeah Cas had broken his heart, but Dean put him in the position that deemed he had to.

*~*

_Cas listened to the lazy drawl of the cowboy on the screen as he laid contently on the couch. His head was resting on Dean’s lap and he was curled up under a large blanket._

_Dean was running his fingers through Cas’s hair with one hand and eating popcorn from a large bowl with the other. It was the most content the omega had felt in a long time. He wondered what that said for his life with Zar. He had spent two years with the man and yet he never felt this at ease in the same room as him._

_Cas knew that Zar’s impending return loomed over the room. Tonight would be Dean’s last night in the apartment and then he would disappear out of Cas’s life presumably forever. The omega tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach whenever the thought crossed his mind._

_The past week had been blissful and easy. Cas didn’t have to sensor himself around Dean, didn’t have to hold back his want for more. The alpha just got it, got him, in a way that no one else had before. They had spent the past couple of days trying to keep Cas’s heat at bay with earth shattering orgasms and hours locked together by Dean’s knot. It was everything that the omega wanted._

_Cas smiled as he listened to Dean reciting the words to the movie and felt his eyelids dropping to the sound of the alpha’s deep baritone. When he started snoring Dean laughed._

_“Getting sleepy?” Dean asked when Cas startled awake. He looked up at the alpha and saw him smiling down._

_“Didn’t realize how tired I was.” Cas said sheepishly._

_“You’ve had a tough week, you’ve got to be exhausted.” Dean threaded his fingers through Cas’s hair._

_“I guess.” Cas said gloomily. He didn’t want to go to bed because he’d have to wake up tomorrow and watch Dean leave. The alpha must have picked up on this if the way his face fell was any indicator._

_“Thank you.” Dean said quietly as he stared down like Cas was the only thing in the room._

_“For what?” Cas asked, his face knitted together with confusion._

_“For opening up to me.” Dean said simply before he switched the TV off and stood up. He helped Cas stand from his sprawling position on the couch and pulled him in for a kiss._

_There was no searing heat behind it, just simple and sweet. The way Cas imagined an alpha would kiss his mate. The thought made him whimper as he felt tears threatening to flow over._

_“Dean, can we.. will you..” Cas trailed off, trying to think of how he was going to ask Dean to stay. He’d been thinking of it all day, trying to work up the nerve to ask the alpha, no his alpha, to give what they had an honest try._

_Cas had planned it all out. He had enough money to get a new place. It wouldn’t take him long to get all his things together, he didn’t have much in the apartment he cared about. Things between he and Zar were basically over, all he’d have to do is say the words that had been sitting on the tip of his tongue for so long now._

_He was ready._

_“Can we try this?” Cas peered up at the alpha, his eyes wide and scared at what the answer might be._

_“Try what?” Dean asked, a confused look on his face._

_“Us, can we try it? I know it’s crazy, but I swear I’ve thought it through. I’ll tell Zar things are over tomorrow and we can be together. See if this thing we have is real.” Cas ran through his thoughts quickly and hopefully as he tried to portray to Dean how seriously he was taking this._

_Dean sighed, a pained expression on his face as he looked towards the ceiling. He was quiet for a few moments before he looked back down at Cas. It was at this moment that the omega felt the true meaning of a heart ache. The set in the alpha’s face said it all._

_“Cas, I know what we have seems amazing, but what about tomorrow? What about when Zar comes home? Where are you going to live? All of your stuff is here, your life is here.” Dean sounded tired and crushed. Cas didn’t think before grabbing Dean’s between his hands and forcing the alpha to look him in the eyes._

_“I’ll tell Zar I’m leaving, the minute he gets here. It’s over. Has been for a long tome. I can pack what I need in one suitcase and stay at a hotel until I get a new apartment. I make enough that I can afford a decent enough place on my own,” Cas stared at Dean, pleading for him to see the potential that Cas did. “Dean, please. We can do this, we can be good.” He said quietly, Dean shook his head and stepped back._

_“You’re just saying that Cas, just coming down from a high. You won’t feel the same three weeks down the road.” Cas could feel his face heating as the tears threatened to spill over._

_“You don’t know that Dean! If you don’t want me, just tell me, but don’t try to act like I’m just some fickle omega.” Cas said angrily as his voice wobbled with emotions._

_“Cas, baby, I want you, I do, but you have a life. A good life. You can’t just walk away from everything you have for me. I can’t let you do that.” Dean looked crushed. His face lined with sadness as he tried to help Cas understand._

_“Why? It’s my life to walk away from Dean.”_

_“Cas.. please, I just can’t.” Dean sighed._

_“Three weeks from now.” Cas said, his face brightening._

_“Huh?” Dean asked with apprehension._

_“Three weeks from now we’ll meet. We can choose a place and a time. Then we can talk,” Dean started shaking his head and backing away. “No, give me the three weeks Dean. Don’t just walk away from me, please. You said three weeks is what it would take for me to realize, if that’s what it takes for you to realize that I’m not changing my mind, then meet me in three weeks.” Cas was determined, the look of fire in his eyes._

_Dean found himself nodding, even though he knew his heart was going to get broken._

_~_

_Dean spent the next three weeks working at the garage. John had gone to the doctor and found out he was worse for wear. Somehow they had gotten him in for emergency surgery within a week of his initial appointment and now he was laid up at home acting the part of Mary’s patient._

_Dean tried not to think of Cas. Only when it was late and he was laying in bed did the alpha let his mind wander. He thought of how their lives would be if they shared every high moment and downfall together. He dreamt of being able to hold the man’s hand as they walked down the street. Working a normal nine to five, because there was no way Dean would want to continue being a companion if he had a mate of his own._

_Mate. The word brought a smile to Dean’s lips. The idea of Cas walking around with Dean’s mark on him made the inner alpha in him swell. He would protect the man, give him all he ever wanted and more. They would have pups. Lots of them. Though the two hadn’t uttered a thing about the subject, he just knew Cas would be a great dad._

_So yeah, at night Dean let his thoughts get away from him and he hoped that Cas hadn’t changed his mind. He hoped that maybe all the years of being alone would finally come to an end and he would have someone to share his life with._

_Dean didn’t talk to his family about it, he didn’t want them to know until it was set. While he had optimistic hopes, he still knew that there was a chance it wouldn’t work out the way he wanted it to. He did, however, tell Charlie about it._

_Charlie scolded him for falling for a client. She told him it was about the stupidest thing he’d ever done, but she still smiled when Dean told her how amazing Cas was. Even she couldn’t deny that for the first time in a long time she saw hope etched in her best friend’s face. It was an emotion that didn’t often surface on Dean._

_When the three weeks were up, Dean left the garage early after Bobby told him he was too damn anxious to be doing good work. He went to his apartment and showered before pulling on a nice pair of blue jeans with a black henley. He sat on his couch and turned on the tv, trying to pass the time before heading to the agreed upon spot to meet._

_Dean was nervous, his energy crawling under his skin as he waited for the moment that would surely decide the trajectory of his future. He kept checking his phone to make sure he left at the right time, but the minutes were dragging._

_One hour_

_Fifty two minutes_

_Forty seven minutes_

_Thirty three minutes_

_Twenty eight minutes_

_Seventeen minutes_

_Twelve minutes_

_Fuck it._

_He stood from the couch and grabbed his keys before locking up the apartment._

_It was a beautiful day out. Dean could feel the light heat of the sun beating down on his back as he took long strides towards the Impala. When he got in he turned up the radio and let the soothing voice of Bob Seger fill the car while he drove to the park that was halfway between both their apartments._

_It was a nice spot, Mary used to bring Dean and Sammy when they were feeling cooped up. She would take a romance novel and sit on one of the benches while the boys acted like they were driving across the country hunting monsters and saving lives. Dean wasn’t too ashamed to admit that by the time they finally quit playing the game they had made up hundreds of monsters and the different ways to kill them._

_The spot was nostalgic for Dean, and he hoped to get another piece of happiness from it._

_When Dean chose a parking spot he looked out and saw that Cas had gotten there a little bit early as well. He was sitting on a picnic table staring down at his hands pensively. The man was just as beautiful as Dean remembered, his wild hair and stern face. He had to fight the urge to run up and kiss him._

_Instead, Dean walked slowly up to Cas and tried to memorize everything about the moment. The green trees swaying gently in the breeze, the birds chirping happily in the background, and the large smiles on the faces of children as they ran around excitedly._

_Dean could feel his heart beating out of his chest as he approached Cas. When he was a few steps away the omega looked up at him._

_It was in that moment that Dean knew he wouldn’t be walking happy._

_Cas looked defeated. His face was drawn and the bags under his eyes were prominent. The five o clock shadow was well past that point and on it’s way to scruffy. He was a broken man._

_“Hello Dean.” Cas said quietly as Dean sat on the other side of the bench. He reached out to grab the omega’s hand and felt a pang in his chest when Cas quickly drew his own back._

_“Cas, what’s wrong?” Dean asked, even though he knew the answer. He just had to hear the words, needed the closure._

_“Dean.. I - I don’t know how to say this,” Cas took a deep breath and swallowed. Dean tracked the motion of his Adam’s apple moving beneath his beard. “I’ll just come out with it. Zar and I have decided to try and work on things.” There it was._

_Dean’s world slowed around him as a high pitch ringing sounded off in his ears. He struggled for breath as he tried to process what Cas was saying._

_How could this have happened? Cas had been so adamant about there being nothing left of the relationship he had with Balthazar. Hell, Dean had almost taken him up on his offer three weeks ago but knew he needed to give the omega time._

_They had been so happy for that week. The easy laughter that they shared had seemed so real. When they were laying together in bed it had been so right, it had been like Dean wasn’t just another companion._

_But that was the problem, after all. He was just another companion. Always had been. He would never be the first choice to any clients let alone one as amazing as Cas. He was a fool to think anything could happen between the two of them. Cas was too good for Dean._

_“I... uh, I guess I understand.” Dean said numbly. He thought he saw a fleeting moment of brokenness cross Cas’s face, but it was gone before he really had a chance to notice it._

_“I’m so sorry, Dean, I never meant for any of this happen.” Cas looked back down at the table._

_Dean felt the urge to fight, to scream, to beg, to do anything to keep this beautiful man by his side. His inner alpha was screaming at him for not defending his mate, but what was there to defend Cas from if not himself?_

_“Yeah, that’s what they all say.” Dean said sadly as he stood, unable to take another moment in the presence of rejection._

_“Dean,” Cas said, his voice cracking as if he was on the verge of spilling tears. When Dean looked towards him, though, Cas had put up a barrier. His face was void of any emotion. “I just need space.”_

_It felt like a kick to the gut. Like Dean had somehow been smothering him. How could he have been smothering Cas when he hadn’t seen him in three weeks? Anger boiled under his skin as he glared at the omega he hoped to share his life with._

_“Yeah, Cas, I’ll give you all the space you fucking need.” Dean bit out before turning on his heels and stomping towards the Impala._

_What he didn’t notice with his back turned was the lonely omega crumpling under the pressure of the shit his life had fell to in the past three weeks. Dean didn’t notice Cas crying as he walked away._


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading! I love reading all of your comments and seeing the kudos. I’m so happy that you guys seem to enjoy it!

Chapter Ten

Cas watched as people passed by the window of the little diner Dean had asked to meet at. They all looked so happy and carefree, not a worry in the world. There were the families who were obviously there on vacation, dressed down in t shirts and shorts while they laughed about whatever adventure they had gone on that day. Then there were the locals, they looked just as happy to be near the ocean but without the carefree expressions on their faces.

He wondered what they were on their way to. Was it an afternoon at the beach or the swing shift at their job? Were they going to meet with a friend or were they going home to an empty house? Anything to keep his mind off of the impending visit.

It was not lost on him that two years, one month, three weeks, and five days ago he found himself in a similar position to this one. Thinking of that day always brought a familiar pang of hurt and desperation. Cas had wanted so badly to run after Dean and tell him everything, but at the time he truly felt like he couldn’t. Of course , it didn’t take Cas long after that final meeting to realize that nothing was worth remaining trapped in a loveless relationship, but it was too late.

Cas would give almost anything to go back to that exact moment in time and slap himself across the face. How stupid could he have been? At the time he thought he had no choice, now he realized there was always a choice.

“Hey Dean!” Cas’s head snapped up and he watched as Dean smiled briefly at the waitress. The small blonde looked happy to see him, causing a pang of jealousy to hit Cas square in the chest.

Who was this waitress and what was she to Dean? Cas had to know, even though logically he knew he didn’t have any right to. She smiled while pointing at the booth Cas sat in. Didn’t she know it was rude to point?

What a bitch.

“Hey Cas.” Cas was reminded of the actual reason he was here when Dean slid into the booth across from him.

Cas was pretty sure he couldn’t actually forget how to breathe, but in that moment he worried that it was a possibility. Dean’s piercing green eyes peered at him cautiously, and Cas found himself lost in them. He studied the beautiful man in front of him.

Dean had just a little bit of stubble and his hair was slightly longer than it was the last time Cas had seen him. His sun kissed skin was still covered in freckles. The omega could remember trying to kiss every one of them during their week together. It had been almost impossible, but he felt like he did good job of it.

Dean cleared his throat and Cas realized he was supposed to do something. He had just been staring at the man and, was a bit embarrassed to admit that he had no clue how long for.

“Hello Dean.” Cas said simply. Dean closed his eyes momentarily and swallowed. When he opened them back up there was anger swirling in the depths. An anger that Cas completely understood.

“Sooo, here you are.” Dean said, drawing out the thought.

“Here I am.” Cas agreed with the statement and looked down at his hands.

The silence stretched on for a moment before the waitress came to their table. Her smile was bright as she produced a writing pad and pen from her apron.

“What can I get you today?” She asked with a chirpy voice.

“I’ll have the usual Jo.” Dean answered, smiling easily at her. So they were on a first name basis. Cas felt the jealousy beat at his chest again as she laughed.

“You’re getting a little predictable Dean,” she answered before looking towards Cas. “And for you?” Her voice was filled with kindness.

“I’ll have your bacon burger with a coke please.”

“Sure thing sweet cheeks. Give us about fifteen.” She said before sashaying back to the kitchen.

“Gotta say Cas, I never thought I’d see you again.” Dean said staring at Cas with a hurt look.

“Well, I had always hoped to see you again.” Cas answered trying to avoid Dean’s questioning look.

“What’s that mean?” He asked, a hard edge to his tone.

“I didn’t like the way things ended... I’ve been trying to find you since- well since that day. You’re an elusive man though.” Cas said sadly.

“They ended the way you wanted them to, Cas.” Dean bit out.

“I know, and I’ll never forgive myself for that.”

“Yeah? Don’t know if I will either.” Cas looked up at Dean and was hit with the full power of his fury. His angry face portrayed the betrayal that he obviously felt.

“Dean... I couldn’t find a way out.” Cas answered desperately. They weren’t even five minutes in and he was already on the verge of tears.

“Bull shit, there’s always a way. Fuck Cas, you were the one who planned it! You were the one who begged for it!” Dean exclaimed. Cas bit his cheek and hoped that the pain would help him fight off the urge to cry.

“I know, but he was all I had ever known. I just couldn’t walk away.” Cas shifted uncomfortably under the lie, not wanting to tell Dean the truth behind his decision. Unfortunately for Cas, the alpha had always been able to call his bluff.

“That’s not true. You spent years without him before and he was gone all the time. Just like he is now. No alpha would just let their mate meet some random guy they fucked for a week. At least no sane alpha.” Dean said angrily.

Cas looked at Dean confused. He wasn’t sure what the man was talking about. Dean didn’t give him enough time to ask before he went off again.

“Do you think I’m a fool Cas? You think you can come here and tell me you’d been looking for two years and all would be forgiven? What’s the matter, Cas? Have you gotten lonely in your glass fortress while Balthazar has been jetting around the world probably fucking anything that can walk on two legs? Did you think I would be jumping with excitement at the idea of being your live in companion? Well I got news for you, Cas, I’m not-“ Cas waved his hand and cut Dean off mid sentence.

“First of all, no I don’t think you’re a fool. I think you’re a lot of things but a fool isn’t one of those. Second, I grew lonely long before you walked into my apartment two years ago while Zar was fucking anything that walked on two legs. And third, I never wanted you to be a live in companion, I wanted you to be my mate.” Cas said angrily. He wasn’t mad at Dean for saying those things, as hurtful as they were, he knew he deserved all of them. He was mad at himself for making Dean feel the way he did. He was such a fuck up, and he fucked Dean up in the process.

“Well, it’s a good thing I never bit you while you were begging for it. Glad to have been of service Cas, now you can move on with your fake happiness and your miserable life with Balthazar.”

“I- we’re not- I left Zar. Shortly after I met with you I left him.” Cas said as he watched Dean’s face filled with disgust.

“So you’ve been looking for me to tell me that you what? Finally left him and came to pick up your second place prize?”

This wasn’t how Cas had planned it. Sure, he never thought that it would be sunshine and roses, but he’d never expected it to be this hard. He supposed that was idealist in him. He’d always hoped for the best and never really planned for the worst when it came to Dean.

“Dean you were never my second place prize. You were the damn grand finale.” Cas said defeatedly as he wiped angrily at the tears that were spilling down his face.

“Yeah? Sure doesn’t seem that way.” It was at this moment that Jo walked carefully up to their table and set their drinks down in front of them with a look of trepidation on her face.

“Everything alright?” She asked Dean, ready to back him up however he needed.

“Yeah, Jo, we’re just having a little chat.” Dean said glowering at Cas. She seemed to get the message and backed up slowly before shuffling away.

Cas closed his eyes and rubbed his fingers into his temple. He could feel a head ache from hell coming on and found himself wishing that this diner served something harder than soda and coffee.

Taking a deep breath, Cas kept his eyes closed and tried to gather his thoughts. There were so many things he wanted to say to Dean, so many memories he wanted to share with the man. Yet, he found himself looking at the face of a man who was completely closed off. Cas had no clue how he had the power to take something so beautiful and crush it. He ruined Dean.

“Dean, I’m sorry. I can’t put into words how sorry I am that I did this. I’ve spent every night of the past two years wondering what could have been and knowing that I’ll never get the chance to find out. I looked for you to apologize, to tell you that I was stupid and scared,” Cas looked up at Dean and begged with his eyes for the alpha to understand. “Dean, I was so fucking scared. I thought I was going to lose everything, and I couldn’t fathom having all that I had worked so hard for taken away. I realized, though, that I would rather lose every single thing in my life than continue to live a lie.” Cas took another deep breath before continuing.

“No, I didn’t come here to ask you for forgiveness, I know that’s something I’ll never get. I just came here to tell you that you’re the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me and I will never regret the moments I shared with you. You can be mad at me for the rest of your life, I deserve that, but no matter how much you hate me I will never regret you.” Cas stood and reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He grabbed a fifty dollar bill and tossed it on the table before turning and walking out quickly.

Dean sat at the booth trying to process what had just been said to him. When Jo brought both plates of food she stared at him for a moment before sitting down and eating the abandoned burger with him. She didn’t say a word, but her company was comforting.

*~*

_Cas sat on one end of the couch wrapped under a blanket while Zar sat on the other. The TV played some rerun of a game show that neither men were paying attention to. The silence that sat between them was deafening._

_Zar sighed and muted the show. The small movement caught Cas’s eye and he looked over at the man. His face wore an expression of anger that instantly put Cas even more on edge than he had been in the past four weeks._

_“What?” Zar snapped at Cas. He pulled the blanket up to his chin, he thought that maybe this thin fabric would form a boundary of protection._

_“I didn’t say anything.” Cas answered quietly and redirected his gaze towards the television, trying to get Zar to leave whatever conversation he wanted to have unopened._

_“That’s the problem. You haven’t said a damn thing all day. You’re sulking around like a bloody teenager and I’m sick of it.” Zar threw the channel changer across the room. Cas flinched instinctively._

_“Zar, please. I don’t have anything to say.” Cas said as he closed his eyes and tried to prevent the impending panic._

_“Oh please, I know you Cas. Your silence is punishment and I’m sick of it. You’ve been distant.” Cas felt his cheeks redden with anger as he listened to what Zar had to say._

_“I’ve been distant? You’ve been distant for a whole fucking year!” Cas yelled, letting the anger wash over him._

_“What do you expect, Cas? I moved here for you! I rented this apartment for you! I settled down for you! Everything is for you!” Zar stood, his body tense with pent up rage._

_“I told you that you didn’t have to move here, Zar. I could have come to you, so don’t you dare put that on me.”_

_“Oh please, you think that I wanted you to move to me so you could hold one more thing over my head?” Zar spat with disgust._

_“I don’t hold anything over your head!”_

_“Sure, do you think I’m blind or just stupid? I see the way you act every time I leave for work. I’m trying to build us a better life and all you can think about is your own damn self.”_

_“So now I’m horrible for wanting to spend time with you? And let’s not forget what you’re holding over my fucking head right now!” Cas exclaimed. He was hyperventilating as Zar walked up to him and placed his hands on either side of Cas’s shoulders, the Brit leaned in until they were inches apart._

_“I would rather lay down and die than watch you leave me for some whore. I’m out there working my ass off to provide us a better life while you’re here whittling at some fucking wood and letting some random alpha get in your head! I’ve never had second thoughts even when much better opportunities have presented themselves, literally and figuratively.” Zar’s eyes widened minutely as he stood over Cas._

_“Is that what you’ve been doing all this time? Looking for some better omega hole to fuck?” Cas asked, the hurt and humiliation bleeding into his voice. Zar, for his part, looked sad before his face took on a rocky edge._

_“Oh please, like you didn’t know.” He said before standing and turning his back to Cas._

_“Oh my god.” Cas said brokenly before burying his face in his hands and sobbing._

_“Cut the shit Cassie. You’ve been spending the past year trying to convince me to mate you, breed you, and make you into a good little omega. We both knew there was a reason I wasn’t doing it.” Zar said bitterly._

_“Fuck you,” Cas said quietly as he stood and paced around the room. “Fuck you for telling me that you loved me, fuck you for alienating me from my friends and family, fuck you for leaving me here while you went around the world fucking some random bitch! You can tell the whole fucking world for all I care, tell them about me, take my business from me, ruin my name. I don’t give a shit anymore. You’ve taken almost everything I have, might as well take the rest of it.” Cas said angrily as he walked back to the bedroom and grabbed a duffle bag._

_“I know you can’t drag Dean through the dirt, I read the contract the you signed. Everything he does is confidential, and punishable by law of you beak it.” Cas yelled from the bedroom knowing that it would carry to wherever Zar was at._

_“Yeah, I’ve been doing my homework. You can throw me to the wolves all you want Zar, but you signed a fucking contract stating you couldn’t to Dean.” Zar walked into the bedroom angrily._

_“And you mean to tell me that he’s the only thing holding you back?” Zar said quietly, lethally._

_“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m telling you. So drag my name down, I don’t fucking care anymore! I’m leaving, I hope you have a shitty life.” Cas said before shoving more clothes into his bag._

_“Let’s not forget who’s name is on the deed to your shop, the title to your car, and everything else you own, for that matter.” Cas laughed manically._

_“Take it! All of it!” Cas screamed as he grabbed his phone and dialed Gabe’s number. His brother answered within three rings._

_“Go for Gabe.” He answered and Cas felt himself sigh with relief._

_“Gabe, I need you to come get me now please.” Cas said shortly, he could hear his brother breathing on the other end causing a moment of silence before there was a shuffle in the background._

_“I’ll be there in five minutes,” Gabe said as Cas could hear the door shutting in the background. “I swear to god if that fucker hurt you, Cas, I’m going to bury him.” He bit out before hanging up._

_Cas threw his phone on the bed and walked towards the guest room. There were a few clothes he kept stored in there that he wanted to take along._

_Nobody had entered the room after Dean left. Cas was instantly hit with the scent of his alpha, but instead of bringing him comfort it made him want to cry. What had he done?_

_He pulled the shirts from their hangers angrily as he looked around the room. Everything was left the way it had been before Dean had arrived. Other than his scent, there was no trace that the alpha had even been there. A small piece of paper tucked under one of the pillows caught Cas’s eyes. He wandered towards it slowly and pulled it out from behind the object hiding it._

_There were two pages folded together neatly. On those pages was the large script of a person who was never meant to write in between the lines. It was addressed to Cas and signed from Dean._

_Cas wanted to read it right then, wanted to sit down on the bed and see what Dean had thought was so important that he wrote it down instead of just telling him, but he knew he couldn’t. There wasn’t enough time. So he stuffed it in his pocket quickly for fear that Zar would come in and snatch it from his hands._

_There was a loud commotion outside the room and Cas could pick out Gabe’s voice saying something. He quickly stuffed the shirts into his duffle and walked towards the living room._

_“- you fucking slimy piece of shit!” Gabe finished whatever sentence he had been spitting at Zar. Though they would never say the words, Cas’s siblings had been waiting anxiously for the moment he finally decided he’d had enough of the Brit._

_“Oh come off it Gabe. All of you Novaks are fucking blinded by stupidity.” Zar said with a bored tone._

_“Gabe, let’s go.” Cas pleaded. His older brother turned towards him and frowned. Cas could only imagine how he looked. The last time Gabe had seen him was three weeks ago and Cas had actually put effort into looking normal then. Now his scruff was a full on beard, his cheeks were sunken in from lack of eating, and there was undoubtedly tear stains going down his cheeks._

_“What did he do?” Gabe asked slowly, anger laced in his tone._

_“Doesn’t matter, I just need to go.” Cas said desperately._

_“Cut the dramatics Cas.” Zar snapped. Gabe stepped up, his chest puffed out as he backed the alpha up against a counter._

_“Don’t you dare talk to him like that,” Gabe pushed a finger into Zar’s chest. “You approach him again, you so much as look at him, I’ll fucking bury you. You hear? I may be a beta, but I ain’t no bitch.”_

_Cas was already walking out the the door and knew without a doubt that his brother would be following close behind. The ride to Gabe’s house was silent. The tension of the night was weighing down on Cas and he suddenly felt exhausted. He just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep until he forgot everything._

_When Gabe pulled into the driveway he shut the car off and turned to look at Cas expectantly. He couldn’t talk about it, though. Not tonight at least, tonight he just wanted to curl into a ball and cry over everything he lost._

_Suddenly Cas began laughing hysterically remembering something his brother had said. Gabe looked at him questioningly while he tried to gain his composure. When he was finally able to look at Gabe he began laughing again._

_“I may be a beta but I ain’t bitch?” Cas began laughing hysterically as Gabe glowered at him._

_“I couldn’t think of anything,” Gabe whined before he started laughing with Cas. “Oh shut up, it wasn’t that funny.” He said before slamming the car door and walking inside, a laughing Cas following behind him._

 


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is nigh! I don’t know if it will actually make it to fifteen chapters, but I will keep you guys updated. There’s no longer going to be flashbacks, the past has been told.
> 
> Thank you guys for your support! I appreciate all the comments and kudos!

Chapter Eleven

Dean stared at the empty plate numbly before he looked at Jo. She smiled at him kindly before placing her hand on top of his and squeezing.

“That him?” She asked, already knowing the answer. Dean nodded as he tried to avoid Jo’s disapproving eyes.

“I say this with as much love as possible: Dean Winchester you are a dick.” Dean gave her a small smile before shaking his head.

“I don’t know what to do, Jo. He told me he’d always been looking for me and I just lost it. He’s the one who wanted to end things, told me I needed to give him space. I gave him space Jo, and now I find out it was for nothing.” Dean shook his head as he felt his anger seeping out of his body to be replaced with a pit of worry.

“Dean you’ve been happy here, had time to grow and think in one of the most beautiful places this world has to offer. You were able to mourn your loss,” Jo sighed as she picked at a fry on the plate in front of her. “I get that you’re angry, I understand that he broke your heart, but that doesn’t mean that he’s not hurting too. I just can’t help but feel like what just happened here was a major fuck up.” Dean shook his head and closed his eyes.

“Did I ever tell you that when I first met you I had the biggest crush on you?” Jo laughed as she thought about the first time Dean walked into the diner. She had been so shocked that she had to have another waitress serve him even though he was in her section.

“Didn’t have to say it, it was written all over your face.” Dean laughed as Jo turned red.

“Shut up,” Jo laughed as she threw a fry at his face. “I could barely even talk to you, until I found out that you were an ass hole.” She laughed as Dean glared at her.

“Am not.” He said petulantly.

“Are to. I get it, though, big strong alpha needs to be tough at all times, emotions aren’t acceptable. Sometimes, though, it’s ok to be weak. It’s ok to want something, it’s it’s ok to need something, and it’s definitely ok to let it show,” Jo looked at Dean sternly. “It’s not ok, however, to treat people like shit. No matter how bad you hurt, no matter how confused you are, it’s not ok.” Dean sighed and looked at Jo. She had a fierce set to her face and was definitely playing the part of the scolding mother.

“I don’t know what to do, Jo.” Dean said quietly.

“You know, you say that an awful lot. I think you do know, though, you’re just too damn scared to do it,” Jo said as she began gathering the plates. “I’ll make a suggestion though: get down on your knees and grovel.”

*

Cas sat in the rental car and stared out the window. He couldn’t leave, didn’t have the energy to turn the key or make the drive back to the rental house. He wasn’t sure what he had expected, but he hadn’t thought Dean would be so harsh. It was wishful thinking, he realized, that they might have walked out of there happy and together.

He held onto some hope that one day they would find their way back together for so long that it was hard to accept that it obviously wasn’t going to happen. Cas knew that he’d hurt Dean, he just never realized how badly.

There was a quiet tap on the passenger window and when he looked over he sucked in a breath and rolled the window down.

“Come to chew me out some more?” Cas asked, the hurt bleeding into his words. Dean looked down at the ground and sighed.

“I - shouldn’t have done that. You didn’t deserve it.” Dean mumbled, the tips of his ears turning red.

“Yeah, I kind of did.” Cas sighed before leaning his head back on the headrest and closing his eyes.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. I didn’t ask to see you so I could be a dick.” Cas rolled his head towards Dean and raised his eyebrows questioningly before unlocking the door.

Dean didn’t hesitate when he opened the door and jumped in. Cas rolled up the window and was acutely aware of how their scents mixed together. He gripped his fingers tight on the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white.

“I just don’t understand. I don’t know how I could change almost every detail of my life and yet here you are. I thought you wanted space, so I gave it to you and then you tell me you’ve been looking for me this whole time. Why?” Cas rolled his eyes, he’d forgotten how little Dean thought of himself. Of course he didn’t know why the omega was looking for him even though he spelled it out for him.

“Did you not hear me in the diner? I want you Dean. Do I deserve you? Probably not, but it doesn’t change how I’ve felt for the past two years,” Cas watched as Dean fiddled with his hands. “I figured today wasn’t going to go that great, I just wanted the chance to tell how I felt.” They sat in comfortable silence for a moment before Dean looked over at Cas.

“Why did you need space Cas? I get that you didn’t want to see me anymore, but I never bugged you, I just don’t get why you told me that.” Dean said dejectedly.

“Dean, I told you that because I was afraid of how I would react if I saw you again. I was worried that I if I ran into you I wouldn’t be able to leave you again.” Cas frowned.

“Would that have been such a bad thing?” Dean asked, his voice small.

“At the time, yes,” Cas paused and looked away from Dean before taking a deep breath. “I told Zar I was planning on leaving the day he got home. He laughed at me and asked how I planned on doing that. His name was on everything, my shop, my trademark, my car. Everything I owned was in his name, but I didn’t care about that as much as what he said he was going to do to you.” Cas shook his head remembering how scared he was those last few weeks with Zar.

“He couldn’t have hurt me Cas.” Dean said quietly. Cas laughed and smiled at Dean.

“I figured that one out too late it seems, he told me he was going to the news with a story of infidelity involving an ‘alpha whore,’ he was going to plaster our names everywhere. I couldn’t let him do that, Dean. You had wanted something so much better than being a companion, and even though it’s an acceptable thing to do, I know how hard it is to get work elsewhere once you’ve been labeled. I just wanted you to be able to do what you wanted to.

“That’s why I told you I needed space. I could handle my life being hell, but I couldn’t do that to you. How could you possibly love me if I ruined your life in the process of getting to you?” Cas said sadly. Dean turned in his seat and touched Cas’s hand faintly.

“I think it would have been pretty damn easy.” Dean sighed before pulling his hand back. Cas wanted to cry out, beg for Dean’s touch again. Instead, he just stared in Dean’s eyes.

“I left him, maybe a week after we met, I found the contract he signed. There was a confidentiality clause in it that I hadn’t known about. I was so happy when I saw it, he couldn’t touch you even if he wanted to.

“The night I left he told me he’d been cheating on me the whole time, so you were right in your assumption back in the diner. I think I always knew, but it hurt so badly for him to actually fess up. I went to live with Gabe for a little bit. It took Zar two days to put a restraining order against me, I couldn’t come within two hundred feet of him or his property.”

“So your shop?”

“Gone. Everything was gone. Just as promised he took the story to the news, he had housewives eating out of his hands. I was this ‘pathetic excuse of an omega’ who used Zar to heighten my social status and business. I had customers contact me wanting to return my work because they saw the story and couldn’t fathom having a piece by me. It was humiliating.” Cas wipes at his eyes before folding his hands neatly in his lap.

“I should have been there.” Dean said angrily. His self hatred painted over his features as he grimaced out the window.

“No, you really shouldn’t have. I asked you to go, and even though I didn’t mean disappear off the face of the earth, I certainly was glad you didn’t have to witness the mess.” Cas smiled sadly at Dean.

“What happened after all that?” Dean asked. Cas wrung his hands nervously as he avoided Dean’s stare.

“I looked for you. I had money saved up in a separate account that Zar didn’t have access to. I started in Lawrence, thought you would still be there. I went to the agency, but Dorothy told me that they couldn’t give your information out, which made sense. After that I hired a PI, it took him a couple months to find out that there was slim to no possibility you were still in town. After that I just went looking,” Cas sighed and smiled at Dean, knowing that he sounded every bit the crazy ex that he was. “I went to the places you told me about when we were together: Galveston, Charleston, Seattle, New York, and more. New York was definitely a bust, I don’t know why I thought I’d be able to find you in that fish bowl.” Cas laughed as he remembered being in New York for six weeks trying to find Dean. It had been useless.

“Some places I would get close to you, or so I thought, but it would always fall through. I just kept going to the next stop, hoping that you would just be there.”

“You found me here though?” Dean asked curiously, wondering how Cas would have even thought of this place.

“I found you, but I wasn’t looking for you,” Cas smiled at Dean who looked surprised. “Anna and Gabe wanted to go on vacation, I think this was supposed to be an intervention. I’ve been running out of money for some time now, my guess is they brought me here to tell me it was time to let go. Then Anna came home from the hardware store and I could smell you. I couldn’t be sure because it was mixed with her scent, but there were traces of it. What?” Cas asked when he saw Dean smiling at him.

“When I was at the store I could smell you. I was running around like a mad man trying to find the source before I saw Anna. It was faint, but it was there.” Cas laughed lightly before taking a breath and smiling back at Dean.

“Our biology never forgets.” Cas said to which Dean nodded in response.

“When I saw you in my back yard I thought I was losing my damn mind,” Dean said quietly. “I’ve been working on forgetting, I figured it was my mind’s way of telling me where to shove it.” He shook his head before looking back at Cas.

“What about you? What have you been doing?” Cas asked, desperately wanting to keep the conversation going.

“Well, you were my last client. I took vacation right after I left your apartment to help my uncle at his auto shop. After we met in the park I was lost for a little bit. I wasn’t reporting to the agency or the shop, I just stayed home and laid in bed for a while.

“One day I woke up and said fuck it. Packed my bags in the trunk of my car and left after telling my family good bye. I didn’t think there was much left for Lawrence to offer me.

“I drove for four months. Went to most of the places you mentioned, but none of them felt right. I’d stay there for a week, maybe two tops, and then I’d hit the road again. When I first came here I was on my way to New York, but when I got my first peek at the ocean I knew I was done.

“I was able to buy a decent house close to the ocean for a small price. I’ve been a beach bum ever since. I work, I’m a handy man, have my own business actually. I think I’m considered a local now, though you never know with places like this.” Dean smiled. Cas could feel his heart beating out of control, Dean was good. He was happy, if not a little heartbroken, but ultimately he was happy. That was all Cas had ever wanted.

“I’m so glad to hear that, Dean.” He said sincerely. Dean frowned at him before taking a deep breath.

“I miss you a lot. See your eyes in the ocean, think of you when I see a happy couple walking by, picture you carving a masterpiece whenever I look at some piece of wood work. That smell, though, I could never remember it quite right. So much better than I’d imagined.” He said shyly.

“I miss you too, Dean.” Cas answered, he didn’t have to think about it, just knew that the ache of losing Dean had never been something he was able to get over.

“You ever wondered what would have happened if we stuck it out, actually gave ourselves a shot?” Dean asked thoughtfully. Cas smiled at him sadly.

“All the time.” He answered. Dean smiled back.

“Yeah, me too,” Dean shook his head before opening the door. Cas fought the urge to ask him stay. He wanted to grab Dean and never let him go. “I’ve got to go Cas, but- well, I was wondering how long you’d be here?”

“We’re here for another week.” Cas answered looking at Dean with confusion.

“I was thinking,” Dean said as he rubbed at his neck nervously. “If you want to, we can meet up again. I can show you all the cool spots tourists love.” Dean refused to look up to see Cas’s reaction, he was afraid of what he might see.

“That would be good.” Cas answered and smiled when Dean looked up at him with happiness.

“Yeah?” Dean asked and Cas laughed.

“Yes Dean, I would enjoy that.”

“Alright Cas, just text me when you have time. I’m free all week.” Dean smiled before waving at Cas and shutting the door to the car.

Cas stared out the window for a moment and debated what had just happened. They’d had a good talk and he wanted to believe that maybe there was hope for them in the future. He still wanted Dean in his life, even if was just as a friend.

Before he could change his mind he pulled out his phone. Cas didn’t care if it made him look desperate, at this point he kind of was.

Cas 2:03 PM: Hey Dean, would you mind   
showing me around tomorrow?

Dean 2:04 PM: Yeah Cas, meet me at my   
place at 10?

Cas 2:04 PM: I’ll see you then :).

 


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I read some of the comments and decided to add an angle to the story that I wasn’t planning on. I’m still shooting for fifteen chapters and think I can easily make it with the new twist.
> 
> I do appreciate all the comments and feedback. This story does have a happy ending - that’s not going to change. 
> 
> Thank you guys for taking the time to read!

Chapter Twelve

Cas stared at the supplies pensively, his bottom lip caught between his teeth as he debated his next move. If he didn’t work on it he risked suffering through more worried glances from his siblings. If he did work on it he risked suffering through excited glances from his siblings. He wondered which emotion he would be able to handle more?

Anna was true to her word, every piece he would need in order to make a bird house sat on a work bench in the rental’s garage. It would be a relatively simple project, he wouldn’t need anything heavy duty to finish it. There would be no use for power tools, he would really only need manual tools to carry out the tasks.

Cas had owned a large shop in downtown Lawrence. There was a work room in the back that housed many of his creations. He used to spend hours in the back surrounded by sawdust and tools. It was where he felt safest.

The front of the place housed an office, somewhere that ‘respectable people could visit’ as Meg liked to put it. She had played the role of his office manager. She dealt with the people while Cas stayed in the back. He’d always been appreciative of her ability to intercept any customer and keep them from asking him too many questions. People made him nervous.

Cas found himself longing for another place to hide, somewhere he could forget about the world outside and just do what he loved. Not that he’d had much inspiration lately. It had been close to a year since he last made something new. Luckily Meg still kept his online website up and every once in a while someone would buy one of his dwindling pieces he was able to save before Balthazar empties the shop out. It gave him just enough to keep his accounts somewhat padded, but not near enough.

Not enough to pay the bills, and definitely not enough to keep up his hapless search for Dean, but that was over now. Cas thought of all the towns he’d seen over that past two years and wondered what it would have been like to find the other man in the beginning. Most people said it was the journey that mattered, helped individuals grow.

Cas shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts as he pulled his pocket knife out and began whittling at a smaller piece of wood. He thought of Dean and his beautiful green eyes staring out at the ocean for countless hours. He wondered what it would be like to sit next to the man on the beach and watch the sunset over the waves.

Cas could almost feel Dean’s strong arms wrap around him to offer warmth when the evening became just a little too chilly. The sounds of the ocean the background music to their talk.

Cas wondered what it would have been like to run with Dean. What their life could be right now if he packed his belongings into the back of Dean’s Impala and left everything behind. Then again, would that really have been the best thing?

Though he’d spent the better part of the last two years searching for Dean, he’d also spent them finding himself. He went to the Statue of Liberty and had seen all the museums Washington DC had to offer. He went deep sea fishing in Newport Bay and spent an afternoon laughing with the captain and deckhand of the ship as they told him harrowing stories of going out to sea. He’d ate gumbo in Louisiana, toured the Warther Museum in Ohio (a personal favorite of his), and rode the ferris wheel at the Eastern Idaho State Fair. That wasn’t even scratching the surface of his adventures. Sure, he had spent time looking for Dean, but he never took a moment of it for granted.

Cas learned a lot about himself in those two years. He found that he was strong, kind, and smart. He’d even started taking business classes at a local college online. He went on a couple dates that ended in failure, and he became at peace with the fact that he wasn’t an average omega. He was much more than that. He’d even mage a tradition of serving Thanksgiving dinner at a homeless shelter alongside Anna and Gabe, and afterwards they would spend hours talking about how thankful they were for what they had.

Cas learned that he was enough. That he could be alone and happy, even if it meant forging his life without a partner. It was ok. He was ok. He was even happy, for the most part.

Cas watched as the small piece began taking the shape of a wave. He would need to sand it down to make the sculpture smooth to the touch, but even he had to admit he was impressed with his first piece after a hiatus.

He startled when he felt a hand gently squeeze his shoulder. Anna smiled at him with quiet appreciation as she appraised the piece still cradled in his hands.

“Hey.” She said as she reached out and touched the wave with trepidation.

“How long have you been here?” Cas asked, wondering if she had been watching for long.

“Not very long, came to find you just as you were finishing up. It’s beautiful Castiel.” She smiled at him with tears in her eyes.

“It’s not finished yet.” He grumbled as he placed the figure on the work bench and pocketed his knife before enveloping his sister in a hug. She squeezed him before patting his back and smiling.

“Gabe and I thought we would order some pizza, maybe watch a movie. Does that sound good?” Anna asked as she began walking towards the door.

“Yeah, sounds great.” Cas smiled back and found himself overwhelmed with gratification for his siblings. They had been there for him the whole time, picking up the pieces of him that had been knocked down.

“Well that’s good cause I already ordered.” Gabe said laughing as he stood in the opened doorway to the garage.

Cas looked at Anna questioningly and she shrugged her shoulders sheepishly.

“We knew you’d never say to no to a Hawaiian pizza.” She smiled and disappeared inside.

“You have a second?” Gabe asked, as he stepped down into the garage not waiting for an answer.

“What’s going on?” Cas asked, very rarely did he see his brother with such a serious look on his face.

“The lawyer called today while you were out with Dean. She said she found some old pictures of Balthazar that are dated and a partner that’s willing to step forward to strengthen the case.” Gabe said quietly gauging Cas’s reaction.

“Ok.” Cas said pointedly looking away from his older brother. He knew that Gabe would want to talk about the lawsuit on this trip, he just didn’t know if he had the energy to.

“This is a good thing Cas, all we’re waiting for is the go ahead from you.” Gabe said sternly as he stepped around so they were looking at each other.

“Can’t we just enjoy the evening?” Cas asked tiredly.

“No, we can’t. At least not until we’ve talked about this Cas. You’ve been dodging me for a long time and I need an answer.” Gabe glared as he ran a hand through his hair.

“I just don’t see the point, it’s over now so why can’t we just move along?” Cas asked petulantly.

“Oh I don’t know Cas, maybe because Balthazar drained your joint accounts? Maybe because he changed the locks on the apartment before you could get everything you owned? Maybe because he took all your tools and sculptures that were in the shop, and drug your name through the dirt? He slandered you Cas! He should be held accountable for his part in this!” Gabe exclaimed with frustration.

“I know Gabe, I just don’t want to go through this whole process again.” Cas sighed. He could think of a million things he’d rather do than sit in a room with Zar and his lawyers.

“Cas, he’s done nothing but benefit from your demise when you did nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong in the first place. It’s only fair that you get your share of the belongings you two had together and pay for the pain and suffering that he’s caused.” Gabe was angry. Cas could see the lines drawing across his face tightly as he began making large gestures with his hand.

“We have a solid case, the lawyer even said it. You would know if you had any interest in getting justice for yourself.” Cas glared back at Gabe with ill contained anger.

“You’d think my lack of interest would be sign enough that I don’t fucking care! He ruined my life, Gabe, I just want to move forward!” Cas yelled.

He knew, of course, that he could easily win a case against Balthazar if he chose to sue him. His hesitation came from the fact that he didn’t want to revisit that part of his life. Cas had no desire to be in the same room as the man who once claimed to love him and then so easily ruined him. He didn’t want to see Balthazar’s slimy smile as he appraised how good he’d done at dragging Cas down.

It wasn’t as if he didn’t want to make the man pay. Cas just didn’t want to be put through the ringer in the process.

“I get it Cas,” Gabe said quietly as he placed a tentative hand on Cas’s shoulder. “I get that you don’t want to see him again, but he has to pay for what he did.” Gabe finished.

“I don’t know if I can do it.” Cas said defeatedly as he looked at the ground.

“How about this - talk to the lawyer. Let her explain how things will happen, you haven’t even heard the lady’s name. Just talk to her, and if you still feel like you don’t want to move forward I’ll drop it and never talk about it again.” Gabe asked with the full power of his pout. Cas sighed and threw his hands up in defeat.

“Fine. I’ll talk to her, but if I don’t like it I’m backing out.” Gabe smiled ruefully as he clapped his hands.

“I’ll take it,” Gabe said as he smacked Cas on the back. “Let’s go eat some pizza!”

Cas was left staring after his brother as he practically ran out of the garage. He shook his head and sighed as he made his way slowly back inside.

*

“You need cooling, baby I’m not fooling. I’m gonna send ya, back to schoolin,” Dean sang out as he checked the oven to make sure his bacon hadn’t burnt. Charlie sat at the counter smiling as she watched him dance around the kitchen making blueberry pancakes and taking gulps out of his coffee cup. “ Waaaay down inside, honey you need it. I’m gonna give you my love, I’m gonna give my love.” He continued flipping a pancake high in the air and catching it in the frying pan.

Charlie was pissed at him when he first told her who he’d gone out to see. She couldn’t help the overwhelming feeling of protection that dominated her emotions at the mention of Cas’s name. All it took was Dot telling her to calm the hell down and look at her best friend for her to actually see the happiness written all over his face.

“Wanna whole lot of love, wanna whole lotta love.” He continued signing the lyrics to one of his favorite Zep songs with a giant smile on his face.

She had to admit that his joy spread around the house, giving it a lightness she’d never seen in the place before. It was nice to see him smiling with true happiness for once.

It wasn’t that Dean wasn’t happy, it was just that he wasn’t the happy his friends and family had loved. He was subdued, and no matter how many times Charlie told him there was someone else out there for him, she knew he worried. She tried so hard to convince him to stay in Lawrence, if not for himself for his family. It didn’t matter what she said, though, he still left in a flourish.

Charlie knew that Dean loved his home. He liked living by the ocean, as shocking as that was to find out. He liked that he had made a name for himself in a town where no one would associate him with being a companion. He liked the anonymity of it, and she had a feeling that even if nothing had fell to shit two years ago she would still find him living by the beach now. It was his own piece of heaven on earth.

“Earth to Charlie.” Dean said as he put a stack of pancakes in front of her followed by a plate piled high with bacon.

“What do you want Winchester?” She smiled as he spun in a flourish and ran his hands through his hair, trying to smooth it down.

“Cas is here, I’m going to get the door and I expect you to be on your best behavior.” He scolded as he walked towards the front door.

“You’re not my mom Dean!” She shouted as he laughed.

*

Dean ran his hands over his shirt to make sure it was laying down correctly. He groaned as he noticed a patch of flour on the black material before pulling the door open, there was nothing he could do now.

Cas stood on his front step looking awkward and anxious as he fiddled with his own clothes. Dean smiled warmly as the omega looked up at him and blushed.

“Hello Dean.” Cas mumbled as he shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Hey Cas.” Dean sighed. Jesus he sounded like a lovesick puppy.

It was all worth it when Cas smiled back at him and followed him inside. Dean did a scan of the house, he’d spent hours cleaning the place up last night knowing that the other man would be there today. It wasn’t anything amazing, Dean had always said it was a poor man’s house in a rich man’s neighborhood, but it was his home and he was proud of it. He just hoped that Cas liked it.

He watched Cas’s face with a carefully schooled expression as the other man appraised his surroundings. When Dean was met with a smile, he let out the breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.

“This is a beautiful home, Dean.” Cas said genuinely. It made something stir inside Dean that he didn’t want to think about just yet.

“Thanks Cas, it isn’t much but it’s mine.” Dean said as he led Cas out the back door and onto his deck.

“Wow.” Cas whispered as he looked out at the ocean.

“Yeah, this right here is the whole reason I bought it.” Dean smiled as he watched the waves roll in before turning towards Cas.

“I can see why,” Cas said as he looked at Dean. “What do you have planned for today?” He asked curiously. Dean gave him a big smile and launched into the day’s events.

“I figured we could go to the board walk, a couple shops downtown that I think you’ll like, and then the light house. We gotta start with breakfast though.” Dean said resolutely.

“It is the most important meal of the day.” Cas shrugged as he started walking back inside, before he could get a step in Dean had caught his wrist in one of his hands. Cas looked back at the man and took a deep breath, just that one touch sent a frenzy of butterflies off in his stomach.

“I, uh, well we’ll have breakfast with Charlie and Dorothy but then we’ll do those other things just the two of us.” Dean said, his cheeks turning red.

“That sounds amazing Dean.” Cas said gently. They were both very aware of the fact that Dean had yet to let go of his grip on Cas’s wrist.

“I’m just... I’m really happy that you’re here.” Dean said as he dropped his hold and looked away. Cas smiled and opened the door.

“Me too, Dean.” He said happily as he walked into the house.  
  
*

Breakfast had been good once Charlie quit glaring daggers at Cas. At one point while she was grilling him with questions he saw her flinch. He was pretty sure someone had kicked her under the table.

After the animosity faded, Cas found himself relaxing and enjoying the easy conversation that flowed throughout the room. Dean and Charlie fought over the last piece of bacon until she said something about being a queen, which seemed to win her the battle. Cas couldn’t help but laugh at the way Dean pouted for the next ten minutes.

“It’s bacon Dean.” Cas said as the other man grumbled while they did the dishes.

“Yeah Cas, that’s the point.” Dean said with a look defeat on his face.

They stayed at the house for a few moments after breakfast before leaving in Dean’s Impala to go to the boardwalk. Cas had been amazed at all the little shops that lined the walkway. There were bars, restaurants, an arcade, a tarot reading shop, and souvenir places. Cas pulled Dean into almost every one of the places and spent hours looking at the trinkets.

When they finally made it to the pier, they sat on a bench and watched as people fished. Dean smiled and waved at some people while answering questions for others. He was every bit the local here and it was easy to tell him apart from the tourists.

“You know I learned to surf here.” Dean smiled at Cas’s unbelieving face.

“I don’t believe you for one second.” Cas said as he laughed at the blush overcoming Dean’s face.

“It’s true! Hayden owns that little surf shop we passed earlier and he taught me how to when I first moved here. He said I’m a natural.” Dean said proudly as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I have a hard time imagining you surfing.” Cas said as he pictured Dean out on the water.

“Better believe it, Cas, I’ve been told that when I let my hair get just a little longer I look like a real Cali surfer.” Dean laughed as Cas raised his eyebrow.

“It’s true, he’s pretty good.” A woman said as she walked towards them.

“Pretty good my ass.” Dean scoffed. She was standing in front of them and Cas couldn’t help but notice how she stared directly at him with an intrigued face.

“What’s your name sugar?” She asked sweetly.

“This is Cas, Cas this is Missouri. Best damn cook in the town.” Dean said proudly as he smiled at the woman with adoration. She had a kind face that instantly drew Cas in.

“Well Cas, it’s nice to finally meet you.” Missouri said with warmth. Dean groaned beside Cas and buried his head in hands.

“Are you really doing this right now?” Dean asked with a slight tone of embarrassment.

“Dean Winchester, you know that when duty calls I must act. Now quit pretending to be a petulant child and go get this man a bottle of water, he’s obviously thirsty.” Missouri scolded. Cas went to protest but she shot him look that said the command wasn’t up for discussion. Dean stood and smiled apologetically at Cas before walking away.

“You got some stuff going don’t you, sweetie?” Missouri asked kindly as she settled in next to Cas. He looked at her with confusion before shaking his head.

“No. Does Dean talk about me?” Cas asked, embarrassed at what might have been said about him.

“Oh no sweetie, never heard of you until today, well at least not from Dean,” she laughed lightly as she patted his knee. “Oh, and there’s no lying to me. Might as well tell me what you’re worried about, I already know.” Cas found himself leaning towards unconsciously.

“I, uh, I don’t understand.” Cas said as she laughed again with nothing but warmth. It helped ease the embarrassment he felt washing over him.

“You’re worried over something, but you don’t have anything to be worried about. Your path is a good one. So tell me, who is this ‘Zar’ to you?” Cas felt his mouth drop as he stared at her. How did she know his nick name for Balthazar?

“He’s an ex.” Cas said stiffly. He shifted uncomfortably as she stared at him with understanding.

“Ahh, ok,” Missouri sighed as she stared out at the ocean. “You’re going to find some closure here, honey, it’s hard not to in a place like this. But, it’s important to face our demons without fear. The only way you can truly move on is by proving to yourself, no one else, that you’re not afraid anymore.”

“What do you mean?” Cas asked. He wondered how she knew so much about him but claimed to have never talked about him before.

“The lawsuit, sweetie. You don’t want the money, but you’ll get more than just a settlement from it.” She smiled at him and stood as Dean approached with a bottle of water in hand.

“Are you done freaking him out?” Dean asked with a slightly teasing, but protective, tone.

“You know me, Dean, can’t help it,” She smiled and hugged Dean before turning to face Cas. “Just go into it with an open mind.” She smiled kindly before walking away and leaving a confused Cas behind.

 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I appreciate all the comments and kudos!

Chapter Thirteen

“Hey Sammy.” Dean smiled as he listened to his brother sigh with annoyance on the other end.

“I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that’s not my name.” Sam feigned anger even with humor in his voice.

“Whatever bitch, you’ll always be little Sammy to me.” 

“I’m bigger than you, Dean.” Sam said matter of factly. 

“Yeah and half a million other people, you moose. Doesn’t change that I’m the older and better looking brother.” Dean laughed.

“Whatever jerk. Hey, I have to ask you something.” Sam said with a serious tone. Dean perked up as he sat down on the couch preparing himself for whatever Sam was going to say next. 

“Do you remember that time Rhonda Hurley made you wear her panties and bragged about it at school the next day?” Sam busted out laughing as Dean groaned.

“Yeah, keep yacking about it you asshole, you’ll get yours one day.” Dean glared at the window. 

“There’s a lot I would do for Jess, but wearing her underwear isn’t one of them.” Sam said proudly as he laughed.

“Shut up,” Dean said petulantly before continuing. “Did you call me for any real reason?” 

“Yeah, I did actually. Mom said you found Cas?” Dean groaned. Of course Mary couldn’t keep this quiet, he’d be shocked if his whole family didn’t know by now.

“Yeah, he found me technically.” Dean said as he picked at a string on the couch. 

“And?” Sam said expectantly.

“And what? We talked and hung out, had a great time. Don’t know what else there is to say.” Other than the fact that Cas was coming over soon so Dean could take him swimming in the ocean. That definitely wasn’t worth mentioning.

“Come on Dean. Tell me what’s going on in that brain of yours.” Sam demanded. Dean rolled his eyes and sighed.

“I don’t know, Sammy. We’re definitely true mates, but that doesn’t mean anything. There’s a lot of bad there.” Dean tried not to think of what that meant. He wanted so badly to be with Cas, had since the moment he’d laid eyes on him two years ago, but he didn’t know if they could overcome all of the anger. Part of him wanted to believe in fate, like Mary had said, but the other part of him said this was the universe’s way of taunting him. Always putting Cas just close enough that Dean wouldn’t be able too reach out and grasp. 

“There’s good too, though.” Sam said quietly and Dean scoffed at the fleeting sentiment.

“Yeah, well there’s a lot less of that.” He answered defeatedly. 

“Anyway, I wanted to tell you that I’ve got an interview for an internship in Lawrence.” Sam said, changing the subject easily. 

Dean smiled and felt a swell of pride for his little brother. He was the top of his class and it made sense that some lawyer would want to get a hold of him before anyone else did.

“That’s awesome Sammy, congrats man.” 

“I’m excited, it’s not set yet so don’t say anything to Mom. Don’t need her fussing about it.” Dean nodded his head in agreement. He knew that if anyone mentioned it to Mary she would start planning activities for the summer and taking Sam shopping for proper dress attire.

“If you get it will Jess come?” Dean wondered how the two would do if they had to live at a distance from each other. They’d been together for two years and mates for a little less than one. In all that time he could count on less than five fingers any time they’d spent more than four days apart. 

“Yeah, we’re going to look at apartments there if I get offered the position.” Sam said without confidence. Dean frowned at his little brother’s lack of faith in himself.

“You’re a shoe in Sam. They’d be stupid not to take you.” He said resolutely and listened as Sam laughed.

“Thanks Dean, that’s what Jess says but it seems too good to be true.” Sam said wistfully.

“You’re going to have Mom fussing over you for you three months, man.” Dean snickered at Sam’s groan.

“Don’t forget Dad too.” At that Dean outright laughed, John had been bugging Sam to put a ring on Jess’s finger for the past few months. He was sure that if it were up to the man, Sam would be married by the time the summer was over.

“You’re on your own with that one.” Dean said happily.

They talked for a few more minutes before Jess started calling for Sam in the background. Dean smiled as he ended the call and pocketed his phone. It was always good to talk to his little brother, but Sam’s happiness was infectious.

He thought quietly about the joy of those surrounding him. Charlie and Dorothy had a good life and soon they’d be engaged. Sam and Jess found a steady rhythm for their shared life as students. John and Mary were retired living out their empty nest years happily. Even Benny and Andrea lived in Louisiana with a bushel of pups running around their yard. Dean wanted that, he craved the happiness that everyone surrounding him had achieved. 

Dean wanted wanted that happiness with Cas. 

His love for the man hadn’t changed over the past two years. Dean had never been able to forget the depth of Cas’s blue eyes or his kindness. The omega had always held a part of Dean’s heart, and he knew it was more than just the scent that trapped him.

It was the way Cas cared so deeply and unapologetically. In the way that he spoke softly but firmly. It was in the way his smile transformed his otherwise solemn face. Cas was everything that Dean wanted and needed in his life, and this week was just a cruel reminder that he’d never get that.

As he sat on the couch contemplating his future, Dean heard a small knock on the door. He wasn’t ashamed to admit that he practically ran and yanked it open to see Cas’s smiling face. The omega stood on his doorstep with a bag in his hands. 

“Hey Cas.” Dean said warmly before enveloping him in a hug. Cas relaxed into the embrace easily and hugged him back, and try as he might, Dean couldn’t ignore the way his heart beat a little faster when he felt those arms wrap around him. 

He held onto Cas a little longer than normal as Dean breathed in the overwhelming scent of home. It took over his senses as it thickened in the air. It was the undeniable smell of his true mate.

“Hi Dean.” Cas murmured as he nonchalantly buried his nose in Dean’s neck. He didn’t mind, loved it actually. His inner alpha was going crazy at the thought of his mate scenting him.

“What are the plans for today?” Cas asked when they finally let go. 

“Going for a bit of a drive down the coast, there’s a good beach that not a lot of people go to and an even better diner. They’ve got the best burgers.” Dean smiled excitedly as he grabbed his keys and lead Cas out to the Impala. 

They shared easy conversation as they drove out of town and towards Dean’s favorite swimming spot. The moments of silence that fell between their words were easy and gave Dean time to think about what their future held for the two.

Maybe he could finally get it right.

*

Cas sat at the booth and looked through the menu. He tried not to focus on the memory of Dean swimming through the water. Tried not to think about the tiny water droplets that made paths down the Alpha’s hard chest. He wanted to follow those paths with his tongue. 

Cas groaned and closed his eyes, thanking god that Dean had left for the bathroom. He wondered if he affected the alpha as much as the alpha seemed to affect him. If the way he caught Dean watching him was any indicator, he did.

God, he hoped he did.

They’d spent the late morning laughing and swimming in the summer heat. Cas didn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun playing a stupid game of Marco Polo. He was gone for Dean, always had been, but it was even worse now.

The alpha had grown in the past two years. His body was harder and he filled out in areas where he’d been gaunt before. His personality had changed too, where Dean used to be cocky and confident he was now quiet and reserved. There was no facade that Cas had to break down, it was all laid out in front of him. 

Dean had been shy when they first got to the beach, he watched Cas’s reaction carefully. The omega found himself thankful that he didn’t have to fake his quiet awe at the beauty of Dean’s ‘secret swimming hole.’ And when Cas told him it was the most beautiful place he’d seen, the alpha’s face was transformed with happiness as he smiled with joy. 

Cas wanted to share so much with Dean. His life and all its secrets seemed like a good start. He just wished he knew how to broach the subject. He wanted more than this week, he wanted forever.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Dean asked as he slid into the booth opposite of Cas. 

“Just life.” Cas answered honestly as he smiled at Dean, who smiled back.

“Crazy huh? You did all this searching and I did all this running, only to be put back together again.” Dean said thoughtfully as he fiddled with his hands.

“Almost like fate.” Cas said wistfully before blushing a deep red and hiding his face. Dean laughed warmly.

“Yeah, that’s what I’ve been hearing.” He said quietly. Cas looked up at him, shocked to see the openness written on Dean’s face.

“You’ve heard?” 

“Yeah, well my mom said it had to be fate, written in the stars or some shit. I just can’t believe you’re here.” Dean said seriously before taking a drink of his water.

“You know, I would have been here a lot sooner if you went to one of the places you mentioned before.” Cas laughed as Dean made a show of rolling his eyes.

“But then I would never would have found this great swimming hole to take you to.” Dean winked as Cas rolled his eyes this time.

“Good point,” they grew quiet and Cas could feel the question he’d been wanting to ask on the tip of his tongue. He figured there was no better time than now to get it out. “Are you happy Dean?” The alpha sucked in a breath and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“For the most part, yeah. I’ve got a business and a home, live in one of the most beautiful places in the world. But...” Dean trailed off.

“But?” Cas prodded, wanting to get an answer from the man.

“But, there’s things I want, and I just don’t know if they’re in the books for me.” Dean said solemnly. Cas felt the need to reach out and comfort Dean, but resisted the urge before he did some he might regret.

“I don’t know Cas, I guess I just thought I’d have more by now.” Dean shook his head a frowned.

“Like what?” Cas asked.

“A mate to share my life with, some pups. Someone who understands that I’m not just an alpha.” Dean answered quietly. 

“No, you’re not just an alpha.” Cas agreed, nodding his head. He could be that person for Dean, he so badly wanted to be that person for Dean. 

“I used to think I knew what being an alpha was all about, but I’m starting to doubt myself.” Dean laughed as he stared into Cas’s eyes.

“Not a lot of people have it figured out, Dean.” Cas said comfortingly as he reached out and touched Dean’s hand gently. The alpha stared at their hands laying together before wrapping his fingers around Cas’s gently. 

“Who would have thought?” Dean asked shaking his head as he stared at their hands with amazement.

“I’ve always hoped.” Cas whispered.

Dean looked up and stared at Cas with ill contained adoration. Before Cas could realize, his hand was being gently kissed by Dean.

Yeah, Cas was a goner.

*

The next morning Cas woke up and smiled at the smell of coffee. The happiness of his morning was only slightly dampened by the impending video conference with his lawyer. He knew that Gabe and Anna would have left the house by now, a suggestion that the lawyer made to make sure Cas was comfortable.

Once he set up his spot at the dining room table, Cas waited expectantly until he heard the ringing that indicated there was an incoming video call.

“Hello Castiel, my name is Bela Talbot.” Cas stared at the face of a fierce woman through the screen of Gabe’s computer. Gabe and Bela decided, much to Cas’s disappointment, that a video conference would be the best way to introduce the two. 

“Hi.” Cas said awkwardly. He felt weird talking to her over this platform of communication. He would have been much more comfortable with having the conversation on the phone. Gabe had said something about Bela wanting to see his face so she could tell if anything made him uncomfortable.

“I hope you’re enjoying your time on the beach, I find them to be quite relaxing,” Bela said as she shuffled through some papers. She was sat at a table with a large window behind her. “Myself and a few of my associates have been putting your case together and, I have to say, it’s coming along nicely.” She looked up and smiled at Cas. It was almost predatory and made the omega glad she wasn’t working against him.

“So I’ve heard.” Cas responded stiffly.

“There’s a few things we’ll need to cover before serving Balthazar with papers and I was hoping you would be willing to go over that with me today.” She was to the point, and Cas found it oddly comforting to know that she wouldn’t beat around the bush.

“First, though, I wanted to open the floor to you. I know you must have questions and I would be happy to answer them for you.” Bela smiled at Cas again, this time there was nothing but warmth and sincerity on her face as she waited for him to speak.

“I, uh, I do have some questions,” Cas stuttered as he looked down at the notebook and pen he’d brought. There were a few questions he’d prepared before the meeting and wanted to make sure he would remember them. “First, I want to know how this case will be handled.” Bela nodded and adjusted her glasses.

“My law firm is one that respects the privacy of it’s customers. I don’t plan for this to become a public spectacle and, if Balthazar’s lawyers know what’s best for their client, they’ll plan for that as well.” The threat was apparent in her voice as she stated her plans.

“Our split was public, so you have to understand my apprehension.” Cas stared nervously as he fiddled with his hands.

“I know it was, and I more than understand your nerves when it comes to this. Just know that I will do everything in my power to keep this a private matter.” Cas nodded, happy with the answer she gave him.

“Gabe said you focused on omega’s rights, there must be a reason for that.” Cas said wondering what had piqued her interest in this type of law.

“My mother was an omega. She went through something similar to what you experienced with Balthazar, only she winded up dead. I vowed that I would do everything within my power to protect the underdog the day my father killed her. I think I’ve done a good job of it so far.” Bela stated coldly. Cas nodded his head and frowned. She didn’t strike him as the type of person who wanted sympathy though, so he didn’t offer it.

“I don’t want Gabe and Anna to get too involved. They’ve dealt with enough.” At this Bela hardened before taking a deep breath.

“Castiel, you must understand that your siblings only want what’s best for you. They will be involved with the case as character witnesses. It’s one of the only ways to continue.” Bela said sternly as if this was out of the question.

“Why do they have to be a part of it?” Cas asked stiffly.

“They’re the people who were there for you before and after everything happened. The people who saw how it affected you. They have to be involved so they can attest to what you went through, that and Mr. Winchester.” Cas frowned at the screen and searched for words. There was absolutely no way that he would ask Dean to be a part of this. He could’t believe that Gabe thought he would be ok with that.

“Dean won’t be involved.” Cas said firmly. Bela smiled and looked at him as if he were a lost child.

“I’m just going to come out and say it, I contacted Mr. Winchester five weeks ago about this and he agreed to share his side of the story if it came down to it.” Bela paused and waited for Cas’s reaction, but he didn’t give her one. His face was blank as he tried to process the information she had divulged. 

Dean had known about the trial all along. He’d agreed to come to court and share whatever his side of the story was and he’d done this all without mentioning anything to Cas. They spent the past couple of days talking about their lives and not once had the alpha mentioned that Bela had contacted him.

Cas tried to form words around the shock and anger he felt. How could Gabe let Bela get in touch with Dean and not say anything to him about it? Had Dean just planned to say his peace and leave without a backwards glance at Cas? 

“You... got in touch with Dean?” Cas mumbled, not sure if he was expecting an answer. 

Bela, for her part, looked every bit the calm and cool professional as she watched Cas through the screen. She had been warned by both siblings that he wouldn’t be too keen to involve Mr. Winchester, but she had a feeling that he would be able to put the nail in the coffin of this case. An opportunity like that was too good to pass up.

“Castiel, you must have known that he would need to be involved to some extent. Mr. Winchester has kindly agreed to step forward and share his observations of the week spent with you that lead up to the ultimate demise of your relationship. He will be able to help the court understand a point of view that they would be otherwise unable to.” 

“How long?” Cas asked lethally. His anger was overriding every emotion in his body and he felt like he was on a precipice of going down a dark hole he hadn’t been for a while.

“What do you mean?”

“How long has Gabe known about this?” He clarified.

“I told him four months ago of my plan to find Mr. Winchester. He agreed thinking that I wouldn’t be able to locate him, but I have access to resources that aren’t available to you. Mr. Winchester wanted this to be done discreetly, he didn’t want his involvement to be known, but since this is your case that’s impossible.” Bela said simply, as if Cas wasn’t having a crisis in front of her.

“And my siblings? Did you tell them where he was?” Cas asked 

“The general location, yes.” Bela answered.

“I’ve got to go.” Cas said before slamming the laptop shut and standing. He walked around the house aimlessly before he grabbed his phone and stormed out the front door with one location in mind.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized that the cafe was something I would need to tie together with the addition of the trial to this story. 
> 
> Though I don’t know a thing about law, I presume how I tied it together wouldn’t actually happen in real life. There really wasn’t another way for me to do that with the story ending the way I wanted it to. 
> 
> There will be one more chapter after this, a short prologue that I’ll hopefully have up on the next couple of days.
> 
> Thank you guys for everything! I’ve never actually put my writing out there for others until I joined this site. So, really just thank you all.

Chapter Fourteen

Cas marched up to the home that Dean called his and pounded on the door. He only thought momentarily of how deranged he must look. His hair was messy from running his hands through it and he was still in his pajama pants, but he didn’t care. He had a score to settle.

“Cas?” Dorothy said as she peaked her head out. She had a confused look and seemed alarmed by the undoubtedly angry expression on his face.

“Where is he?” Cas all but growled out. Dorothy immediately stepped aside and let him through the threshold, something that shocked him with how he was acting.

“Dean’s still asleep, but he should wake up any minute.” Dorothy said even as Cas started making his way towards the room Dean had pointed out to him earlier in the week.

He pulled the door open without remorse and was hit by the scent of alpha and home. Cas only took a moment to breath it in before advancing towards Dean’s sleeping figure and shaking his shoulder.

“Wake up ass butt.” Cas said angrily as Dean turned over and groaned. He looked up and smiled at Cas momentarily before his face fell.

“What the-“ 

“You have some explaining to do.” Cas cut Dean off mid sentence and crossed his arms over his chest. His right foot tapped impatiently, and he realized that he looked the picture of an upset omega. He also realized that he didn’t care, because he was definitely an upset omega.

The scent of the room soured as both of their smells mixed. Upset omega and protective alpha swirled around the air making it hard for Cas to breathe. He forced himself to take shallow breaths through his mouth, but even then the mixture was heavy.

“Cas, I don’t know what I’m explaining.” Dean said with annoyance as he pulled the covers back and stood from his bed. They were within inches of each other and Cas made a valiant effort to ignore the fact that Dean was only in his boxers.

“The trial, Dean. You knew about the trial this whole time!” Cas exclaimed, hurt lancing through his voice. A small sob escaped him, much to his disappointment, and Dean reached out to offer comfort. Cas took a step back, narrowly avoiding the touch and causing Dean’s face to fall even further.

“Cas.. I- it’s not what it looks like.” Dean groaned defeatedly as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Do you care to explain, because the way it looks to me is that you knew this whole time that Zar and I were separated and you still tore me apart at the diner!” Cas yelled. He was faintly aware of the commotion behind him and turned his head to see Charlie standing in the doorway. She had the look of a wild omega as she started walking into the room but was quickly grabbed by Dorothy.

“Leave it, Charles. We’re fine.” Dean bit out as he shook his head. Charlie refused to move and was soon drug out by Dorothy as they argued. Seconds later Cas heard the deafening slam of the front door.

“I’m about five seconds from walking out that door, Dean. Talk.” Cas commanded. Dean’s face fell with confusion and reluctance as he began pacing in the small area that was available to him. 

“A while back this chick, Bela, contacted me about some trial involving you and Balthazar. She asked if I would share my side of the week we spent together,” Dean stopped and grabbed Cas’s hands desperately. “She never told me what the thing was about, just that I could really help you with offering my testimony. I thought you guys were suing the agency.” Dean’s eyes searched Cas’s pleadingly.

“And you just agreed without knowing?” Cas said with disbelief.

“Yeah, I know it was stupid. Sam lit into me after I told him what I’d agreed to do, but I didn’t care.” Dean looked away and dropped Cas’s hands.

“Why? Why would you agree to help Zar? Why would you go against the agency?” Cas demanded, his voice annoyed.

“Because I.....” Dean mumbled unintelligibly. Cas heaved a sigh and threw his hands up in the air.

“Damnit Dean, I cant hear you!” Cas yelled. Dean whipped around and glared at the omega.

“Because I fucking love you Cas! There I said it! Are you happy now?” Dean said angrily as he pulled at his hair again. Cas glared at him and shook his head in disbelief.

“I’m not buying it. Why would you treat me like you did at the diner if you loved me?” Cas asked.

“I thought you knew. Thought that you had been the one who told her to contact me and use me in the lawsuit, then you came here and flaunted the fact that you and Balthazar were still happy in my face.” Dean said clenching his jaw. 

“Do I seem like the type of person to ‘flaunt’?” Cas said with air quotations. Dean sighed and rubbed his hand over the back of his neck.

“You don’t, but Balthazar sure the hell does. I thought he was he here to show me that you were his before I was actually called to testify,” Dean shook his head. “Cas, I was going to do it because I thought it would help you, even if that meant seeing you happily mated with that piece of shit. It was worth it to me to see you one last time.” Dean said defeatedly. 

“Were you planning on telling me?” Cas asked searching for the answer he needed to hear.

“I had no way to contact you Cas, I thought if I saw you at the trial and you were happy that it would maybe bring some closure,” Dean scoffed angrily. “I just don’t get it!” He exclaimed with frustration and threw his hands up in the air.

“Don’t get what, Dean?”

“I don’t understand how I spent one damn week with you and I already knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you by my side. I know we’re true mates, but that can’t explain our connection. It just can’t be that simple.” Dean sighed as he sat down on his bed. 

Cas stood rigidly before joining him. They sat at a distance from each other as they both thought. How could Dean be so obtuse? Of course Cas had picked up on this during the time that they spent together, but he didn’t realize just how bad it was.

“It’s in our biology, Dean,” Cas sighed as he looked down at his hands. “I read that true mates just aren’t physically compatible. We’re compatible on every aspect. Our emotions and personalities sync with each other, it’s nature’s way of giving us what we need to get through this shit.” 

Cas looked up at Dean who was staring at him thoughtfully. He seemed to be lost in his own little world for a few moments before looking up at the ceiling.

“Missouri once told me that there are few of us out there who have true mates, she calls them the Old Ones. Said that those who have them are always meant to find each other and have lived many lives together. Death is only the begging. They die and are reborn to find their mate again because they were never meant to live apart from the other. Says it’s some kind of reincarnation thing,

“That we die and stay gone for only a few hundred years before we become restless and come back to find the one we love. Kind of poetic, when you think about it. Makes me wonder how many lives you and have spent searching for each other.” Dean’s cheeks turned red as he stared anywhere but at Cas. 

Cas was speechless at the thought. He’d read theories of it before but was never one to believe in those types of fairy tales. When Dean put it like that, though, he wondered if there was any truth behind it. Could it have been that he and this lovely alpha spent millennia searching for each other only to always be separated in the end?

“I know it sounds like a bunch of bull, but it just makes sense to me. I’ve always felt like something was missing, there was a piece of me out there just waiting to make a whole. I’ve never felt like a whole unless I’m with you.” Dean turned towards Cas and grabbed his hands urgently. 

“I know I’m an idiot, Cas. I know I shouldn’t have ran, I should have fought. I know I shouldn’t have yelled at you, I should have groveled,” Dean sank down to his knees in front of Cas, his eyes shifting restlessly as he searched for something in Cas’s face. “So this is me fighting and groveling. I’m not a good alpha, Cas. I’m emotional and annoying. I don’t get angry when someone challenges me, I want things that no other alpha wants and I’m too scared to admit it, but I will.

“I don’t want you to be round bellied and barefoot as you take care our home. I want you to be round bellied with my pups as you watch me take care of our home. I don’t want you to stay at home with the pups while you lose yourself to the omega role. I want you to have a shop, your own business, as our pups watch you and know that the omega role is shit that society made up. I want to protect you. I want you to protect me. I don’t want to mate you so the whole world knows your mine, I want you to mate me so the whole world knows you chose me. That’s what I want Cas. If it’s not what you want I understand, I just have to know now before I get even more lost.” Dean watched Cas closely as confusion came across the omega’s face. 

“But Dean, omegas don’t bite their alphas in mating, it’s the other way around.” Cas said as Dean smiled and laughed lightly at how hopeless Cas seemed.

“Not me, I want you to mark me right where everyone can see it.” Dean said resolutely. Cas felt like his world was spinning as he looked down at Dean’s hopeful face. He didn’t know what to say.

His heart was beating wildly as he watched Dean’s face, looking for any sign that this was a lie, but he couldn’t find anything but open honesty. Cas carefully removed one of his hands from Dean’s and rested it on the alpha’s cheek as his thumb stroked gently at the man’s cheekbone. He wasn’t sure of it, but Cas could swear he could hear a purr from deep within Dean’s chest.

“I want that too, Dean. Want you.” Cas murmured as he leaned towards Dean and kissed him softly. 

“Yeah?” Dean smiled softly up at Cas, hope flittering across his face.

“In any way and every way possible I want you. As a friend, a mate, and a partner I want you. One week will simply not do when we could spend a lifetime together.” Cas said softly as he quoted the last part of the letter Dean had written years ago.

Dean bowed his head blushed. His neck was bright red as he laughed quietly and looked back up at Cas. The look on his face made Cas’s heart beat louder. The alpha looked to him as if could move mountains.

“You read my letter?” Dean asked as he smiled.

“Of course I read it, you idiot,” Cas laughed as he pulled Dean onto the bed and laid back with the alpha hovering over him. “I memorized every word.” Cas smiled and pulled Dean down for a searing kiss.

*

Dean paced the driveway anxiously watching for any sign of a uhaul pulling onto his road. Cas said they would be there in there three hours but that three hours and fifteen minutes ago. Where the hell were they?

The past two months had been somewhat of a whirlwind. Dean had gone back to Lawrence with Cas where they went a head with the lawsuit. They both had been shocked at how quickly the process went, but it turned out that even Balthazar’s lawyers knew they had a losing case. 

Zar has settled the day after Dean took the stand and spoke of how Cas and he were true mates. Sam had told Dean that no jury would see it unfit that Cas left Balthazar with the financial records, incriminating evidence, and the fact that there were true mates involved. By the time the trial was done, everyone was sick with the thought of Cas’s controlling relationship.

Cas had gotten a rather large settlement but, most importantly, a public apology. The fact that Balthazar lost his job right after was just the cherry on top.

Bela spent a while trying to convince the couple to make their mating official. She said that it was bound to happen, and nothing could help the trial more than having them walk into the room with the undoubtable scent of mate. Cas had fought her tooth and nail on that one, something that bruised Dean’s ego until the man had explained why.

Cas didn’t want their mating to be done for the trial. He wanted it to be done out of choice, not necessity. The omega wanted it to be done when they were at home where they could spend days celebrating it properly. When Dean asked him where home was, Cas just looked at him like he was an idiot.

“Well it sure the hell isn’t in Lawrence.” Cas said before telling Dean that he wasn’t the only one who wanted to live by the ocean. 

Though Mary had been very dismayed that the couple chose to live together in Beaufort, Dean was not so secretly happy that they weren’t going to return to Lawrence. Although he would have if Cas had wanted him to, he didn’t like the idea of running into old clients with his mate. 

After the trial Dean had stayed for a couple weeks to help Cas pack up the remainder of his life. The omega insisted, though, that the last week he spent in Lawrence needed to be with just his siblings. 

So Dean had spent the last week preparing the house for Cas’s arrival in between jobs. He’d stocked the fridge, cleaned up the lawn, bought new bedding, and got enough toiletries to last them a few months. He was anxious and grouchy. So much so that Jo told him he couldn’t come back to the diner until Cas was moved in and they were happily mated. She hadn’t been joking either, when Dean tried to go in the next day she flat out refused to serve him. 

So sue him if he was getting a little sad that they took fifteen minutes longer than what Cas had told him. 

When Dean finally saw the uhaul pull onto his street, he walked down to the end of the driveway and waved his hands. He wanted to make sure they remembered which house they were going to. He didn’t care if he could plainly see Gabe pointing at him and laughing. 

“We know where to go squirrel.” Gabe said as he pulled the truck into the driveway, his window was down and there was music playing that Dean thought no respectable person should be listening to. It had to have been Gabe’s choice.

Before he could get a snarky remark in, Cas had jumped out of the passenger seat and wrapped his arms around Dean. He sank his nose into Dean’s scent gland and took a few deep breaths before smiling at the alpha bashfully. 

“Welcome home.” Dean smiled back and placed a gentle kiss on his omega’s lips.

*

“I love you guys, but you have got to go.” Cas whispered sternly at Gabe and Anna. It was nearly eleven and his siblings had spent the whole day helping him unload what little he’d brought with him.

“We’re just enjoying the hospitality.” Anna said as she smiled wickedly at Cas. He fixed a pointed glare on his face and listened to see if Dean was on his way back from the bathroom yet. The coast was clear for now.

“No you’re not, you’re being giant cock blocks and you need to get the hell out!”Cas said hurriedly.

“Why Castiel, I’ve been called a lot of things in my life, and cock block is definitely one of them, but not from my baby brother!” Gabe mocked with a shocked look on his face. 

“What was that?” Dean asked with a look of confusion on his face as he walked back towards the room. 

“Oh nothing, Anna and Gabe were just saying that they were tired and going to check into the hotel for the night.” Cas said innocently smiling up at Dean.

“Are you guys sure about the hotel thing? I have an extra bed and I can make the couch up for whoever wants it.” Dean asked frowning.

“They’re fine Dean.” Cas snapped as he watched the wicked smile come across Gabe’s face.

“Yeah Dean-O, we’re good.” Gabe said as he stood from the couch and began making his way to the front door with Anna following behind him.

“Oh and by the way,” Gabe said turning around and looking at Dean. “Hurt my brother and I’ll kill you.” He said with a wink before walking out the door.

Cas groaned and shook his head as Dean laughed lightly. Soon the omega felt the warm embrace of his alpha as Dean wrapped his arms around him. He smiled down at Cas and kissed his forehead.

“Why does he always say that?” Cas wondered aloud as Dean grabbed his hand and led him back to their room.

“It’s a big brother thing.” Dean shrugged and flipped on the light. 

“I know you didn’t give that spiel to Jessica Moore,” Cas raised his eyebrow at Dean. The alpha looked sheepish as he rubbed the back of his neck. Cas felt his jaw drop as he began laughing. “You did!”

“Hey now, it’s a requirement!” Dean said as he laughed with Cas. 

Dean watched as Cas climbed into the bed and sunk down into the sheets. He had a small frown on his face as he sniffed at the soft material followed by an petulant sigh.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, feeling his heart drop.

“They don’t smell like you.” Cas said pointedly as Dean shut the light off before climbing into the bed next to Cas.

“Yeah, I bought new bedding. Thought maybe you’d like it.” Dean shrugged as he crawled over Cas and framed the omega’s face with his forearms.

“While I appreciate the sentiment, but I like your scent more.” Cas smiled and wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, pulling him down for a kiss.

“Guess we’re just going to have to get our scents on it.” Dean mumbled as he moved down to lick at Cas’s scent gland.

The omega whined softly at the feel of Dean at his neck. Cas ran his hands up and down Dean’s back before settling them on his ass and pulling him down so his knot was settled against Cas’s dick.

“Smell so good Cas.” Dean whispered as he picked his head up and stared into Cas’s eyes.

“You smell like home.” Cas murmured back before pulling Dean down for a searing kiss. They rocked their hips together as Dean lowered one hand down to clench desperately at Cas’s hip.

They moved together for a few moments before they were both panting and surfacing for air. Cas reached down and wrapped his hand around Dean’s knot, squeezing gently. Dean moaned harshly as he sought out Cas’s lips again. 

“Need you, need you in me.” Dean groaned. He stilled after the words slipped out of his mouth. 

Cas grabbed at Dean’s hair as the alpha tried to burrow his face into the omega’s neck. When he pulled gently he could see the shame and embarrassment on Dean’s face as he turned red under the omega’s watchful eye.

“Sorry, shouldn’t have said that.” Dean said as he rolled his hips into Cas’s, trying to move past the subject without having to talk about it.

“Is that what you want?” Cas asked quietly and watched as a tear of embarrassment slipped down Dean’s face. He didn’t even think about wiping it away with his thumb as his hands rested gently on his alpha’s face.

“Thought about it.” Dean shrugged awkwardly. 

Cas understood Dean’s reluctance. Most alphas would never think about something like that, let alone admit it out loud, but he didn’t care. He loved the tender side of Dean and had wished that the alpha had said something sooner.

“Please Cas, can we just... forget about it.” Dean begged as Cas shook his head and pushed the alpha off him gently before moving so he was straddling him. He bent down and kissed Dean, running his tongue along the alpha’s lips before the alpha opened his mouth.

Cas began rocking his hips slowly with the rhythm of his tongue. In and out, slowly fucking into Dean’s mouth as he grasped for the bottle of lube Dean kept on his night stand.

“I’ll take care of you Dean.” Cas whispered reverently as he flipped the bottle open. He poured some out on his fingers before reaching behind him and rubbing gently at Dean’s hole. 

Cas drew his fingers away as he began kissing a path down Dean’s chest, stopping at the v of his hips to lick the defined muscles. 

Dean was a moaning mess by the time Cas had made his way to his alpha’s knot. The way the man lost himself at Cas’s touches made the omega feel powerful. He knew that no one else would be able to make Dean quiver the way he could, and he felt a rush of excitement at the thought.

Cas wrapped his lips around Dean’s shaft and began slowly bobbing his head up and down his length. 

“Fuck... Cas.” Dean groaned as he buried his hands in Cas’s hair. 

Cas let Dean guide him as he began circling one digit at the alpha’s entrance. The small amount of pressure made the alpha still before he began all out panting. The omega waited until Dean was whining mess before working one finger into his ass.

“Oh..” Dean moaned lightly as he let his hands fall from Cas’s head in favor of gripping the sheets. 

“So good for me, Dean.” Cas praised as he pumped the finger back and forth, working the hole open. 

“I.. fuck.. feels so good.” Dean moaned, looking lost as he stared down at Cas with amazed eyes. 

Cas smiled and moved up to kiss Dean deeply. The searing heat behind the slide of their tongues gave Cas the opportunity to work a second finger in without Dean noticing. He began scissoring the alpha open and found himself able to fit a third finger in before long.

“Oh god! What the fuck?” Dean cried out as Cas ran his finger over the alpha’s prostate. He chuckled darkly as the alpha began muttering incoherently.

“You like that, Alpha?” Cas asked innocently as he continued torturing Dean with pleasure. 

“Please Cas, need you.. please..” Dean said brokenly, sobs escaping his body. 

When Cas pulled his fingers out Dean cried out at the loss but was soon transfixed by the sight of Cas pouring lube on his dick.

“You’re mine.” Cas groaned as he lined his dick up with Dean’s hole and sank in without preamble. 

Dean cried out and wrapped his arms around Cas’s neck helplessly. Soon the omega set a punishing rhythm, his hips snapping forward and balls hitting Dean’s ass. The noise of their panting breaths and quiet moans filled the room as they chased an ecstasy neither of them had known before.

“Yours. Yours. Yours.” Dean repeated with every thrust of Cas’s hips. 

Cas could feel his balls tighten as his stomach filled with sweet darkness. He felt like he was strung tight, waiting for this moment all his life. He wanted nothing more than to make Dean cum on his dick, well almost. 

“Mate me, Dean. Bite me.” Cas said urgently as he continued pounding into his alpha. Dean nodded his head urgently as he pulled Cas in for another searing kiss.

“Make me yours, Alpha.” Cas said when they came up for air. He carefully slipped out of Dean, causing the alpha to cry out at the loss. Cas wanted to be caught on Dean’s knot when he finally got his mark though, so he straddled Dean’s hips quickly and sank down on the already expanding knot.

“So perfect, so right for me.” Cas murmured as he began rocking back and forth on Dean’s knot.

“So beautiful, Cas. Mine.” Dean bit out as he forgot the loss of being filled in favor of snapping his hips up to sink further into Cas. 

Cas bent down and presented his neck for Dean. The alpha growled under him as he surged up, placing a hand on Cas’s neck. Dean scented for the perfect spot before sucking at skin on the right of Cas’s neck. The alpha pulled back just a moment to look at his omega.

“You sure?” Dean asked, a moment of clarity dawning over his eyes. Cas groaned impatiently as the alpha continued fucking up into him.

“Yes, fuck... Dean, make me yours. Mate me, breed me, wanna be fat with your pups. Bite me Dean, please.” Cas whined before he felt the sharp pain at his neck. 

It didn’t hurt as much as Cas thought it would. In fact, it felt good. The omega howled out as the claim sank into his skin, washing over his body. All of his pieces seemed to come together with that one mark from his alpha. 

Cas didn’t wait long after Dean had licked at the flesh wound before sinking his teeth into his alpha. He wanted him to know how amazing it felt. How right it was. Dean let out a strangled groan as his knot caught and popped at the same time he felt the bite.

Cas babbled as he came, his cum shooting across Dean’s chest. He smiled down at his alpha and began purring as he snuggled into Dean’s neck, licking at the wound to clean it. They lay silently as they tried to catch their breaths.

“Love you.” Dean whispered once he had finally gained control of his breathing. Cas smiled before planting a sweet kiss on Dean’s lips.

“And I you.” He whispered back.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end. Thank you guys!

Prologue

“Ainsley Marie, you better not be doing what I think you’re doing.” Dean glared at his eldest as she went to grab one of the candy bars Gabe had thrown on the table. She looked at him with wide green eyes before bursting into tears.

“Gabe said I could!” She got out between sobs.

It had been a long day for the pups. They’d spent most of the day in the water while Gabe stuffed them full of candy because he ‘wanted to be the favorite uncle.’ While Dean had explained, rather patiently, that the children love him just as much as Sam, Gabe had argued saying that Carter told him Sam was his favorite because he was so tall that when the oaf of man gave him a piggy back ride he could see the whole world. 

To top it all off, Cas had spent the day in his shop working on some project for a big buyer. So Dean had to put up with Gabe’s shenanigans on his own. By the time Cas had walked in the door, Carter was stumbling around on a sugar high while Dean was frantically trying to clean up the paint Ainsley had spilled on the floor before it stained the carpet. 

Their house was in shambles as Cas walked carefully around the legos and fell down on the couch, his hand protectively resting on the round bump that was so small you could almost miss it. Two kids under the age of four with another on the way, a recent move, and dealing with Gabe was enough to make Dean break. 

He felt the overwhelming need to cry with Ainsley and would have if it hadn’t been for Cas walking into the room. 

“Papa, Gabe told me I could have the candy bar but Daddy said no!” She sobbed out as Cas bent down to pick her up. He pushed her dark hair out of her eyes and smiled as she looked up at him with a tear stained face.

“I think Daddy’s right, sweetie. You’ve had enough for the day, besides it’s almost bed time and you don’t even have your jammies on. Carter is all dressed and ready for story time, we’re just waiting for you.” Cas said softly as Ainsley buried her head in his neck.

“I don’t wanna miss story time.” She sobbed as Cas shushed her soothingly.

“I know, that’s why you’ve gotta get changed and meet us on the couch.” Cas said before setting her down. She nodded her head and rubbed her eyes as she began stumbling out of the dining room towards her bedroom.

“Do you need me to offer you some comforting words?” Cas asked Dean, smiling as he wrapped his alpha in a hug.

“Oh my god, you have no clue.” Dean groaned and buried his head in Cas’s neck. He breathed in the comforting scent of home and purred as Cas ran his hands up and down Dean’s back.

“It’s ok, Alpha. I know things are a bit crazy right now, but Gabe leaves tomorrow and we can finish unpacking.” Dean nodded his head and sighed as he pulled his face out Cas’s neck.

“It’ll be good to finish making this place ours.” Dean smiled as he looked around the room they were standing in.

“I think so. I know it’s not on the beach, but the five minute walk isn’t too bad.” Cas shrugged as he walked over to the table and grabbed the candy bar. Dean laughed as Cas opened it and began taking bites out of it.

“Yeah, as much I hate to admit it, not having the ocean as a backyard is comforting with those two shits.” Dean smiled as Cas scoffed.

“Those babies are angels. They take after me.” Cas said resolutely as he smacked Dean lightly on the arm.

“I’m sorry, are we talking about the same pups?” Dean laughed.

They settled into the routine of having pups easily. When Ainsley was first born, they both found themselves thankful to own their own businesses. Dean had been doing well enough to the point that he could hire a couple people to help out with the repairs around town. He had to rent a small office to work out of, but it had been well worth it. 

Cas had bought a shop on the board walk, in his own name, and worked out of it three days a week. When he wasn’t home, Dean stayed with the kids. The omega found himself eternally grateful that his alpha was just as much a present factor in family life that he was. 

When they found out Cas was pregnant this last time, they decided it was time to move. The two bedroom home just wasn’t big enough for five people and the guests that still came to visit them. Up to that point, Ainsley and Carter had shared a room, but they wanted both of them to have their own. So it just made sense to get it done while they still had time and Cas wasn’t so far along that he couldn’t be helpful. 

The five bedroom three bath home had more than enough space for their family, plus it had a lawn which the kids fell in love with the instant they saw it. Dean already had plans to build a swing set in the backyard once the third pup was born. Until then, they were more than busy enough with projects around home and work. 

When they were looking for a new home, they’d both agreed it would be best if it wasn’t on the water. Not only would it be a little bit cheaper, but it would ease their minds. Ainsley had recently discovered how to unlock doors and Cas swore Dean was going to have an aneurysm every time she wasn’t in the same room as him. So the five minute walk to the beach was an easy accommodation. 

It was good. It was home.

“Also, as a side note, I had that situation completely under control.” Dean said as he began walking towards the living room.

“Bull shit you did! You so owe me a foot rub for saving your ass.” Cas rolled his eyes as Dean sighed.

“Cas we talked about this, you can’t do something and then just claim that I owe you a foot rub.” Dean said in faux scold.

“But I love them.” Cas pleaded as they walked into the living room.

“Yeah, well all you gotta do is ask. I don’t want to owe you a foot rub for you brushing your teeth.” Dean said teasingly as they sat down next to each other.

Carter was sitting on Gabe’s lap laughing about something the man had said. Ainsley walked into the room with a completely mismatched pajama set and crawled into Dean’s lap. She snuggled up to his chest and began playing with his fingers while Cas smiled warmly at the picturesque moment. 

He knew they had gone through a lot, and it was all worth it. He’d do it all over again for an outcome like this. Dean was the picture of a supportive partner, always encouraging him and offering him the aide and inspiration he needed. Ainsley and Carter were definitely far from angels, but they were his. Carter had Dean’s biting sense of humor while Ainsley questioned everything that happened with open curiosity. It was perfect.

“Alright, what’ll it be tonight?” Cas asked. They tried to do story time every night, of course it didn’t always work out, but for the most part they were able to get it done. 

“I wanna hear bout you and Daddy.” Carter said excitedly as he pointed at Cas.

“Yeah, how you met!” Ainsley exclaimed with a brilliant smile on her face. 

“Yeah! That’s what I want!” Carter said nodding his head.

Well this was certainly new.

“Well, uh...” Dean tried before trailing off and looking at Cas with panic. 

Cas was just as lost as Dean. He knew that one day the kids would ask and hoped that by that time they would have a carefully constructed lie. As it were, though, they’d never discussed what that lie might be.

“I got this guys,” Gabe said as he sat up straighter with a playful smirk on his face. Cas tried to interject, but before he could get anything out Gabe had already begun. “Once upon a time Papa had succor that Daddy really, really liked-“ 

“Shut up Gabe!” Dean yelled, his face bright red as he hurried to stop the story.

“Papa, Daddy said a bad word!” Ainsley yelled as Cas buried his face in his hands.

Well, it was almost perfect.


End file.
